Quotes

Outlaw Johnny Black

Bessie Lee: [Seeing shirtless Johnny] Holy-lujah! Umm... I brought you something for you to put in your mouth this morning. Everybody loves my hot buns. So I thought I'd come over here and give you some. Figured it's been a long time since you had any... I uh, I covered them up, to keep them hot, steamy, firm, moist. Just the way a man likes. I've also got warm honey and warm cream, you can pour on, lick off, drench and splatter all over everything. If you like. Believe me, I don't mind...
Outlaw Johnny Black: [Getting on his knees] I hope you don't mind, I just feel obliged to bless the food, something's just come over me.
Bessie Lee: Ooh. Just come over me too. Let me set these buns down and I'll get right down on my knees...
Outlaw Johnny Black: No no no Bessie, you just stay on up, and you just go on and start without me.
Bessie Lee: You don't know my appetite. I'll have that whole thing down my throat, cream and all before you can even...
Outlaw Johnny Black: Bessie Bessie Bessie, could you just start without me and, and stop talking?

Outlaw Johnny Black: He's actually Deacon Deacon Deacon... the third. From a long line of Deacons... . named Deacon... who were Deacons.

Big Chief: We gather under Herb of Life tree for wedding of my daughter Paw Paw, which means "tiny tree". Right here is Oak Tree. She's a goddamned Sequoia! Look how beautiful she is.

Outlaw Johnny Black: Do that shit again, I'm gonna shoot your nuts off alphabetically.
Crackshot Bob: I'm Crackshot Bob!
Outlaw Johnny Black: Well now you just shot.

Elmer: Storm is a-comin'! Men, women, children, all we have is our hands, and our feet to walk. Rain comes down, and it ain't gonna go back up. Uh-uh. And all the while we know that the boll weevil don't change. But we can. Can you? Are you a boll weevil? That's right. And it don't matter what the book says. It's not about what you have in your pocket! Uh-uh! It's what your pocket has in you! It ain't the man who milks the cow! Uh-uh! But the cow that milks the man! And what's that cow gonna tell me?
[Crowd saying 'moo']
Elmer: That's right! But we know that the answer is deeper than that! Ooh I gotta pee. Yep yep yep I gotta pee this very instant.
Brett Clayton: Margie, Cheryl, would you tend to my brother please?
Outlaw Johnny Black: [Thinking Elmer is Jessie] That's Jessie Lee?
Old Man: Sure is! Best thing that ever happened to this town! Pretty and smart as a whip! The Lord worked overtime when he made her!
Outlaw Johnny Black: Her?
Old Man: Yeah!
Outlaw Johnny Black: Who, well who's the...
Old Man: That's her brother Elmer. He got kicked in the head by a mule. Ain't been right ever since.

Outlaw Johnny Black: I wasn't... who you was with!
Bessie Lee: Are you saying that I don't know who I'm sleeping with in the house of the Lord?
Outlaw Johnny Black: Exactly!

Jessie Lee: I say a life worth living is a life worth defending! Who's with me?
[Congregation looks around awkwardly and the mayor clears his throat]
Jessie Lee: Who's with me?
Sister Betty: I, I'm still trying to find a man, I ain't had no man in...
Mayor Williams: Now when you say "who is with me," does that refer to... who?
[Indicating the congregation]
Sister Betty: Gotta milk a cow...
Mayor Williams: You probably don't know this, but I have brittle bones like a bird. If I throw a punch and I could crack my spine.
Sherriff Yarbrough: And my knees...
Sister Betty: I ain't had no children. I still got good children bearing years left.
Sherriff Yarbrough: My knees is shot!
Mayor Williams: They'll buckle. They'll, they'll bend backwards, also like a bird! Ever seen a bird walk with backward knees?
Sister Betty: I was thinking about going to the saloon...
Mayor Williams: I suggest the lighter skinneded ones of us go first.

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