It's Just Missing a Monster to be Classically Bad
With out a doubt this is one of the worst Sword and Sandal films ever made. Its absolutely stuck in the 1960's bad movie style that it was made and will never rise again except as something that the Mystery Science 3000 crew might rip apart.
Who made this? Can we stop them from ever doing it again?
The movie begins with and island blowing up and Maciste saving some of the inhabitants on his raft. If your jaw isn't hanging down around your knees by the time they have set sail you obviously haven't been paying attention. From there the group ends up on another island where two warring peoples are duking it out.
Did I say Island? Think Bavaria or the Alps, or somewhere with Vikings and Indians...and caves and...
Don't ask. Please don't, I lost the ability to speak when the island blew up and I don't know when I will be able to speak.
This is either a movie that will clear a room or fill it depending on how those in the room feel about picking on a really bad movie. This is a movie that must go on the list of all time clunkers- a talk backers treasure trove of stupid actions and dialog.
Frankly the only thing missing from making this the perfect bad movie, or the shining example of bad Sword and Sandal movie, is the fact that there is no monster. If this movie had a really bad monster of the rubber, or furry suit variety this would be perfect cheese... and a stuffed lion or tiger for someone to wrestle with...that would truly make it a perfect sit at home with friends and pick on the movie movie.
Under no circumstances watch this alone, it could prove deadly. I mean honestly, if you tried to watch this straight your brain would boil and you'd end up locked away in a padded cell and straight jacket until you die, because frankly its just that bad.
One out of ten, only because I can't go lower.
Who made this? Can we stop them from ever doing it again?
The movie begins with and island blowing up and Maciste saving some of the inhabitants on his raft. If your jaw isn't hanging down around your knees by the time they have set sail you obviously haven't been paying attention. From there the group ends up on another island where two warring peoples are duking it out.
Did I say Island? Think Bavaria or the Alps, or somewhere with Vikings and Indians...and caves and...
Don't ask. Please don't, I lost the ability to speak when the island blew up and I don't know when I will be able to speak.
This is either a movie that will clear a room or fill it depending on how those in the room feel about picking on a really bad movie. This is a movie that must go on the list of all time clunkers- a talk backers treasure trove of stupid actions and dialog.
Frankly the only thing missing from making this the perfect bad movie, or the shining example of bad Sword and Sandal movie, is the fact that there is no monster. If this movie had a really bad monster of the rubber, or furry suit variety this would be perfect cheese... and a stuffed lion or tiger for someone to wrestle with...that would truly make it a perfect sit at home with friends and pick on the movie movie.
Under no circumstances watch this alone, it could prove deadly. I mean honestly, if you tried to watch this straight your brain would boil and you'd end up locked away in a padded cell and straight jacket until you die, because frankly its just that bad.
One out of ten, only because I can't go lower.
- dbborroughs
- Apr 16, 2004