Crash of Moons

Excellent entertainment value when viewed as the MST3K version! Everyone is a hoot, and John Banner appears in a rare serious role as the ruler of one of the doomed planets. Don't forget to send a Bannergram. Oh, and don't forget to watch Manhunt in Space, as well.

I do like watching the classic serials of the 1940s and '50s what with their constant two-fisted action scenes and cliffhangers, although I'd never experienced the delights of ROCKY JONES, SPACE RANGER previously. CRASH OF MOONS is an example of three episodes of the popular TV series being stitched together to make a single movie.

And boy, is it a dog. It's a drawn out sci-fi movie that drags along in the doldrums for the entire running time, featuring a plot so slight that it barely holds the viewer's attention. The tale is about the titular pair of moons that have been sent out of orbit and are on a collision course with an inhabited planet. Rocky and his team (including a woman, a kid, and a bizarre old professor guy who might as well sit around smoking a pipe) go to help them evacuate, but the planet's stupid queen wants nothing to do with it.

I associate these kinds of serial and TV shows with plenty of action and excitement, but CRASH OF MOONS is sorely lacking in that department. There are lots and lots of shots of spaceships landing and docking in which the ships look like they've been drawn on the screen or perhaps animated with a piece of cardboard. Even worse, there are only a couple of fight scenes, and attempts to generate any kind of suspense fall flat. The queen and her people are so unlikeable and stupid in behaviour that you wish the moons would crash on to them and kill them all. Add in a stolid hero and cheap production values and you have CRASH OF MOONS, an entirely dated sci-fi outing.

There's not really that much wrong with Crash of the Moons. Basically it's a few episodes of Rocky Jones, Space Ranger merged into a film. It is extremely dated, however. Winky's treatment of Vena is a good example of this. One has to remember that it was geared to be shown to children in the 1950's. In this respect, it succeeds. If you like children's sci-fi from the 1950's, go ahead and take a look at it. You'll see John Banner in a pre-sgt. Schultz role. He does a pretty good job in it. All in all, I'd give it a 6 out of 10. Not great, but not bad.

I bought this movie for a couple of dollars at a "Clearance warehouse sale" one day when just looking around. The cover looked pretty good, (in colour), but the movie is B&W, (I wish they wouldn't try to trap us with coloured covers on B&W movies, but it's a common thing to look out for!).

When I watched it I was pleasantly surprised. It turned out to be better than I expected. I was disappointed that it was a B&W, but the effects are pretty good, certainly better than, say, "Invaders from Mars" which has crappy effects, and it is great to see John Banner in something else apart from Hogan's Heroes.

Overall, this movie isn't too bad for a B grade, and certainly worth the two dollars from a nostalgia point of view. It isn't my favourite sci-fi, but it's not my worst either. It's o.k.

This is a pretty standard example of the kind of 1950's sci-fi movie that, on the one hand, now comes across as thoroughly dated and often unintentionally funny, but that also has a certain charm, at least to those who can appreciate the genre. This is not a bad film of its kind, despite its deficiencies.

The "Crash of Moons" has to do with a pair of 'gypsy moons', one of which is inhabited, that are locked into an irregular orbit around each other (as one character helpfully describes it, 'like two children on a playground'), and that are headed for a collision with another inhabited moon. The 'United Worlds' sends Space Ranger Rocky Jones and his friends to save everybody. One of the moons (whose leader is John Banner, better known as Sergeant Schultz from "Hogan's Heroes") is quite cooperative, but the other world is ruled by an entertainingly mean-spirited queen who, for reasons that apparently satisfy her, would rather eliminate the Space Rangers than have their help.

Most of the characters are stereotypes, but the actors are not bad, and most of them seem to enjoy what they are doing, which gives it some real life most of the time. Some of the events and much of the jargon in the dialogue lack any plausibility, but the basic premise of the impending collision comes across pretty well, and creates some real interest. The direction could have been a lot better, because in many of the crises the tension is prematurely defused, but on the other hand there is usually enough going on to keep the viewer's interest. The 'special' effects are about what you would expect, but at least they're good for some chuckles.

This movie won't be of general interest today, but if you enjoy movies such as "Plan 9 From Outer Space", this one is worth a look. "Crash of Moons" is not nearly as uproariously inept (what movie is), but it will keep your attention and provide some light entertainment.