A Lista de Clientes

Client List, The (2010)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Incredibly silly drama from Lifetime about a Texas mother of three (Jennifer Love Hewitt) who finds herself about to lose her house after she's laid off and her husband is injured on the job and can't find work. She goes to work in a massage parlor but soon learns that the best way to get tips is through prostitution. When it comes to any made-for-TV flick you just know there are going to be certain amounts of melodrama but this film here must think its viewers are some of the dumbest people in the world. There are so many problems with this film's screenplay but the final twenty-minutes are rather insulting. Again, some might say I'm a man and this movie wasn't meant for me but I honestly don't see who could watch this ending and feel good about anything they've seen. I'm not going to ruin anything but this film is so full of sugar that the entire thing seems like a bad school play without a single thing going for it. I think one of the biggest problems with Hewitt who just isn't believable in the role. Not only does her Texas accent go in and out throughout the film but there wasn't a single second where I believed she was a mother of three. She didn't look like someone from a small Texas town and the screenplay doesn't do her any favors by having her shout she's too pretty to be poor. With dialogue like that it's impossible to feel sorry for her or her situation and it doesn't get any better when the screenplay tries to make her out to be some sort of victim in a world of bad men. Hewitt does come off well in the more sexual side of the role but the drama falls flat on its face and really kills anything the film is going for. Cybill Shepherd plays her mother and pretty much just sits around throwing out bad one-liners. I'm not sure if it was because this was made for the Lifetime Network but it seems that even in the most dramatic moments there's enough time to throw out penis jokes. I'm really not sure what could have saved this movie but a little bit of honesty probably would have gone a long way. The husband's reaction, the poor ending and how they try to turn the event into some new sensation just never works and in the end there's really not much this film has going for it. I'm also not quite sure what the filmmakers were trying to say in the reasons the character did what she did as there are thousands of people in the same situations and they're not inviting in hundreds of men.

Hewitt's character Sam makes passing nods to her "Christian Beliefs" whilst justifying her behavior as the only think she can do to help her family. Apparently in today's America helping your family means buying them stuff. Sam's love for her children barely extends beyond buying stuff for them which is probably where America is going wrong in the first place. Hewitt's performance center's around her unusual skills at satisfying her clients which apparently is the only thing her client's wives want to know in a later scene. Her husbands behavior is just as bizarre when he discovers what it is his wife is actually doing at her "Day Job". When did men start crying instead of doing what is more natural? The characters around Sam are just not that believable and even less so when Sam's mother says "it is partly my fault". When did a mother ever say that? The final punishment for Sam;s behavior and her redemption are both as ridiculous as the almost Disneyesque "Only for Mature viewers" plot line. if this is the 80's someone should pinch me so I can wake up. This has to have been written by someone who does not have a sex life.

I went into this just looking to kill a couple of hours, but really it isn't bad for what it is. Yes, some of the Texas traits are stretched ("hotter than a fur coat in Marfa"), but not as much as most Texas movies and some of the people and scenery actually felt familiar. (I'm from Texas.)

I found the main character to be believable. She was not portrayed as a victim or as a demon, but as someone who made a bad decision in difficult times and then continued that bad decision due to her own flaws. Watching her when she feels guilt seems very real to me. Her mother was also a fully developed character and her friends and some of the other characters had some moving scenes. I thought it was well acted and well paced. Two of the last scenes were hard to believe and were quick reminders that this was a TV movie.

I'd definitely rate this movie as mediocre all around. I've seen stories like this all the time. So&So starts off doing something morally wrong for money to get out of debt or to buy something they desperately want, then by the time they're out of debt or have everything they wanted and are at a good stopping point, they're addicted to the money until the they hit a wall, like police arriving to arrest them. Stories like this are a dime a dozen, even Pepper Ann had a similar episode to this, involving using her friend as a slave to cut lawns for her, so she can use the money to buy roller-skates. I think even The Weekenders did an episode similar to this, involving selling cheaply made, yet over-priced slushys to people without a food serving license. It's a very old plot, whether this movie was based off a true story or not. As for the acting, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Cybil Shepard do their best, but the script is pretty bad. Also, this movie is TV-14 on Lifetime, so yeah, a lot of innuendo but nothing too bad.

Samantha Horton (Jennifer Love Hewitt) and Rex (Teddy Sears) are struggling facing foreclosure. Former beauty queen Samantha uses everything in her arsenal to keep afloat. Rex is a former star running back who can't even keep his construction job with his bum knee. Then she gets a job at a massage parlor in the next town, but she soon finds out that she could earn more if she does more.

It's a Lifetime movie of the week. It's not that I have any moral objection to the characters or the story. I just find it very boring. I guess some may find the subject matter titillating or controversial. It's not much of either. It just seems that the struggle for Samantha is mostly one of image. Maybe a short scene in the beginning showing the couple at the top of the world would be very helpful.