Man has polluted the oceans for too long. Industrialisation and pollution have wrecked Earth's seas, and the planet's original inhabitants, the Sea Devils (you can stick the new name), have finally had enough - sending a strong mission to reclaim what's theirs. Earth's answer: Barclay. Yes... Barclay.
After the lacklustre run of 'Doctor Who' in recent years, there was genuine hope. We were spun a link to 'Children of Earth', out of sheer desperation it seems, because the framework may be similar but the quality certainly isn't.
I expected three things going in: a sermon on plastics, all boxes diligently ticked, and enough lingering shots of Tovey's biceps to qualify as a separate subplot. It didn't take long for every expectation not just to be fulfilled but driven home with the grace of someone trying to put an SD card back into a phone using a steam roller.
And then we hit the gripes. If Russell T Davies is still on the crusade about straight actors playing gay roles, it's a bit rich watching him do a full about-turn the moment it becomes inconvenient. Consistency seems to have left the building.
Then there's the Sea Devils themselves. I always understood them to be reptiles - classic series basics - not a shoal of mardy fish with attitude. If you're going to rebrand them as "homo aqua", at least get the species right. We now have fish instead of reptiles.
The budget is ever-present, and I'll admit some shots look terrific, but for all the money thrown at the screen, the storyline just wandered off somewhere and never came home.
And that name - honestly, has Russell been dipping into Acorn Antiques? There's a scene where Miss Babs asks Derek about his new girlfriend: "What was her name again... Marie Therese Francine Doubois?" Barclay Pierre-Dupont wouldn't look out of place on that list.
Having watched the excellent 90-minute update of 'The Sea Devils' first, this sadly only underscored the shortcomings. This is, unfortunately, just not very good.
Disappointing.
4/10.
