Um Jogo de Mestres

Hey people "Spoiler alert", this movie SUCKS big time. If I could give a film 0 stars believe me I would, I am so annoyed at wasting my time and money seeing this movie I've felt obliged to put pen to paper. This film blatantly copies all the standard Brit Gangster tropes that we've seen before in films such as "Layer cake", "Gangster No 1" etc. but does them all REALLY REALLY BADLY. The story revolves around the protagonists losing a consignment of cocaine belonging to the Russian mafia, Wow what an original concept! The acting is abysmal and wooden to say the least, the dialogue is of the "Not on my Manor you Muppet" quality. The "jokes" are completely unfunny (I cracked a smile maybe twice). The producers have obviously gotten Charles Dance in as a known "Star" thereby trying to give the movie some credibility, (I like Charles Dance, but be honest when was the last movie of any note you saw him in?) Well Charlie obviously had a big Gas/Electric/Tax bill to pay when this job came into his in-box and he looks decidedly uncomfortable and dyspeptic throughout and is obviously just going through the motions. The rest of the cast are actors that you've probably seen in "Eastenders" or "The Bill" or in some other awful Brit flick standing next to Danny Dyer, trying to look hard and act less wooden than him. I notice a previous reviewer comparing this to "The Long Good Friday", well watching St Georges Day seemed as though I'd sat through a very "Long Long Friday" but there the similarity ends. Do yourselves a favour, get a copy of the aforementioned and brilliant "Long Good Friday" with Bob Hoskins acting his socks off in his best ever role, and give this rubbish a miss. There are some good Brit Gangster movies out there.....This isn't one of them by a Long Long way.

It's a decent film I'd you like hooligans and Gangsters with a bit of patriotism thrown in then this is your kind of movie Cocaine sniffing hooligans and there sexy women

The acting ain't the best and the nightclub scene with was funny I've sceanr note atmosphere is an retirement home and London was like covid restrictions had happened already dead streets with the occasional police sirens....

St George's Day is directed by Frankie Harper, he also co-writes the screenplay with Urs Buehler and stars with Craig Fairbrass, Vincent Regan, Charles Dance, Dexter Fletcher, Nick Moran, Keeley Hazell, Jamie Foreman and Sean Pertwee. Music is by Tim Attack and cinematography is by Mike Southon.

Frankie Harper, one of the most liked and recognisable faces from the slew of British gangster and football hooligan films, turns his hand to try and make his own mark in what is becoming a bulging genre of Brit film. The kicker here is that he blends the two popular lad staples together by having a plot involving gangsters using a football rumble as cover for a robbery. In Berlin, Germany, no less and St George's Day as well! Cor blimey!

Plot is kind of incidental, which is just as well since it's not exactly a brains trust script. Film is filled out with the requisite amount of shouting, swearing, fighting, shooting, thieving, jingoism, sloganeering and lairy witticisms. Harper has surrounded himself with pals, clearly offering up reassuring presences to the budding director, while it's fun for fans of this splinter of Brit cinema to play spot the face. It's all very blokey and enjoyable enough for the undemanding, but the good idea on the page is not born out as the narrative often gasps for fresh air, the attempts at complexity ending up mundane.

The cinematography is a highlight, with the number of Euro locations used giving good visual tonics. Cast perform adequately as per the material, though Moran, Fletcher, Dance and Pertwee are under used and therefore wasted. There's enough in here to suggest Harper could offer something of value as a director, but maybe a little less crass for crass sake should be jettisoned in favour of some intelligence in the writing. Dexter Fletcher's debut outing as a director, Wild Bill, is a good marker, Frankie would do well to follow his mate's lead. 6/10

St. Georges Day is a debut effort written and directed by eloquent and softly spoken Shakespearean thespian Frank Harper, famous for his roles in The Football Factory and Lock. Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (Guy Ritchie, 2008), and let us not forget his scene stealing performance as the bank robber in Kevin and Perry Go Large (Ed Bye, 2000). I thoroughly enjoyed Dexter Fletcher's (who is, of course, briefly in this) directorial debut Wild Bill last year, so maybe this could be another enjoyable treat. He seems to have persuaded all his mates to be in it, the only ones missing are Danny Dyer and Tamer Hassan; maybe they were performing Hamlet at the Old Vic during filming? Well...

I will come back to term 'enjoyable' later if I may? First, a quick review:

It seems Frank Harper has certainly learnt a few things while starring in all these geezer films, in basically that he has cut and pasted all the clichéd plots from these and stuck them all together in what is an absolute narrative mess. This film received consistently horrific reviews, and I have to admit that they are all deserved. St. Georges Day is the most possibly generic and clichéd 'cockeney gangster' film you could imagine. Every cliché in terms of plot and characters is there to see in full clunky and embarrassing glory. I am not going to list them here, but anyone who watches this will be ticking them off in their head almost involuntarily. As for the dialogue, co-written by Frank himself, when there are lines such as "The Price is Right? This isn't the game show you c**t!" or "Two words: Angry Russians", it is basically Eastenders with swearing.

There is a also a very insular and quite racist approach to this film, such as the typical evil Russian gangsters and double crossing Dutch drug dealers. However, what becomes really embarrassing is Frank Harper's deluded sense of patriotism that comes out within the script, there are many occasions where he compares their drugs operation and how they are going to sort out the mess they created to strategies deployed by Churchill and the British armies in both of the world wars. This is both insulting and rather embarrassing to watch; as we have to remember that these men are criminals despite whatever 'moral code' they follow. There are many voice-over scenes, usually with Frank Harper looking pensive on some riverside where he tries to justify to us why he is essentially a criminal. He often mentions things like 'loyalty' and tells us that he never killed anyone that "didn't deserve it or would have done the same thing to him". No Frank, you are criminals, you are not the good guys. Even the police are portrayed as bad guys for simply doing their job; does Frank really think we are that stupid? Also, it is worth saying that Keeley Hazell stars in her debut film role and is shocking, though let us face it, she is not there for her acting is she? She also plays Mickey's girlfriend and there are many scenes where Frank Harper gets to kiss her. Hang on! Isn't Frank Harper writer, actor, director and producer? Indeed he is. Oh, Frank, you dirty old man! However, her character as 'Peckham Princess' (No, me neither) is beyond caricature, as with all the women here who are simply portrayed in a shamefully misogynistic way. However, this just adds to the list of generic narrow minded stereotyping like evil Russians, drugged up crazy Dutch people, angry Scottish people etc.

Now, I will return to the phrase 'enjoyable', and though I may well be contradicting what I have previously just said, but I must confess that I found St. Georges Day extremely enjoyable. This does come with a proviso though: If you take St. Georges Day with a pinch of salt, and when you see a cast list like that (maybe with the exception of Charles Dance – maybe a marketing ploy?) how on earth can you take this film seriously? I went into this film expecting ridiculous nonsense and was not disappointed; I must confess that it frequently made me laugh. It is obvious that Frank Harper thinks he is making the Citizen Kane of British gangster films. St. Georges Day takes itself so ridiculously seriously; this almost makes it even funnier to watch. You never laugh with it, but frequently at it and because of this I will confess that I actually really enjoyed it, though certainly not for any of the reasons dear old (now officially an auteur) Frank Harper would want.

In summary: Predictable, clichéd, crap. This is the definitive British gangster film in that every cliché and caricature is there to see, all put together by the chunkiest script imaginable. However, this may well be (unintentionally) one of the funniest British films of recent years.

This movie came out of nowhere and completely blew me away. It's gritty and raw, but it's also got so much heart. It pulls you in from the start and keeps you hooked until the very end. The characters feel like people you can relate to, and their struggles hit hard.

The action is intense, but the story is what really stands out. You actually care about what's happening, and that makes every scene hit harder. It's not polished or fancy, but that's part of what makes it so good. Even the slower moments work because they make you more invested. If you're looking for something with action, emotion, and real stakes, this is it.