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... of course, it's mandatory for Canadian and American productions to not do any homework, making anything 'foreign' not even remotely correct or authentic. I think it's so ridiculous and insulting for the many thousands of British actors that Canadians were used to portray all Brits. Accents weren't terrible but still cringe. I know it's just a fun film, not a serious portrayal of a royal's life, but almost nothing about etiquette and how things go is anywhere near reality (including royal estates not being decorated in tacky plastic, even when in tacky America). Also, a duke isn't necessarily royal. Possible, though. Also, "You have Christmas trees growing on your property?!" is my new silliest line in a film. They're not called Christmas trees. They're pines or firs of whichever takes your fancy, but they only become Christmas trees when decorated in your home. And of course, my pet peeve with basically all American and surprisingly also Canadian Christmas films: we are able to operate on babies in utero these days, but somehow making artificial snow look real is impossible for these production companies.

Luckily, it does have some heart and even though it's of course predictable, it's also a fun angle.

Horribly fake looking fake snow is a pet peeve so that put me off straight away. But my tolerance expands a little for Christmas films so I kept watching. But it was too much. So much unnecessary fakery. The photos of her and her former husband were fake, photoshopped. Why on earth would you do that, with a million male actors and models around? And then... medical notes that are clearly meant to look handwritten but are printed in a very well-known font. But the worst, by faaaar the worst, is the objectifying. The double standard is genuinely worrying. If this were the other way around, with a half naked woman running around in the street, making push moves against a car, and a group of 50+ men making almost-coming noises over her, it would be cancelled in no time. But when it's a man, objectifying him and making him act like his iq is 67 and he merely exist to be pretty, it's ok? (for the record - I'm a woman) I genuinely don't understand the people who loved this. I'm so ready to lower my expectations and enjoy a fun, fantasy Christmas film about a snowman coming to life, truly. In other hands, that could have looked much better, more realistic even, even though it's fiction. Like Big vibes. But no. It's juvenile and cheap, in my opinion. No idea why - isn't Hallmark a company that should be able to afford big, big budgets? Highlight: Jack's face when Kathy bites off the head of a snowman cookie. But I stopped watching after that.

I don't even know where to start. Given the premise and trailer, I knew this wasn't going to be an intellectual treasure, but I thought it was just what I was looking for - a fun, predictable distraction. I was indeed distracted, but by all the wrong things. So many talented people who I've watched do so many great things... and then you can't get a superficial romcom right? I mean, even Zac Efron can do much more authentic-feeling acting. Of course we all know we shouldn't be judging on looks, but I will admit that I found many things distracting. The daughter looks not old enough to have a job as a pa, let alone producer, the AI version of David Hasselhoff is a lot to get used to, Nicole's hair is yellow and her mouth does odd things.

But the worst is the actual content, of course. Zac's character's behaviour is appalling but of course, all women fall for it and nobody really calls him out for it until the film's almost over. I know it's a film, so technically I can't say "If a guy said those arrogant things he'd get a slap in the face", but in real life, he would. Nicole's character says no to meeting him but he refuses to accept a no and of course is proven right by her showing up anyway. A 24-year-old daughter behaving like a spoiled 14-year-old and then threatening to move out... yes, you're 24, please do! All the women the same, stressing about their looks, fretting over every dress in the wardrobe, tiny women saying they're too boxy and big, Zara having her hair straight in the last few scenes because apparently that makes you look more grown-up... oh dear. Is that really how we want women portrayed? Or worse... is this really how many women are? Speaking of which: all the women laying against each other, stroking each other's hair... all the people who do that with their mothers, daughters and friends are not my people.

A story about the daughter being 7 and making her mother carry her "all the way up the Eiffel Tower", implying an average person can actually carry a heavy child up 1665 steps... when the Eiffel Tower has lifts. Really? A good-looking, sexual woman her age did not have anyone else in 11 years? Really? Her new book is called Second Time Around - have we not evolved since the Sex and the City scene about the cliché self help books? Why are we pretending she's much younger, for example with exclamations/jokes about her being in kindergarten when she had her daughter? Nicole is 57, Joey is 24, making it a relatively late but still normal 33 when she had her. Are they doing this because they deem it impossible for people with a 20-year age gap to fall in love?

And why was a film with Christmas and winter playing a big part, with at least one Christmas song in it, released in summer? Christmas is the only time we make allowances for films of this caliber.