I Spit Chew on Your Grave

I Spit Chew on Your Grave! (2009)

BOMB (out of 4)

I know there are folks out there who this film was aimed at but I'm clearly not one of them. Apparently director Chrsit Seaver is making a name for himself by releasing these cheap horror films, which include titles like TERROR AT BLOOD FART LAKE, FILTHY MCNASTY and TEENAPE GOES TO CAMP. This film here, running just 58-minutes, tries to spoof the "revenge" films from the 1970s and as you can tell, the title is a rip at the 1978 cult classic I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE. Here, an obnoxious loser wins the lottery but he ends up getting raped by three big-breasted prostitutes on orders by their warlock pimp. Soon the guy is back with a vengeance and seeking revenge. That's pretty much it but I'll warn you now that this "exploitation" movie features no sex, no nudity, no blood and pretty much nothing at all. For the most part this film goes for comedy with the bad acting made even worse by the terrible screenplay and the really ugly look of the picture. Yes, I know this was meant to "look" like a grindhouse picture and we also get the "missing reel" gag but it's still not any good. I honestly can't remember a more painful 58-minutes of my life even though I wouldn't go as far as to call this the worst movie ever made because I'm sure many would argue that it's not really a movie. Again, I know this type of film has its fans but I'm clearly not one of them. Those renting this expecting some sort of exploitation film are going to be disappointed. Those expecting anything decent are more than likely going to be disappointed but that's the price who pay when you're a horror fan seeking out titles like this one.

"I Spit Chew on Your Grave" is a Comedy/Horror movie from 2008, directed by Chris Seaver, and serves as a parody of the 1978 cult film "I Spit on Your Grave". This one runs for 58 minutes. The production was done by Bosoms Till Tuesday, while the distribution was done by SRS Cinema.

Basic plot: Gash Nasties, a group of three bad prostitutes lead by the mythical prince Gareth, rape a random loser man named Leo DeChamp who recently had won a lottery. Soon, Leo vows for revenge over these bad girls.

This film is basically a bad B-movie, please don't expect good acting skills, explicit nudity and spectacular violence/gore. The film attempts to make fun of the notorious rape-and-revenge-movies of the 70s, like the controversial "I Spit on Your Grave" (Day of the Woman) from 1978, but I think this film has done it somehow. This is not a movie to take seriously; just read the title "I Spit Chew on Your Grave", and you'll probably assume what kind of movie you'll be expecting.

Being a poorly made movie, I simply found this film somewhat interesting as a horror/comedy, and just had to laugh in some scenes. I mean, how many times do you see a man vowing to take revenge on women on rape-and-revenge films generally? Pretty rare, this is actually the first time in my life I've seen this kind of film. Honestly. I'm not kidding here. So, if you want to see this film expecting a good exploitation film in the likes of "Run! Bitch Run!" and the 2010 remake of "I Spit on Your Grave", you gotta be disappointed. This film is made for a laugh anyway. In other words, I don't regret one second of having watched this funny little so-called "Grindhouse flick".

However, just to have it pointed out already, this film is not released in Norway.

My overall rating will therefore be around 6-7 out of 10 stars.

Some of the other not-released-in-Norway trash movies I've seen include: "Cheerleader Autopsy" (2003), "Feto Morto" (2003) and "They Don't Cut the Grass Anymore" (1985).

Yep. Here we go again. Since apparently dedicating his life to spoofing other peoples movies, it's only natural that Chris Seaver would finally get around to doing something like this. This being a sorta-spoof of I Spit On Your Grave, as well as other Exploitation revenge flicks from the 70's. But mainly just inept 70's B-cinema. And I gotta point out, it's about time. If you're already familiar with Seaver's super-cheesy, silly-as-all-hell, LBP flicks, then you'll most likely assume that you'll know what to expect, going into this. Don't be so sure.

Of course, there's still more than enough wacky voices, stupid hair, and inspired LBP-ness to go around, considering most of the 58 minutes consists of Leo DeChamp running his mouth. Played by the now legendary Josh Suire, Leo DeChamp (from Terror At Blood Fart Lake fame) has just won the lottery. Unfortunately for Leo, it'll be all down hill from here. A warlock pimp, or something similar, has just ordered his gang of vicious prostitutes to rape this random guy that they seemingly don't even know. That's right. Leo's gonna get it. And it ain't gonna be purdy. And if you're wondering about an actual story, or any other reasons to watch, that's pretty much it. Wackiness, silliness, pointlessness and rape!

Personally, I would have enjoyed this film a lot more if Seaver had got Suire to play Caspian instead of Leo. There's no telling how this thing would have played out.

Seaver & the gang refrained from putting their names (or the LBP name) on the credits. Considering that's the first time this has happened, is hilarious beyond words. I assume it was mostly a joke, in an attempt to spoof the old school stuff. Although, on the audio commentary, Seaver states that nobody was really comfortable with using their real names on something that makes light of rape.

I Spit Chew On Your Grave isn't exactly my favorite of the LBP epics, as it's way too short, it's clearly less thought-out than his "normal" stuff, and to be blunt, Leo DeChamp is annoying. But most of all, I Spit Chew On Your Grave should have been better, considering who directed it. However, this film was directed by Chris Seaver, who I consider to be the one micro-budgeted filmmaker that has defined the last decade, whether people know it yet, or not. To me, the Seavage is Ed Wood, John Waters and Lloyd Kaufman rolled into one. So, now that I've made my passion and loyalty for LBP perfectly clear, I should probably point out that there is absolutely no chance of me giving this film less than a 10/10. Which is a good indication that you may not want to take this review as seriously as you first intended. Unless you're a crazy person. In that case, LBP is for you, friend. If you're not all that keen on modern Z-grade spoofs of old school B-grade Exploitation, and if you firmly believe that there is no such thing as a rape-comedy, then there's most likely nothing I could say to convince you that I Spit Chew On Your Grave isn't as irritating as it sounds. In that case, sounds like someone's been wasting their time.

In the last month, there has been a tragic death in the B-movie universe. As of February, LBP is no more. Gone forever. Instead of going into exactly how big of a loss this is, I will simply bring to your attention, the light at the end of the tunnel...

In 2011, we should be seeing the emergence of unreleased LBP epics, such as the Mulva remake (which will be the last LBP), Geek War, Moist Fury, Filthy McNasty 4, among others. Ladies and gentlemen. It has also been made official. Troma has finally agreed to release the lost LBP epic, Teenape vs.The Monster Nazi Apocalypse. What took them so long is a mystery to me, but it is happening!! And most importantly, just because LBP is no more, doesn't mean the B-movie world is safe from Chris Seaver and his gang of misfits. In one form or another, LBP will live on. As long as Seavage is mentally-unstable, and as long he's got friends willing "do all that", Seaver will be rubbing normal people the wrong way for years to come. Not to mention, making us crazy people laugh. But what can I say? I just get it. 10/10