- [Ruggles and Prunella are looking at the rough and cluttered store space that Ruggles will use for his restaurant]
- Prunella Judson: It's a mess isn't it?
- Ruggles: It's wonderful.
- Prunella Judson: Well, I don't see anything wonderful about it.
- Ruggles: You don't?
- Prunella Judson: No.
- Ruggles: You don't? My father was a gentleman's gentleman... and his father before him. And from that heritage of service miraculously there comes a man. A person of importance, however small. A man whose decisions and whose future are in his own hands.
- Prunella Judson: It's wonderful, isn't it?
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: I say, do you believe in love at first sight?
- Nell Kenner: No. Do you?
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: No. That's why I'd like to stay for a while, if I may.
- [the Earl is telling Ruggles why he'll be going to America with the Flouds]
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: His wife took quite a fancy to you... and, uh, so they... won you.
- Ruggles: Won me, m'lord?
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: Oh, yes, yes, yes. We were playing this game of drawing poker, you see, and it seems there's a thing called 'bluffing'. Though I say it, myself, I'm particularly good at it.
- Ruggles: Do I understand... that I was the stake, m'lord?
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: Oh, yes, yes, rather, yes. Yes, you see I didn't realize that they were bluffing, too. I, uh, I had three of the eights against a flush of clubs. So you really only lost by one eight.
- Ruggles: Indeed, m'lord.
- Earl of Burnstead, aka George: Oh, yes. I do hope you don't think I didn't lose you gamely as a gentleman should.
- Ruggles: Oh, no. Always bring the pot to the kettle - never bring the kettle to the pot.
- Prunella Judson: Listen, Colonel, I've been making tea for longer than I can remember.
- Ruggles: Don't let's get into difficulties about this. But you must listen to an Englishman about tea. If it were coffee I should be your pupil. Where making tea - and WHEN making tea - always bring the pot to the kettle and NEVER bring the kettle to the pot.
- Prunella Judson: Oh, Colonel, your knowledge is surprising.
- Egbert Floud: I ain't gonna have no English valet.
- Effie Floud: Oh, yes you are.
- Egbert Floud: No, I ain't! I got about as much use for one of them as a pig has for side pockets.
- Egbert Floud: [pouring champagne] What you want is... is... is... some more of this imprisoned laughter of the pleasant maids of France.
- Egbert Floud: You sit down and tell me now what's the matter. Come on.
- Prunella Judson: Oh, I don't see how they can go on having a good time... when maybe he's... oh, you know...
- Egbert Floud: He? Who? What are you talking about?
- Prunella Judson: Colonel Ruggles. I think he jumped in the river.
- Egbert Floud: No. Why should he wanna do that?
- Prunella Judson: Oh, on account of a woman. She treated him something awful.
- Egbert Floud: Who told you that?
- Prunella Judson: I was there.
- [Egbert is wearing a loud, checked suit]
- Effie Floud: Take off those clothes.
- Egbert Floud: No, sir, I won't do it! Effie, we might just as well have a showdown right here and now. What did Lincoln say at Gettysburg? Yeah, you don't know - well, I'll tell you. He said that all men are created equal. He didn't just mean a few men - he meant ALL men. And that includes me: I'm created equal.
- Effie Floud: Equal to what?
- Egbert Floud: Equal... equal to WHAT? Well, equal to... uh...
- Egbert Floud: [to Ma Pettingill] ... She changed the subject on me.
- Egbert Floud: [to Effie, recovering his train of thought] Men are created equal to women! That's why you have no right to order me around the way you do. Abe Lincoln said so.
- Effie Floud: He also said, "You can fool some of the people some of the time and All of the people some of the time." But you can't fool me, Egbert Floud, ANY of the time... you striped bass!
- Ruggles: I'm putting out your light grey, my Lord. There is something in the air this morning which calls for light grey, I think.