User reviews

Last night I decided to watch Ed Wood's crime film, "Jail Bait." Now, much like Wood's other films, the storyline, acting, direction, music and just about everything else are completely weak. However, I thoroughly enjoyed it. The acting is enjoyable because it's so bad that you have to laugh. I would recommend this film to anyone looking for a good time. Plus, the twist actually impressed me. I did not see it coming. A lot of people like to go on about how Ed Wood is the worst director of all time, but how can this be when he's made movies that so many people have enjoyed? Sure, they're awful movies, but he's done his job and entertained us. That's all I ask for.

In "Jail Bait", Ed Wood applies his boundless enthusiasm and limited talent to the crime movie genre. From a technical viewpoint, it's actually one of his less unsound features, although that cuts down somewhat on the unintentional laughs that it provides. The story is actually pretty solid, and could have served as the basis for a pretty good film-noir. Most of its weaknesses are in the acting, pacing, and dialogue, plus the occasional zany out-of-place detail.

The story uses a basically familiar setup, but adds a couple of extra components to it. Lyle Talbot and Steve Reeves play a pair of policemen investigating the misdeeds of a young man whose father is a highly respected doctor. The doctor and his daughter, meanwhile, try to protect the son both from the police and from the career criminal who has led him astray. For the most part, the story is conventional but believable, with a rather clever ending.

Most of the rest of the production does not come up to the level of the story. The ever-loyal Talbot gives his typically earnest performance, trying to make the dialogue sound as good as possible, while enduring some amusingly awkward interactions with the stilted Reeves. The rest of the cast is generally nondescript, and sometimes noticeably out of their depth.

The dialogue contains some of the expected unintentional laughs, and the characters often overexert themselves on unnecessary exposition or on pointing out details that were already completely obvious. The pacing, likewise, is inconsistent from scene to scene, although with fewer of the kinds of direction and editing slip-ups that generally characterize Wood's features.

No one could ever deny that Wood loved making movies, and he made sincere efforts to make them as well as he could, which is what has kept his movies so watchable despite their shortcomings. "Jail Bait" attempts to emulate the classics of its genre, but it is severely limited by the lack of talent and other resources.

Not as well-known as Wood's notorious 'horror' output but this truly lamentable attempt at a film noir - demonstrating, if only in its ramshackle production values, an affinity with the cinema of Orson Welles and Edgar G. Ulmer - is at least equally inept and hilarious, if still emerging as perhaps his most tolerable effort!

It's practically a manual on how NOT to make a noir: despite a generous dose of hard-boiled - yet godawful - dialogue (particularly in the scenes depicting the gangster's constant bickering with his moll), the film has absolutely no sense of atmosphere, a headache-inducing and inappropriate score, an irrelevant musical number (in blackface, to boot!) and some of the worst, most amateurish acting you're ever likely to see! Perhaps the main culprit in this regard is elderly Herbert Rawlinson (who, amazingly, kept working on such rubbish when he was dying of lung cancer and, in fact, kicked the bucket a day after production wrapped!) as an eminent surgeon who has to contend with a delinquent son; the latter gets embroiled in armed robbery and murder and is subsequently killed by his associate, after the surgeon persuades him to give himself up to the Police. However, the gangster blackmails the old man into doing a makeshift job of plastic surgery in order to avoid capture - but, in perhaps the most uproarious scene of the entire film, the doctor discovers his son's corpse in the gangster's kitchen, without so much as a reaction, and decides to turn the tables on him. While not unpredictable, I must say that the twist ending works...but, unfortunately, the TV reception got screwed up during the last few minutes of the film, so I missed out on some of the details!

By the way, the younger of two cops who tail Rawlison's son throughout the film is none other than future peplum icon Steve Reeves in his film debut - and he looks as uncomfortable in a suit and tie as Chuck Heston!!

People who criticize this picture and its director are missing the point. The movie is the equivalent of a badly produced school play. And that's just the point, the parents who go to see a school play do not go for the acting, directing or any other professional artistic endeavor but for the pure enjoyment of seeing their loved ones on stage. Ed Woods was in love with the movies and no matter what people thought about him and his films he just got pure enjoyment out of making them; and that after all is what entertainment is all about.

None of Ed Wood Jnr's movies are not what I deem great, however I also don't consider any of them among the worst movies of all time or him the worst director. There are better written, made and acted movies out there, but no matter how bad they are they are kind of like guilty pleasures. I do prefer Plan 9 from Outer Space, Bride of the Monster and Glen and Glenda over Jail Bait, but Jail Bait is at least better than Night of the Ghouls, Orgy of the Dead and especially The Sinister Urge. That is my opinion of course. The ending is huge fun, obvious but it does have to be seen to be believed. Jail Bait while having a lot of continuity errors is also one of Wood's better-looking movies, the camera work is not as static and the sets not as wobbly. There is much that is really terrible though, especially the music which is very repetitive and cheesy, it also gets far too much very quickly. The dialogue is truly horrendous as well, though I admit I did bust a gut from laughing at some of the howlers. The story is thankfully more coherent than the likes of Orgy of the Dead and also not as deadly dull as The Sinister Urge, however it is rather sluggish and often illogical, the ending is the highlight and where things really liven up. The acting is really amateurish as well, the best is Herbert Rawlinson while the rest are as stiff as a robot. Steve Reeves does have sex appeal, but it doesn't disguise his very bland acting or that his shirtless scene felt out of place. In conclusion, terrible but somewhat entertaining. Even more entertaining actually is the facts behind the movie, they make for a fascinating read. 3/10 Bethany Cox

Jail Bait (1954) is Ed's second feature, a brave attempt at creating a straight noir-ish thriller on less than a shoestring budget. What we do get is ludicrous tough guy dialog like "You're a dumb dame!" delivered with deadpan (or is it bedpan?) earnestness.

Dolores Fuller follows up her lead role in Glen Or Glenda as Marilyn, a respectable girl from a respectable family who bails out her delinquent and less-than-respectable brother Don for firearms possession. Don, it seems, is up to his eyeballs in trouble, and is mixed up with tin-pot gangster Vic Brady (Timothy Farrell, also in the Ed-scripted The Violent Years). Marilyn pleads with her brother to give up his life of crime - "You know that gun is jail bait" she says – but to no avail. Brady talks Don into robbing the payroll from a nearby theater, but things go horribly wrong – Don shoots the aging security guard and retired policeman, and unknowingly winds the secretary who later identifies the two as Cop Killers. Don admits to his trusting aging father he's killed a man, and dear old dad reluctantly decides to help him; Vic, meanwhile, blackmails the father, who just happens to be a "world famous plastic surgeon", into grafting him a new face. It all turns out horribly – of course – in an outrageous ending that Ed cribbed from a 30s potboiler, but ultimately makes it all Wood.

On the trail of the cop killers is dependable Ed Wood regular Lyle Talbot (Glen Or Glenda, Plan 9…) as Inspector Johns, and a surprise early appearance by bodybuilder and future Hercules star Steve Reeves as his Lieutenant. To say Steve's performance is wooden is unfair – let's just say he looks like he's carved out of a Dutch Elm. Ed gave Steve a somewhat gratuitous not to mention slightly homo-erotic scene, laboriously putting on a shirt and jacket in front of the Inspector. According to Dolores, it took Steve 27 takes to tie that tie. Steve's choice scene with Dolores is even more painful – their strained on-screen exchange is like watching two pained cows chewing their cud.

Herbert Rawlinson, a veteran star of the silent era, plays the father Dr Gregor. According to Ed, Herbert passed away the morning after his final scene was shot…from lung cancer. Which means, as he's wheezing through Ed's convoluted dialog, we're listening to him literally taking his last breaths. Creepy.

At one point Brady's moll says to Dolores: "Take a look at this place, sweetheart. Does this stuff look cheap to you?" Well, sweetheart, it does. It's a lesser film by Ed, for sure, and the whole production screams "poverty"; for some salacious padding, Ed even spliced in a burlesque sequence from another feature "Yes Sir, Mr Bones" by Z film specialist Ron Ormond (who, by no coincidence, was Bela Lugosi's neighbor). And the muzak! The same "suspenseful" flamenco guitar line! It may drive you to a life of crime, if you're not there already, as we go cruising the streets of 1950s LA looking for Jail Bait.

First off I have to say that Jail Bait wasn't what I expected. Given its title I thought Jail Bait would be about the evils of having sex with minors. It certainly would have been in the Ed Wood tradition. But the Jail Bait here is the weapon that our protagonist Clancy Malone was carrying.

Malone is an irresponsible young punk, son of Dr. Herbert Rawlinson who likes hanging out with hoods like Timothy Farrell. He's already been picked up for gun possession and he's the cause of grief for Rawlinson and sister Dolores Fuller.

But one night Malone and Farrell pull a stickup at a theater and retired cop Bud Osborne is killed who is employed as a night watchman. The police in the people of Lyle Talbot and Steve Reeves investigate this one like Osborne was still on active duty.

This is as far as I go, the film takes some bizarre twists that only the mind of an Ed Wood could conceive.

When I say Steve Reeves that is indeed the original Hercules. And of course Ed Wood had him take his shirt off. He bulked up a bit in the 4 years since for the Hercules role.

As usual Wood shoots a most economical film. Players like Lyle Talbot, Herbert Rawlinson, and Bud Osborne who've got an impressive list of credits looked pained beyond belief. I'd love to know how Talbot got associated with Wood. Rawlinson died right after completing his part. He looks very ill in his scenes.

Jail Bait is an Ed Wood project through and through.

Two "hold-up boys," Don Gregor and Vic Brady, get caught in the act, and Gregor is forced to shoot an ex-police officer. Brady plays it cool, but Gregor insists that they turn themselves in. "We're cop killers. They don't like that," Gregor explains. Brady shoots him and hides his body behind a curtain in his kitchen.

Wishing to disappear to escape the police, Brady enlists the help of Gregor's father, a plastic surgeon who admits, "Plastic surgery, at times, seems to me to be very, VERY complicated." The surgeon shows up to give Brady his new face, but when he finds his son's dead body STANDING(???) behind a curtain in the kitchen, he decides to have a little fun with Brady instead. Two weeks later, Brady's bandages come off, and he's horrified to find whose face is underneath.

"Jail Bait," Ed Wood's attempt at gangster film noir, is unintentionally silly, ludicrous, and terribly enjoyable. And despite what Wade Williams says on the back of the DVD, the script is far from clever. Other highlights include: an embarrassing racist Vaudeville act(some versions replace this scene with a striptease show because it's apparently less offensive to degrade women as it is to degrade blacks) laughably inappropriate Spanish guitar score, and Dolores Fuller who is possibly the worst actress in history.

First of all, let me say that the title Jail Bait has to do with a gun and not under-age sex. This is one of Ed Wood's classics. Yes, it's horrible and the movie is so cheap it's funny. However, it's not as "good" as Plan 9.

Things to watch for:

The doctor's office. His desk is huge. When ever anyone wants to sit down, the have to squeeze between a plant and chair.

The music - it's horrible and ALWAYS playing. Even when someones parking a car the suspenseful guitar music begins strumming.

The doc performs plastic surgery in a guys living room! On his couch! At gun point!

Steve Reeves first movie - he takes his shirt off to prove it's him.

Worth the rental. The scenes in the theater (with the exception of a horrible and really kind of shocking black-face act thrown in for no reason at all) made me laugh out loud.

Many times, if I'm watching an Ed Wood movie and something inexplicable comes across the screen, I can usually take a deep breath and say to myself, "Well, at least I can see what he's *trying* to say." But when I was bludgeoned with an old Vaudvillian sketch in the middle of "Jail Bait" for seemingly no reason, I was speechless. This little nugget of racism, complete with Old-Tyme-White-Guy-In-Blackface-Talking-Like-A-Retarded-Bill-Cosby, took me completely by surprise. As if that weren't enough, he ends the bit by doing a shuffling Uncle Tom-ish song and dance number while wiggling a cigar up and down in his mouth in a very disturbing manner. Finally, I had seen something in and Ed Wood movie that I couldn't explain.

This scene is probably a good reason this film never ended up on MST3K. Though I must say that if it were cut from the film, it wouldn't change anything at all, except the audience would only have its intelligence insulted. Now, I'm not saying Ed Wood was a racist, but this scene does make it hard to recommend this movie to friends. Even those who enjoy bad movies.

Yes, it's inept directing, bad acting, illogical continuity etc. etc.

But it's fascinating! Everybody can do a cheap shot at Wood and repeat the degrading clichés but it is my impression that most people don't judge for themselves or play along for the ride. It's worth it. It is a fact that hallmarks of a "good movie" are: 1) it entertained you, 2) you remember it with enthusiasm. And it did both for me.

The music was so bold and different and had everything to do with creating the atmosphere in the film. I really liked it because I felt it worked for it's purpose. It gave the film it's very own identity.

I would anytime rather see an Ed Wood film than most of the Hollywood clichés poured out these days. I prefer Ed Wood for Steven Spielberg any day because you feel Wood does it for his own sake, not just to please the lowest denominator.

Not quite as bad as plan 9, but still extremely awful. The music stands out as exceptionally horrible, the worst thing about this movie, and that is saying something. Woods fans should certainly see this one.

After having watched "Jesse James meets Frankenstein's Daughter" I have to reevaluate Wood's classification as the worst director of all times. To be fair: the story is decent, has a nice twist at the end but it's just to long. It actually would have made a pretty good 40-50 minutes TV film. The acting is just about okay but for Ed Wood it's the pinnacle of Thespian art. It's all surprisingly normal, not even funny. But the soundtrack is positively weird, a Spanish guitar soloist, playing the same tune throughout the film. And you get the occasional actor bumping into doors. However, given the fact that Ed had no previous experience, I have to say that the film actually does show some promise. So it's interesting to watch, 15 minutes shorter and it would be a reasonably good b-movie.

'Jail Bait' is somewhat lesser known Ed Wood 's movie. Probably because it is slightly better than his most famous works. The dialogue is ridiculously written and actors chewing themselves through the silly lines thus destroying acting with every scene. Weird jump cuts in an inappropriate moments that doesn't add anything to scene but just demolishing the flow of it. 'Jail Bait' has much more coherent story line and consistent script than we are used from Ed Wood movie. That can be associated to co-writer Alex Gordon (who also produced couple of Roger Corman's movies). Thanks to tight writing 'Jail Bait' is more serious in tone and offers less unintentional comedy and as that it just stays a badly made film-noir, but stands as 'best' film directed by infamous Ed Wood.

The film's score with its pseudo flamenco guitar and obnoxious piano pounding takes off lot of tension from several scenes and adds some weird atmosphere to the movie. The mood of otherworldly is enhanced by that, that all the action takes place at night time and we see California without sunshine - dark and murky place instead of bright scenery we are used to.

'Jail Bait' has its charm and it is entertaining to watch wooden actors sleepwalking through bad dialogue and unbelievable procedures (plastic surgery done on the living room sofa without almost no medical equipment). The viewer also gets awarded with nice ending twist. Not quite Ed Wood at his best, but more at his 'best'.

This film occupies the difficult middle ground between the "Ed Wood" style of film making and just mediocre film making. It's definitely his best work (although that's not saying much). There's a coherent, if simple, plot, and Wood even goes in for a (predictable) twist ending. The acting is what you would expect from an Ed Wood movie, the music is stock (and terrible and repetitive), and the direction is poor, however it's the plot of this movie that sets it apart from his other films. This plot is coherent, and actually makes sense. Unfortunately, this is not quite enough to save this film. In the end, this films quality proved its undoing: it's not good enough to enjoy for its own merit, but it's not really bad enough to laugh at either. However, anyone with any interest in Ed Wood should watch it, just to see what he is capable of.

Those in search of Jeff Epstein hijinks will be sorely disappointed by this standard Ed Woods Jr. travesty in which the "bait" is not a high schooler but a gun. Displaying the same sloppy, barely coherent style to be found in all of his work the title hook is the sharpest thing about this movie.

Donny Gregor is the spoiled punk son of a famed plastic surgeon. Instead of admiring his father he's influenced by unctuous thug Vin Brady who is leading Gregor down a felonious path of destruction. A less than titanic struggle ensues between Brady and Gregor's father and sister in which the boy's survival hinges.

Auteur of awful Woods needs to be approached in a different way than other directors. Having helmed what many reviewers have called the worst film of all time (Plan 9 from Outer Space), you settle in for a display of bad acting, poor editing and end to end mess en scene. Piling absurdity upon absurdity the entertainment is in witnessing the audacity of Woods pasting all this inanity together and selling it to the public. In it's own way Jail Bait does not disappoint in the least.

Hi, Everyone, So you need a new face and you know a guy who has a little black bag... Before we analyze whether this movie is great or just really good, let's mention Herbert Rawlinson who plays the Plastic Surgeon, Dr. Gregor. He does a good job here. He is in the 1954 movie looking quite healthy. He died in 1953 of lung cancer. He was born in 1885. He was 68 but he looked more like 58. Not only was this movie released after his death, but there were some movies released in 1966, 13 years after his death, in which he was credited with an acting role. Check his page here at IMDb and you will see one of the longest lists of movie credits ever to exist anywhere.

With him in this film we see a young, sexy Steve Reeves showing his tummy in one shirtless scene. Steve does an OK job with little dialog. It is obvious in his scenes he is too good looking to be just a minor player. He, of course, became much better known just shortly after this movie was released when he appeared in his Hercules movies as the top dog.

The sets are decorated by what would now seem to be 99 Cent Store motif. The opening credits mention who supplied the "Knitwear," "Ladies' Suits," "Dresses," "Lingerie" and the locations which included the Monterey Theatre in Monterey Park, Ca. and The Hunter Inn in Temple City, Ca. Today's product placement units would be hard pressed to do a better job.

The plot line is excellent. The acting is not good, but fun to watch. This movie beats anything Hollywood is now offering. The focus here is on the criminal and his desire to beat the rap and also the cop who is going to bring the offender to justice. The police drive 1954 Nash sedans. There is also a Rambler convertible and a 1951 Chevy that are featured.

The swimming pool scene at the end could be used to lead into a second feature of "Sunset Blvd." which seems to start where this one ends. It would have been fun to have watched Steve Reeves at this age playing in Sunset Blvd. opposite Gloria Swanson. Not that Bill Holden wasn't good, just that Steve looked like a boytoy at the time and it would have been a daring casting choice.

Ed Wood understood what was needed in a movie. He did not waste a lot of money just to get his scenes. He had the co-operation of several police departments in Southern California when he made this. They are also credited and my guess is they are actually used in many scenes as extras and one liner actors.

If you want great sound and color and big names, this ain't it. If you want to have a movie that has a little historical significance try this one. It is safe for all ages if you don't mind lots of gunfire.

Tom Willett

Muddled mess about a gangster drawing a nice young kid into a life of crime. His family and the police try to help him to no avail. Then he kills a cop and things really go crazy. The ending is so bad and ridiculous that I loved it!

I saw this at a theatre years ago on a twin bill with "Plan 9 from Outer Space". This is even worse than "Plan 9" but also funnier! This one has a more coherent story and (for a Wood film) some high production values. The acting is terrible--the worst are Dolores Fuller, Lyle Talbot and Steve Reeves (yes THAT Steve Reeves). The dialogue is terrible (no surprise) but it's quite amusing to see this talentless cast sputter out some truly stupid lines. By the end of the film the audience I saw it with was laughing and yelling back at the screen! There were two big reactions in my audience--when Steve Reeves is shown with his shirt off (VERY impressive) there were wolf whistles from guys and girls, and when someone was rolling on the ground near a pool the audience was saying (in seconds), "Fall into the pool!" They were not disappointed and everybody burst into applause!

I actually think this is one of the best bad/good films Wood ever did. It's a textbook example of how NOT to do a movie but it's still a lot of fun! I give it a 7. Oh yes--the title has no bearing in the film whatsoever!

Clancy Malone (as Don Gregor) is an "over 21" juvenile delinquent; he carries an illegal gun, gets arrested, is bailed out, and helps pal Timothy Farrell (as Vic Brady) commit burglaries. Mr. Malone's father Herbert Rawlinson (as Boris Gregor) is a very successful plastic surgeon; later, his skill comes in handy. Blonde Dolores Fuller (as Marilyn Gregor) is a concerned sister. Lawmen Lyle Talbot (as Inspector Johns) and Steve Reeves (as Bob Lawrence) investigate the unfortunate circumstances surrounding Malone's criminal escapades.

Strong competition for worst performance honors. The Spanish guitar is annoying. "Cotton Watts and Chick" perform the "blackface" act. First feature film for Herculean Reeves, who gets to appear shirtless in a scene. Last feature film for Mr. Rawlinson.

Not even good Wood.

* Jail Bait (1954) Edward D. Wood Jr. ~ Lyle Talbot, Dolores Fuller, Herbert Rawlinson