Screamboat - Terror a Bordo

I'm pretty sure this movie had a budget of three dollars, seventy-five cents, and a stick of gum.

What were they thinking when they decided to make this cinematic mess-if we can even call it "cinematic"?

Honestly, I have no idea. Have people really lost their creative sense to this extent?

My review of the film:

It felt like I was watching a cheap movie from the 80s.

Oh my God, the effects!

The acting? I swear, it felt like the actors had zero experience. I don't even know where they found them-maybe at a Sunday flea market or something!

And the dialogue? Where do I even begin?

DDDVVVDDD.

There have been quite a few "children's movie character" horror adaptations in the meantime, but this was one of the worst.

After 45 minutes I didn't feel like watching any more, but I did watch it to the end.

There is absolutely no common thread or any kind of logic in this movie. The scenes are often wildly thrown together or strung together, often without sense or reason. The whole movie has neither wit nor tension and the actors are just as bad. Please, do everyone a favor and stop producing such "wannabe" horror movies that are just plain bad.

Even 4 stars is still too much for this crap! Two hours of wasted time!

I went to see Screamboat on opening night, and to my surprise, I actually kind of enjoyed it. I don't usually watch low-budget films in theaters, but the strong online marketing-along with the fact that Terrifier's David Howard Thornton was in it-pulled me in. I was also intrigued to see how they would take the story of Mickey Mouse's first cartoon and twist it into a horror film.

Having watched the Terrifier series last year, I had a pretty good idea of what I was getting into with Screamboat. While I generally enjoyed the story, the film had the feel of a '90s TV horror movie. That said, the setting was a highlight-being trapped on a slow-moving ferry added a real sense of claustrophobia and tension, making the characters' predicament feel even more desperate.

As for the cast, performances were a mix of good and bad. Some moments felt a bit cheesy and over-the-top, but I particularly enjoyed Allison Pittel and Jesse Posey as Selena and Pete. Their chemistry kept the film engaging and gave the audience characters to root for.

Director Steven LaMorte did a decent job bringing this low-budget horror film to the big screen. The gruesome kills and jump scares will definitely satisfy horror fans. However, there were a few drawbacks. Willie's costume design felt too amateurish and comical to be truly scary. Additionally, the film ran about 20 minutes too long-certain scenes felt repetitive and could have been trimmed to improve pacing.

Despite these issues, I was entertained from start to finish. Screamboat is far from perfect, but if you enjoy gory horror, it's worth a watch.

Final Rating: 5.5/10.

Wants to be Leprechaun but it's just a bad cash grab that barely resembles steamboat willy. Probably worst disney reimagining ive seen so far. I preferred snow white.. LOL It was painfully stupid and cliché cash grab but pretty enjoyable one at the end. I really liked David Howard Thorton performance - his Mr Bean - like mannerism once again makes these riddicoulus scenes work much better. It could 've been easily shorter tho - there is really no reason for something like this to last over 90 minutes. Some of the scenes feel drawn out and the acting really makes that apparent making it feel even more of a slog to get through. I get they want to be the next Winnie the Pooh film but I just don't see it with this. It's unimaginative and lacks any real creativity. Feels very low budget in all areas. Give these films better budgets!!

This film is passable, if you've seen the trailer or know what this is even about, you'll be getting exactly what you were probably expecting - a bunch of purposely expressive characters you'd wanna see killed in true slasher fashion. This is a goofy, extremely self aware film that delivers on just that - if you're expecting anything serious or anything on the aspect of plot that isn't purposely cliche, then you're not watching the right film. Some complaints lie with the pacing, as well as how rushed the end began feeling and looking. Some kills could have gone farther with the hype of people being behind Terrifier, but worry not, this film delivers in its own special take on that; filming in some spots feels jarring and even blurry, some cheap spots. Some genuinely good moments of laughs and self aware dark humor, along with some really fleshed out and decent scenes. This is much better than some other films in this joke wave, however it's far from anything spectacular or good. Memorable? A good film to watch with friends and even catch in theaters for an experience? Yes. This film is serviceable at the very least, I'd recommend if you know exactly what you're walking into - which you should.