- Mr. Hubley: [meets the gang] Well, if it isn't Frank, Danny, Veronica and Slappy.
- Velma Dinkley: It isn't.
- Fred Jones: I don't know much about hypnosis, Shaggy, but I know one thing: it can not make you do things you couldn't do without it! All that stuff you did when you were brave, that was you! It's inside you, you just got to let it out!
- Fred Jones: [about Mr. Hubley being a suspect] What do you think, Velma?
- Velma Dinkley: [dreamily] I think Winsor's eyes are the colour of sea-foam by moonlight.
- Daphne Blake: Okay. Somebody's going to be zero help tonight.
- Fred Jones: Go easy on her, Daph. Haven't you ever had a crush on anyone?
- Daphne Blake: [annoyed] Me? No. Why would be you ask?
- [storms to the Mystery Machine]
- Fred Jones: Well, it's just I...
- Daphne Blake: [annoyed] Why is everyone walking so slow?
- Daphne Blake: This could be really bad for our investigation.
- Fred Jones: Or maybe it's our investigation that's bad for her relationship with Winsor.
- Daphne Blake: Unless it's a bad match. If they have a bad date, then maybe it's a bad idea to worry about how bad the investigation is going, or how bad we want to solve this mystery.
- Faith: [as Scooby and Shaggy frantically eat] Woah, guys, didn't you read the sign? Don't take more than you can eat.
- Shaggy Rogers: We read it. What's the problem?
- Faith: Well, you can't possibly eat all...
- [Scooby and Shaggy finish eating]
- Faith: never mind.
- Shaggy Rogers: Seconds, Scoob?
- Scooby-Doo: You bet.
- Faith: So do I file for bankruptcy now, or...?
- Doctor: [about Scooby] Is that a dog?
- Velma Dinkley: Broadly speaking, yes.
- Doctor: You can't have a dog in the ER!
- Daphne Blake: It's okay, he's a certified medical rescue dog.
- [shows card]
- Doctor: You just made this in Photoshop, didn't you?
- Daphne Blake: No!
- [points to Velma]
- Daphne Blake: She did.
- [last lines]
- [the Mystery, Inc. gang are in Mr. Hubley's lab as Shaggy is being hypnotized back to his old self]
- Mr. Hubley: No longer will you turn into a fearless hero. No, you will just be your usual self...
- [Mr. Hubley looks at his clipboard]
- Mr. Hubley: ...Shaggy Rogers. When I snap my fingers, you will awaken.
- [Shaggy awakens]
- Velma Dinkley, Fred Jones, Shaggy Rogers, Daphne Blake, Scooby-Doo: Zoinks! Did it, like, work?
- Mr. Hubley: Oh, my!
- [cut to the Mystery Inc gang in the Mustard Machine; Fred, Scooby and the girls are all dressed like Shaggy, even down to their hairstyles and hair color]
- Velma Dinkley, Fred Jones, Daphne Blake, Scooby-Doo: Like, Zoinks. I'm Shaggy.
- Daphne Blake: [to Scooby] But how can you be Shaggy if like I'm Shaggy?
- Scooby-Doo: Uh, I don't know. Like, I'm just Shaggy.
- Fred Jones: Ha! Zoinks; I don't think so!
- Velma Dinkley: But wait! Which one of us is like the real Shaggy?
- Shaggy Rogers: [to Velma] Like, I'm pretty sure it's you.
- [the gang continues debating over who the real Shaggy is as they drive off into night]
- Scooby-Doo: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!