Smelly Pants, smelly pants
I'd spent the Saturday night awake, chatting to friends online, and so consequently I was feeling a little tired on Sunday morning. I was staying at a friend's house so there were two of us crashed in his room in front of the computer. We switched the TV on and crashed about 15-20 minutes into this movie.
At first I thought that the movie was a creation of my own tired, over-imaginative mind; OK this is a dream, I'm dreaming this, I can handle this, I ought to lay off the peanut M&Ms.
But no. The more we watched, the more I realized this was real. Very real.
Hulk Hogan was Hulk Hogan, usually sporting a wry little smile that suggested to me "yes I know this film is pants, I'm not taking it seriously". Robert Vaughn was trying desperately to act (doing rather well too). The remainder of the cast (yes Grace Jones, I'm mainly thinking of you) would probably have failed an audition for a Nativity Play on this performance.
But it doesn't stop there. Maybe because we didn't see the start but all kinds of plot lines didn't appear to make sense, nothing seemed to follow on from each other, I never felt any tension in the movie and upon watching the scene near the end with Grace Jones water skiing (?) onto the beach I was left wondering ... "WHY???". The dialogue was pretty poor [IMDB lists no "memorable quotes" which in this case would also make a good plot summary].
I'm left with the general thought of "why was this movie made", except as an example on how not to make a movie.
Closing thoughts. It is the worst movie I have ever seen (and I saw "Robocop 3" at the cinema!), I can't explain it any more than I already have done, you will never complain about movies again. That alone makes this movie a "Must See"!!
It is August. I'm hoping they go on to show "Santa with Muscles" at Christmas.
At first I thought that the movie was a creation of my own tired, over-imaginative mind; OK this is a dream, I'm dreaming this, I can handle this, I ought to lay off the peanut M&Ms.
But no. The more we watched, the more I realized this was real. Very real.
Hulk Hogan was Hulk Hogan, usually sporting a wry little smile that suggested to me "yes I know this film is pants, I'm not taking it seriously". Robert Vaughn was trying desperately to act (doing rather well too). The remainder of the cast (yes Grace Jones, I'm mainly thinking of you) would probably have failed an audition for a Nativity Play on this performance.
But it doesn't stop there. Maybe because we didn't see the start but all kinds of plot lines didn't appear to make sense, nothing seemed to follow on from each other, I never felt any tension in the movie and upon watching the scene near the end with Grace Jones water skiing (?) onto the beach I was left wondering ... "WHY???". The dialogue was pretty poor [IMDB lists no "memorable quotes" which in this case would also make a good plot summary].
I'm left with the general thought of "why was this movie made", except as an example on how not to make a movie.
Closing thoughts. It is the worst movie I have ever seen (and I saw "Robocop 3" at the cinema!), I can't explain it any more than I already have done, you will never complain about movies again. That alone makes this movie a "Must See"!!
It is August. I'm hoping they go on to show "Santa with Muscles" at Christmas.
- barefoot_sandwell
- Aug 1, 2004