12/12/12

"12/12/12" will lure you in with an appealing cover, but the contents within that cover is simply put - disappointing, boring and far from interesting.

The very moment you see The Asylum's logo on the screen you know it is going to be one of those movies. And as with the movies spewed out from The Asylum, the vast majority of them are ridiculously hilarious to watch because they take the term bad to a whole new level. And "12/12/12" is exactly that.

The story in this movie is about a couple having a baby born on the unique date that is 12/12/12, and apparently to have a baby on that date is a very bad thing. The baby is not well and soon people start dying around it of mysterious incidents and accidents. A dark and gloomy Satanic cult wants the baby as it is the bringer of the end of the world.

This movie borrows heavily from other movies that managed to pull it off in a much better manner and a much more believable way. The baby in "12/12/12" is so horrible fake that it is painful to watch. And there was one scene that was just downright tasteless - it includes the baby and the mommy, that is all I will say. You have to see it for yourself. That was just a tad too much in my opinion.

As for the acting in "12/12/12", well given the production value of the movie and the budget, don't expect any overly familiar faces or any outstanding performances here. It was uninspiring and lacked conviction most of the time.

The Asylum spews out a lot, and I do mean a lot, of questionable movies that are so bad that they actually start to have entertainment value because they are so horrible to look at. "12/12/12" is nothing special and oddly enough it doesn't even qualify in the latter bucket of The Asylum movies. And the movie also had a fair number of bad mistakes in it, but I will leave that up to you to try to spot them.

Hi Director!

Why did you even think you should make this funny movie? You can't make this movie and humiliate audience's mind and thinking.

Did you really think no one will ask these questions?

1. Why mom lies and still loves this baby after killing doctors..? 2. Why mom could have sex after 1 week or 2, when she should have bleeding at least for 6 weeks? 3. Where they give epidural shot like that? 4. why mom was in pain with that much epidural? 5. why mom could see c-section? 6. Why mom and dad were trying to not have c-section after all?

Just I do not want to waste more of my time to write more... but I can write 20 pages about the silly stuff in the movie.

Advice for producer: If you have money to spend on movies, think about the result. Give money to me and I make a movie which make you 10 times richer! but promise after you become richer do not make 10 of these silly movies... lol

There were quite a few strikes against this movie from the beginning. First, the acting is not very good over all. No one really stank but no one was very good either. It rather reminded me of the level of acting you see in a high school play. Secondly, the sound was a problem. There is not very much background music in the movie and many of the shots seem kind of flat sounding as if they were shot in a padded warehouse or something. Even the street scenes are oddly empty sound- wise. There is a lack of motor vehicle sounds, animal sounds, people sounds, even the wind is missing. Third, the baby/monster looked ridiculously unbelievable. It looked like a wooden or plastic dummy being jerked along on strings or in some cases just thrown at people. It's face never even moves. Fourth, the dead rats that are left everywhere are laughably fake looking. You can buy more realistic ones at Walmart near Halloween. Fourth, the plot was beyond predictable there was no mystery, no twist at all. It laid everything on the table from the first scene. I usually try to find some good in any movie I watch. Oddly enough, the only I can think of to say in a positive manner is that Sara Malukal Lane, the main character, has truly lovely breasts. I am a straight female with no interest in girls at all, but I could not help but notice how perfectly shaped and placed they are. Showing them a couple of times was probably the best decision the director made in this movie. Other than that, it is an utter waste of time.

While I was admittedly not expecting much from 12/12/12 the DVD cover was really advertising, so I thought to myself this could be a worthwhile watch overall. Unfortunately, 12/12/12 is anything but, only the fact that some of the actors are genuine eye-candy comes close to a saving grace and that is not enough to save a movie. The movie looks cheap, it is dully lit and choppily shot but it was the ugly and unfinished-looking special effects that really cheapened 12/12/12 from a visual front. Any attempts of atmosphere are hindered completely by bizarre sound effects and overbearing scoring. You are also laughing out loud at the utter stupidity of the dialogue, the lines themselves are horrendously bad and very awkwardly delivered. The story is the biggest failing, pedestrian, utterly predictable from each frame to the next, too many ridiculous and unbelievable moments to list and a complete lack of suspense are what basically sums up the story of 12/12/12. The characters are lifeless cardboard cut-outs that you learn nothing about, the baby especially is creepy and actually in an annoying way than to anything else. The direction is flat and amateurish, and the acting from all involved is so poor that it's beyond description. Overall, terrible on all levels. And I've learnt a valuable lesson, like not judging the quality of a movie by its trailer I've learned not to assume that a great DVD cover equals a good movie. It doesn't. 1/10(I am tempted to go lower if I was allowed, but as I'm feeling generous today I'll let it stay put for now) Bethany Cox

When baby Sebastian is born on 12/12/12 everyone around him starts to die. Soon, his mother realizes that her son is the spawn of Hell.

Please, keep the camera steady! Or at least level! If I am going to watch a bad movie (bad acting, bad effects, bad everything else) at least keep the camera in such a way that I can actually view it without getting seasick.

The only redeeming part of this film was the postal carrier who calls the demon baby a "half hemorrhoid, half herpe" and says he would "kick it down a trash chute" if it was his baby. Wow. Such harsh words for a child (not as bad for a demon, but he does not know the kid is evil)!