Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance

This was the most disappointing I have seen since birdemic 2, In fact it makes birdemic 2 look good so to speak.

I love bad movies and love the greats such as The room, things, birdemic, troll 2, high kicks, double down, road to revenge, hawkeye, double down, Miami connection and many more and also samurai cop part 1. I love the unintentional badness the sincerity of these films that think they are masterpieces (and are in a certain aspect). Then come movies like this! First the good things about this movie is a most of the main cast return which is a great bonus for fans and my main reason for the stars. Now the bad part, most of the main cast return to appear in this mess of a movie instead of a great movie that should have been made. Gone is the cheesy vibe and terrible camera work and lines, now make way for more boring futuristic tripe with decent camera work and something that falls flatter than a hedgehog on the side of a road. The story makes no sense, the music is awful, the lines are awful, the characters even the old characters are awful they are so boring. I hated the new look the whole movie had and the comic book vibe it gave like the movie was made by annoying comic book nerds who make things all about futuristic weapons and over the top nonsense and pointless characters posing as real cool or trendy villains not the cheesy type but the cliché pointless type.

If you are a fan of the original do yourself a favour avoid this I made an account especially to air the disappointment I felt for the film. It was great to bring back the old characters for the fans but it was an insult to make this garbage which tries way too hard to actually be a good film with a stupid complex plot, if I want a complex plot I will watch an actual well made movie I want to turn my brain off with a movie like this not have it shut off by the actual movie into a coma.

Like many of you reading this review, I am one of those special individuals who enjoys watching bad movies because of the non intentional hilarity factor involved. A movie which has a cast and director who actually try to make a good movie but are not aware nor can cope with their lack of expertise, budget or comprehension of a proper film can have gut wrenching laughs.

Now enter the Samurai Cop 2. Building up from its cult following and the internet movement of glorifying old bad movies, it invested some money into creating a sequel to satisfy rabid fans. Now the problem is that the movie is too self aware about what's going on. The first film had an amateur director with big dreams leading a cast of actors who where desperately trying to build their acting portfolios and then suddenly everything crashed and burned. The second seems like it was trying too hard to re-create the tragic magic it had from the first film and instead of making a movie so bad its good, its just a terrible film. The cast and crew came into this movie knowing it was nothing special and it ends up being just that.

First off we can talk about the story. I have yet to figure out what the hell was going on. At first it seemed to make sense. Losing a loved one caused samurai cop to go into hiding. There's a clan war between two large gangs and they need him back to stop the impending chaos. After that you get random scenes of flash backs, poorly executed action scenes and reused meditation sequences of samurai cop on the beach. I know the story wasn't the main attraction but it created this vortex in which the more you tried to follow it the more you got lost in what was going on. It got to the point where you couldn't focus on the jokes because your brain was too warped from the messed up information it just received.

The actors that were in the film weren't great either, which is to be expected because they brought back many of them that were in the first film. The new characters consisted of porn stars and Tommy Wiseau to cater to those who enjoy gratuitous nudity and The Room. I am one of those people so that's where one of the stars from my rating is derived. I enjoyed Kayden Kross' performance and it's quite sad that her acting was better than most on set. Her black wig made her look like Jill Valentine...mmhhhmm...anyways back to the review.

The interior sets were poorly done consisting of reused basement rooms and decorated basement rooms to simulate places such as bars, clubs and building complexes. The colour scheme they used was really bright which almost rivaled tron for its neon use. They said they used the kickstarter money for special effects but it looks like basic animations and sfx that come free with a low end video editing software. They really screwed kickstarter backers if they spent 50k on elementary school cgi work.

The music was the other reason for the second star for this review. I enjoyed it and it set the mood quite well and hit the right notes to move you through the poorly acted scenes.

All in all I give this movie a 2 out of 10 starz rating. I would not recommend this film. They ruined perfectly good memories of the first bad film and didn't even try hard to make a good film which would end up being unintentionally bad. They should have used the budget and kickstarter money to make a porn parody as they could've used the same cast, been more entertaining and cost less money.

Instead, they went too far to the direction of incomprehensible plot, too many pornstars trying to act, not enough Frank, poorly shot and choreographed fight scenes, and lack of understanding of what made the first one good. Shouldn't have tried to go sci-fi, should have kept it grounded and more buddy cop stuff, less rival gang nonsense. Majorly disappointed.

OK, so this movie is really bad,..... on purpose? I think yeah... (not sure?)... So this is in fact a great movie to watch drunk with friends for sure. Also on level with "The Room" ( and Tommy Wiseau is in it) Seriously the best/worst special fx (SNL style green screen) and uses video game noises for the punch and kick sounds. This movie is terrible, but good terrible. Give it a shot if you just really want a good laugh.Also you might want to use subtitles.

Oh and I forgot about the acting. It's just goes beyond unicorns and footballs ... "Oh hi Johnny" *stares "RED BLOOD!!! RED BLOOD JOHNNY!"

Just magical. Majestic even.

It's not funny. It's not nostalgic. It's not anything, really.

A spectacular example of hipster counterproductivity, this outrageous waste of time is really just a feature-length showcase of how much money & online hype can be flushed down the toilet by the utterly untalented.

There's no plot to give away, because nothing happens. It's just crap, stumbling from one nonsense "scene" to another, with a few little "nods" to the original along the way. I can't even think of words to describe the rest... bright colors? No attempts at continuity either, unless a small parade of lame cameos qualifies as such.

Maybe the most tragic - yet interesting - thing about this project is the increased appreciation this pile inadvertently lends to that first movie. At least Samurai Cop stumbled into accidental charisma here & there! That Amir guy must be turning in his grave.

I'd like to further skewer this trainwreck, but it's frankly just depressing.

Don't watch it. It blows.