Círculo de Fogo: A Revolta

Strangely enough, the quality of big blockbuster movies is reaching the point where they have the same level of quality as those of game cinematics. The acting part and the "story" are so forgettable that the CGI is all that remains. And the CGI is stupid. I mean, not bad, just completely dumb. I've seen this done real time in computer games. The creators of this movie bet big money on condescendingly telling their entire audience that they are cretins for watching and, of course, paying for this. The whole movie is stupid, not the CGI, the CGI is slightly more interesting.

And you might think that I am one of those haters, but I am not. I actually loved the actors and how they played. Imagine good actors, waiting and training their entire life to get into the big leagues, and when they get there they have to perform admirably... on a dumb script. I am not going through it, just consider this: the entire premise of the movie is that kaiju blood reacts violently with rare earth minerals. So all you need to do is shoot him with rare earth mineral bullets! It was that bad.

To say that this movie is wrong is to understate it. If I could begin with one positive thing to say about it - it's that the giant robot fights can give Transformers a run for their money. Alas, this is as far as it goes.

Pathetic Rim swipes old characters under the rug, adds the black stormtrooper.... excuse me, getting a deja vu here..., introduces the characters "way" out of proportion(on the Marvel\Transformer level of stupidity, despite this being a damn Del Toro franchise), and barely tries to stay coherent throughout the runtime.

Instead of trying to do what honest sequels "must" do - reconnect with the story and make the viewer feel like they are watching Part Two, Pathetic Rim throws a few expositions, introduces us to an irrelevant situation that has Last Knight written all over it, shows a few scenes that are supposed to be reminiscent of what we've seen in the original. Oh, and, of course, once you see characters randomly reciting the events of the previous movie... you know that the writer has the experience of a first-grader. Not once, not twice, multiple characters will blatantly try to make this movie look like a sequel by laying out that major events of the original.

What is the movie about? Well, let's see... Last time I checked, the Jaeger Program was scrapped. Frankly, for a good reason. And that's before the victory. A few years after - we see numerous Jaegers around the world. Why? As a deterrent? Or to use the resources to build toys instead of rebuilding the damages? Of course, in light of all the Jaegers, there "have" to be places with "decommissioned" Jaegers, just waiting for brave looters to dig in. That's not just Last Knight, this is A Force Awakens rip-off if I ever saw one. But why rip off trash?

Somewhere in that mess of the girl from Last Knight and the ridiculous situation of AFA, we get our black stormtrooper, who is apparently an "already" prodigal son of late Marshall Pentacost - adhering to the nature's call of his race. Seriously. Don't you dare get offended. I am not a director, who put a black protagonist in a position, where he enjoys gangster stuff, looting and thug life. Just pointing it out.

After the aforementioned irrelevant situation - the two protagonists find themselves among the "new generation". Somehow - the whole deal is overseen by China. I understand that they are powerful, but does Europe count for nothing in this world anymore? God forbid they mention Russia, obviously, but, besides the base being located in China, which I could understand, because it's a "Pan Pacific" Defense Force, we also meet a large... that's right... Chinese corporation. And that's not even Last Knight, that's Age of Extinction. I get it, Chinese silicon infrastructure is world-leading, and USA is trying to appeal to them... well, tried to, before Trump... but besides that - they aren't that far ahead. Not in military. Not in machinery. Not in science. Any kind of precision german engineering, at least some Tesla ripoff - fine. But another movie with a large Chinese company building drones? No, thanks.

For a little bit, we are supposed to believe that this corporation is bad, because this is how it goes. Until a rogue Jaeger shows up and tears Gypsy a new one. After that - it's only questions. What was in that Siberian base? Plan B? Why was there only one rogue Jaeger? Why did the antagonist have to be where the plot needed him to be? Why were the Jaegers made out of butter back on the base? Why is the girl suddenly drift-compatible? Why was there the female object for our two protagonists? Why was the head lady suddenly a pilot? And, of course, why was the movie resolved like a deadline? No, not even cliffhanger - deadline. A cliffhanger promises something, this isn't even a promise.

It's not a waste of time, however, it can play ball with Transformers just fine. But it's not Pacific Rim. Del Toro showed us what the genre could do. What Godzilla, Transformers and even others "should" do. In the original, we saw Gypsy Danger smack the kaiju with a freighter, a god damn freighter. That scene alone gave the movie an extra pair. What can Pathetic Rim show us? A plasma cannon that kind of crushes down one skyscapper after another on a kaiju. Even Man of Steel would cringe, and that's saying something.

A sequel to a movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters. What was expected? Bigger robots fighting bigger monsters. The same thing with little tweaks - as most sequels do. What we got?

A product. A film generated by an AI. I wasn't there, but I assume it went something like this. The first meeting of the creators of this movie follows.

Ok, Google, what do modern kids like?

1. Robots (Transformers) 2. Scary cool monsters 3. Robots fighting monsters 4. Robots fighting robots 5. Memes from 2009 (Trololo sing) really? + memes from 2017 (the salt). 6. Horribly executed kid rebel subplots (Divergent, The Maze Runner, The Hunger games whatever) 7. Action 8. Forced drama? 9. Bad jokes?

Ok, let's take The Independence Day Resurgence's basic plot and fail miserably at everything. Done.

In other words, there is nothing in this movie besides action scenes. The plot lives on its own, there are no characters, and even their substitutes are completely disconnected from the dead plot. Nothing they do matter, it just follows typical cliches until the end. It even gets confusing at some point, but then you see the light at the end of the tunnel. It rushes the ending knowing that by this point nobody cares.

All the dialogue is cringe-worthy. Most of the actors are just having fun knowing that there's no need to get invested into anything here. Sadly, Scott Eastwood's face is stuck in one emotion and is unable to display anything else.

CGI crews did a good job, I guess. Looks fine. There's even one creative action scene involving buildings. Other than that the action is generic, even IMAX can't make it feel better. Maybe it would've been more impressive but the overabundance of CGI city destruction in modern blockbusters seriously lowers the threshold for getting impressed by CGI.

I'd compare this to a long video game cut-scene, but modern games have more character development and creative visuals in their cut-scenes. For instance, pretty much all Blizzard cut-scenes are visual masterpieces.

Final verdict: not entertaining on the big screen and a total waste of time for home viewing.

Although I did enjoy this movie, and it was a joy to watch on the big screen, the overall tone, and mood are so different from the first. The difference between fight scenes at night vs broad daylight may not seem like a big deal, but for some reason it really stood out to me. It just feels like this one was more geared toward kids, and potentially selling action figures. I didn't hate it by any means, but it really lacked what made the first one so unique, and intriguing to me.

Of course, adults are incompetent at doing anything to save the world, so the tweens must do it alone. Heard this plot line before? A thousand times? Of course you have. It's not any better this time.

You're not missing anything of substance by skipping this one. Just stick to the original and stay happy.