Things Like This

There's a rule in screenwriting that if you're going to have a character who's a bit extra/annoying/difficult, they need to do something unquestionably good early into the script, like saving a cat. That never happens for either of the two romantic leads. One is annoying, the other is slightly less annoying... and while I want more plus-size representation in queer cinema, certainly we can do better than this. Apart from making each other laugh, I never understood why either of them found the other attractive. I only realized that one of the actors who plays the romantic lead also wrote and starred in it when we got to the end. So... was this supposed to be some sort of fantasy about getting the hottie? But the thing is, the supposed "hottie" wasn't that attractive because he's such a jerk to the people around him. We can do better than this...

I'd like to first start off by stating that I am an obese gay man, married to a wonderful man, who I'd define as attractive by societal standards. I am happy and confident, both in myself and in my marriage. So after seeing so many hateful comments online about how "things like this would never happen in real life" (ironic, since this line is in the film and also part of the title), but were referring to that a "hot" guy would never be attracted to a fat guy, I felt compelled to go support this film. So my husband and I, and a group of friends bought tickets for the film.

It's important to first inform you that the lead role of the heavy set gay man, is performed by Max Talisman, who also wrote and directed the film. I preface this because for those of you who remember the film The Room, which was written by, directed by and starred Tommy Wiseau, I was constantly reminded of this during the viewing. Yes, the script was baffling, the jokes were cringe, and many of the performances, mostly by Talisman, were laughable. And Talisman's lead character was not only painful to watch on screen due to his shrill voice and high school theatre level acting skills, but he was also confusing to watch because he was written as a very unlikeable person, who is downright nasty to both his friends and strangers. And that's where I'd like to turn your attention to what comes across as unwarranted narcissism from Talisman the director, to which bleeds into the plot and the protagonist. Talisman's main character is unlikeable, rude, and awkward. He does nothing to deserve anyone's affection, and yet at one point in the movie, his love interests calls him charming. I couldn't see it. But the red carpet seems to roll out for Talisman's character throughout this cringe fest of cliche romance movie tropes that we've all seen a million times, and ultimately leads to, I'm not kidding you, a music number... Performed by... Wait for it... MAX TALISMAN. And his performance was equivalent to your drunk friend on karaoke night. The jokes, the cliches, the awkward exchanges, they all resulted in what could only feel like an undeserved narcissistic brag by Talisman, who wanted to show everyone that he could get love, the cute guy, and a musical number. This once again reflects back on Tommy Wiseau, who's narcissism pushed him to create a film, because he believed he could have it all, regardless of whether he earned any of these achievements.

I wanted to support an LGBT movie that was body positive, but this was not it. The fact that Talisman's character kept his shirt on during a love scene, while his "hot" love interest was shirtless only supports my argument that Talisman's supposed confidence in the film is a false narrative. Strangely enough, they also make subtle references to Talismans character having an eating disorder, but then never address it again. There were many unexplained odd moments in this film like this, again reminding me of The Room (if you remember the scenes with the strange flower shop owner, or the mother addressing her cancer and then never referencing it again, this film had similar moments).

I do want to give credit where it's due. Joey Pollari stands out in this film as acting well beyond the shallow script he had to work with. His performance may have just made watching this film survivable.

I'd like to end this review by hoping that this film actually gets more attention, because I believe it has the potential for being a cult classic due to how bad it is. We all laughed throughout the entire film, it even brought me to tears. And in the words of one of the 'best friend' characters: "This is not a dollar store romance novel".... Oh honey, it's on the discount rack.

As a big guy, I've always found the whole idea of finding true love pretty awkward and sometimes even frustrating. It's not often you see stories that feel like they really get that - the messy, imperfect, and honest parts of connecting with someone. That's why Things Like This really hit home for me.

The movie follows two guys, both named Zack, who meet by chance, and what unfolds feels so natural and genuine. Their awkwardness, the small stumbles, and the way they slowly figure each other out felt incredibly real. It's not one of those overly polished romantic comedies where everything falls into place perfectly. Instead, it embraces that imperfect, human quality that makes you root for them even more.

The humor in the movie landed perfectly too - I found myself laughing out loud at times, but it also had these quiet, sincere moments that stuck with me emotionally. It's that kind of balance that makes the story feel honest, without being cheesy or forced.

I also really appreciated how the city was portrayed - it wasn't trying too hard to be quirky or artsy. Instead, it felt like a lived-in space that added warmth and familiarity to the story.

If you're looking for a movie that's light, heartfelt, and relatable, especially if you've ever felt awkward or unsure in love, Things Like This is worth checking out. It's one of those rare films that feels honest about the messiness of human connection, and I'm really glad I saw it.

Love is for everybody, and the film industry doesn't always show that - it has seemed like the only people who can find love are those who are skinny and straight and classically beautiful. No matter who you are, seeing someone who does not fit the traditional profile in a love story is transformative. Representation allows for everyone to feel like they can fit in any role - if they can be the romantic leads, I can be anything I want to be too.

The script was very funny, and the characters were heartwarming - except the Tony-nominated Taylor Trensch, who was hilariously awful (and uneducated about narwhals!) and Eric Roberts, whose disdain for his own child sent ripples through the audience when I saw it in theaters. Go see this movie - you deserve it.

Okay... so the premise was promising but this just really missed the mark. The writing was bad at times and the pacing of the movie felt so rushed and the "obstacles" or lake there of was hard to understand why they were in the positions they were in. Max's Zach is such a horrible person to everyone around him. Max did write and direct the film so making him own character this unlikable was a bold choice. His acting was very middle school theater performance. However, can we talk about joeys performance? He was brilliant and was the standout of the film and did an amazing job with the horrible script he was given. I won't say much more to not spoil anything but I do have to ask why someone didn't ask for a rewrite on some scenes.