- Eleanor: My therapist, the beloved Dr. Gratch, says that hurt people hurt people, but I just don't think that applies to teenage girls. I think sometimes they're just evil.
- Gabbi: The horny theater kids. Last year, they tried to mount a mostly white production of Hamilton. Lin-Manuel Miranda sent a cease and desist.
- Drea: You're absolutely right. They deserve to go down for what they did to us, but we can't go after them ourselves. We should team up and do each other's revenge.
- Eleanor: Oh, you're serious. Absolutely not,
- Drea: Why?
- Eleanor: Because I'm not capable? I can't do revenge.
- Drea: I mean, is "do revenge" even correct grammar?
- Eleanor: Oh I'm sorry, Schoolhouse Rock. Are you dragging my sentence structure right now?
- [first lines]
- Drea: [narrating] In high school, they say the best measure of success is, like, the clique you run with, or the accolades you receive. But my metric is a little different. You wanna know how you can tell when you've really reached the top? When someone wants to destroy you.
- Max: Dre, I just want to say how sorry I am for what happened to you last year. And to anyone of you who watched, or shared that video, I sincerely hope you take the time to examine why you did that. So, Dre, it's in your honor that I'm founding a new club, the Cis Hetero Men Championing Female Identifying Students League. Now, it is time for all the men at Rosehill who want to do better. Be allies.
- Kid in hallway: He's banging a girl in every clique.
- Eleanor: [about Erica] She sucks. She's mean in a way I didn't know existed anymore. She's like a Bitchasaurus rex.
- Eleanor: [voice-over] Getting a girl's attention requires weeks, if not months of work. But according to Drea, getting a guy's attention requires you walking past them once looking vaguely slutty.
- Drea: You ready to be my woman on the inside?
- Eleanor: No. For sure no.
- Drea: Eleanor! It's gonna be fine. My entire life I've been a chameleon. Sometimes, you have to pretend to be someone else to get what you want.
- Eleanor: Do you ever worry that you're gonna lose yourself?
- Drea: Oh my God, don't be so dramatic! All I'm asking you to do is disassociate from your body and be someone you're not so these popular kids will invite you to be in their group.
- Eleanor: Are you in therapy?
- Drea: God, no. Why?
- Eleanor: Cool.
- Erica: You insufferable cunt, I know you did this. You fra- she framed me!
- Jessica: You framed her!
- Drea: Oh, sweetie. Are you listening to yourself right now? You think I framed you?
- Jessica: [crying] You framed her.
- Drea: [sighs] Babe... are you on drugs right now?
- Erica: I don't do COCAINE!
- Jessica: She doesn't even know what it looks like!
- Erica: I don't know what it LOOKS LIKE!
- Eleanor: Do you really think Carissa's, like, growing drugs? Because I want to get her, but I don't want to send her to jail.
- Drea: First of all, Carissa's rich white ass is never going to jail. Second of all, the headmaster would rather Rosehill burn to the ground than have a public drug scandal on her hands. She is truly that bitch.
- Eleanor: I want her to, like, hit me with her Tesla and then reverse back over me.
- Drea: I want her to stuff me like a taxidermy doll and then mount me on her wall like a prize.
- Eleanor: I want her to hide my body in the woods and start the search party trying to find me.
- Drea: Ooh, good one!