- Drunk: Waiter, I'm looking for a place to wash my hands.
- The Waiter: There's a room there marked 'Gentlemen'; but, don't let that stop you. You go right in.
- Schatzi: I think her stocks went down and there she was in Paris and didn't know how to say 'sell short' in French.
- Jean Lawrence: You know that I'm for you and I know that you're for me and there's no friends like old friends.
- Polaire: It's the three of us.
- Jean Lawrence: Against the men.
- Schatzi: [singing] Almost like old times...
- Dey Emery: Always together, thicker than thieves, and out for no good. I call them the three musketeers of riverside drive.
- Polaire: Faith.
- Schatzi: Hope.
- Jean Lawrence: Charity.
- Jean Lawrence, Polaire, Schatzi: Ta da!
- Boris Feldman: You should be on the stage.
- Jean Lawrence, Polaire, Schatzi: Oh, we've been.
- Polaire: Ladies of Follies.
- Jean Lawrence: What's Pops to you?
- Polaire: Well, he's my fiancé. Not that we're engaged or anything like that.
- Polaire: Have him bring along some nice friend of his who's fun who'd like to meet a nice girl who's fun too.
- Jean Lawrence: What's Pops to you?
- Polaire: Well, you wouldn't expect a nice girl like me to leave a kind, old gentleman like Pops sitting alone at the Metropolitan Club without a friend to call his own.
- Boris Feldman: You know what gives me more trouble than anything else in the world?
- Jean Lawrence: Well, it might be your income tax man and it might be your waistline.
- Schatzi: I never give advice except when I'm tight. So, I think you better take him up and do what he tells you.
- Schatzi: I don't see where that's taking advantage of me? She won't let me make her anything but notorious.
- Boris Feldman: She's promised to give me her hands. I did not say her hand. And I'm going to help to make them famous.
- Jean Lawrence: Oh, I'm hot. Oh, I wonder were my dress is? I did have a dress once. Pardon my appearance.
- Boris Feldman: I find it hard to.
- Jean Lawrence: Oh, this is the most wonderful couch in the world. Do you mind if I stay here?
- Boris Feldman: Just what do you want?
- Jean Lawrence: I want to take piano lessons.
- Dey Emery: Couldn't they have fallen inside your dress?
- Justin Emery: I think you better look.
- Jean Lawrence: Do you? All right, I will.
- Schatzi: Well, I'll help you.
- Jean Lawrence: No, thanks! No, I'll search myself. Now, watch closely, Mr. Emery. See that I don't pull any Houdini tricks.
- Schatzi: Where you been keepin' yourself?
- Jean Lawrence: Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies. Where's Polaire?
- Schatzi: Ask me any questions you want to, I can keep my trap shut.
- Jean Lawrence: Where's my dress? Where's my dress?
- Schatzi: A dress, more or less, never bothered you before.
- Jean Lawrence: When people have fun together, that's something, isn't it.
- Polaire: Sometimes I think that's all there is.
- Jean Lawrence: So do I... sometimes.
- Jean Lawrence: I'll change any habits of mine that don't suit you, the day you change your face for what I can stand.
- Polaire: You won't have to stand anything about me any more than I do about you, you poor blonde wop!
- Jean Lawrence: Don't you call me a blonde wop!
- Schatzi: Stop scrapping, both of you! She can't help it if she's Italian.
- Jean Lawrence: [a passenger has bumped her rear end as they are exiting the ship in New York] Will you kindly take your suitcase out of the small of my back?
- Passenger exiting liner: I beg your pardon. I didn't know it was the small of your back.
- Jean Lawrence: Well, you're a stranger to me, and that's the small of my back to you!
- Title card: [opening title card] Throughout the ages, half of the women of the world have been working women...
- Title card: [opening title card] and the rest of the women have been working men.
- Jean Lawrence: You gonna make me believe that I've bought $43 worth of liquor since I've been on this boat?
- Waiter: Oh, no, madame. These are only the drinks you haven't paid for yet.
- Jean Lawrence: Say, whatta you do?
- Boris Feldman: I play the piano.
- Jean Lawrence: Is that all?
- Boris Feldman: Well, I took tambourine lessons, but I gave them up when I was very young.
- Jean Lawrence: Oh, dear - a comic as well.
- Polaire: He happens to play a little better than anyone else in the world.