The Guvnors

Guvnors is a predictable "what is violence?", "when do men grow up?" type movie.

There is no match day aggro, any of that is just shown in brief flashbacks, so you'll be disappointed if you were looking for another The Firm or Football Factory. While we're on the subject, the violence acted out is good, well choreographed and mostly believable.

No, this is a tale of an old nutcase in retirement who comes up against a rising young nutcase, so far so clichéd. We're expected to believe that one guy (played by one of Rizzle Kicks lol) who inexplicably sniffs a lot and his multiracial cartoon character pyschos can become feudal lords of a half deserted London estate. The son of our antihero is threatened by a clichéd giggling blond loony, all weird head tilting and playing with knives, so the retired Guvnors firm are rounded up and pressed into action.

Are they saving their community? Participating in primal scream therapy? Mid life crisis? It's never clear, but the main catalyst is 70s songster David Essex, incredulously, flooring the sniffing gang leader in Britain's darkest pub then his later fate at the hands of our young Scarface.

I cannot buy the gang, it's leader, what they actually do (who buys their drugs, nobody lives there?), the sketchy flashbacks to "something" happening in the past...but to be fair Doug Allen does a fair job portraying the bored, uptight Guvnors top boy and we also bizarrely, considering this is London, get real life old Zulus top boy Barrington Patterson in his first geezer movie appearance.

Summing up - OK for a hungover morning or a sick day off work, but don't expect The Firm.

Predictable. Contrived. Far-fetched. Ridiculous. Nonsense. And about as detailed and dramatic as this review. It gets a 5 from me though, but only because I've seen worse.

One of the movie sub-genres I enjoy is British underworld / British Football Hooliganism. It is a nice change of pace from American mob movies, yet still includes the violence and action I enjoy. I go into these movies acknowledging there probably will be an absence of award winning dialogue, emotional relationships and gripping plot. But I expect gritty violence and for the movie to bring realism to that type of criminal behavior. Some movies do end up having great acting and a nice plot twist and that can elevate the underworld movie to a classic, but the Guvnors is not one of those. The movie has its pros, but its cons ultimately would make this a pass for me.

The movie's plot revolves around a local hoodlum with an established gang. Not satisfied with earning an illegal income and terrorizing innocent members of the community, he also craves respect. Some community members mention the old gang that use to run the streets, and how that gang "ran things the right way". Some he sets off by causing mayhem and coercing the retired old timer to come and meet him for a showdown on the street. It is a little silly how some recent British crime movies draw on this premise – that old time gangsters were somehow more noble that current gangsters. I guess if you steal and rob by only being somewhat violent, you are considered more civilized that someone who uses more violent methods. But alas, that is the premise of this movie.

The somewhat irrational plot can be overlooked, because when we rent these movies we just want violence in a realistic atmosphere. And the fight scenes do deliver. There are typical slow motion fight scenes and drug den robberies. The hoodlum actors do a good job of making us believe we are witnessing how a drug dealer behaves. However, for some reason the screenwriter tried to involve way too many plot lines and twists. And this leads to scenes introducing characters for no reason, twists that begin to distract the viewer due to their implausibility and an ending that does not really make sense.

It is a little frustrating spending time watching a movie and then being rewarded with such a poor ending. I feel as though it is easy to deliver on a crime drama. Just give us a crime story with one twist and punctuate the movie with violence. And the viewer agrees to overlook a hackneyed plot and weak character motivations. But when the plot beings to get muddled and characters make choices that make no logical sense, it can be a problem. And when these problems are so severe that they actually being to distract the viewer and ruin the realism of the movie, that is a problem. I would suggest trying another movie in this genre. Ultimately, plot revelations that made no sense and a rather silly ending will leave you very unsatisfied.

It's not that great to start with but it looked like it had potential. The incessant sniffing by the main character adds to the annoying viewing. Made on the cheap and in places it shows.

This film has been written off by some lazy press reviewers as just another mockney fighting movie, probably due to its slightly unfortunate title and cover art.

The reality is that couldn't be further from the truth. Although I sat down expecting to watch some kind of sub-Nick Love fluff (which isn't setting the bar very high at all), this was a far better film than I had expected.

The cinematography, music, performances and pacing were all very good, and the story is far from the kind of nonsense you'd associate with most standard football hooligan-style movies. It has nuance, depth and some great twists. It's a proper film, basically, and not just a load of fighting. Though there's a fair amount of that too.

I don't normally write reviews but I felt compelled to defend this movie because on reading some reviews (after I'd seen the film) it seemed that a lot of people had got it completely wrong and probably prejudged it because from a glance at the box, you'd think it was a bit dim. But it isn't.

Good work all round.