I paid twenty bucks for this?
This is a terrible movie. It just sluggishly plods along, subjecting us to annoying characters, until it reaches its ridiculous end.
The story is insipid and the editing atrocious. (The scene with the Jeep and tree goes on far too long, extinguishing any tension or morbid humour the scene might have had otherwise.) There is an amusing bit, involving a hole in a floor; that scene, with the wonderful stupidity of the characters involved, is the closest the film ever gets to matching the original in terms of gore and humor.
Isaac Hayes seems to be cast only for the joke of being billed as "The Chef," and then disappears after three short scenes. His character serves no other function (unless we needed a black guy to say "motherf*cker" to liven things up a bit.) There is no mystery as to the killer's identity once all of the main characters are established. Alan, who for some unfathomable reason is the film's lead character, is so irritating that his quick death would have perhaps made the film tolerable. However, there he is, in scene after scene, in filthy clothing, telling people that their ass stinks, and then throwing himself pity parties because the other kids don't like him. (Think of Shelly from "Friday the 13th: Part III" but with none of his sympathetic aspects, only the annoying ones, multiplied by ten, and with body odor and a mean streak, and there is your Alan.) (I thought that at least his "your ass stinks" line would serve some purpose, some foreshadowing regarding his or another character's death - death by stinky ass! - but no, it's just his cringe-inducing recurring line, as lacking in purpose as Isaac Hayes' role.) Any fan of the original is going to want - to HAVE - to see this. Just don't blow $20 of your own money on it.
The story is insipid and the editing atrocious. (The scene with the Jeep and tree goes on far too long, extinguishing any tension or morbid humour the scene might have had otherwise.) There is an amusing bit, involving a hole in a floor; that scene, with the wonderful stupidity of the characters involved, is the closest the film ever gets to matching the original in terms of gore and humor.
Isaac Hayes seems to be cast only for the joke of being billed as "The Chef," and then disappears after three short scenes. His character serves no other function (unless we needed a black guy to say "motherf*cker" to liven things up a bit.) There is no mystery as to the killer's identity once all of the main characters are established. Alan, who for some unfathomable reason is the film's lead character, is so irritating that his quick death would have perhaps made the film tolerable. However, there he is, in scene after scene, in filthy clothing, telling people that their ass stinks, and then throwing himself pity parties because the other kids don't like him. (Think of Shelly from "Friday the 13th: Part III" but with none of his sympathetic aspects, only the annoying ones, multiplied by ten, and with body odor and a mean streak, and there is your Alan.) (I thought that at least his "your ass stinks" line would serve some purpose, some foreshadowing regarding his or another character's death - death by stinky ass! - but no, it's just his cringe-inducing recurring line, as lacking in purpose as Isaac Hayes' role.) Any fan of the original is going to want - to HAVE - to see this. Just don't blow $20 of your own money on it.
- davitalvitch
- Jan 11, 2009