Review by McQualude

Bikini Girls on Ice tries to be a throwback to 80's slashers but lacks atmosphere, nudity, gore or a credible killer. I can live with the girls being terrible actors, clearly they were hired for their ability to wear a bikini but their characters were unlikable and dumb. Likewise, all the male characters except one are unlikable and dumb. The story, thin as it is, doesn't make any sense. The killer, played by William Jarand, kept making weird grunting sounds and was just not menacing. Maybe if this were edited down to 60 minutes it would be watchable, maybe slightly enjoyable, but there is just too much fluff. Slashers were a genre of their time, difficult to replicate these days.