Shelter in Place

I watched this about a week before it came out. Been sitting here waiting to give this movie one star, which was only available to do so today, as it was the official release date.

This movie is bad. And I mean really bad. So bad it hurts because you realize you could have been doing anything better than wasting your time watching it. If you spent money on this movie, then great job getting clowned, because at least I didn't give them a single penny. You on the other hand have to live with the fact that you wasted actual money on it! Haha! Scream into that pillow for me later tonight when you try to sleep.

There was some great build up in this movie, and then the ending just sort of happens. Why is it happening? Oh, you're going to love the non-excuse they give, which amounts to the degenerate "Somehow Palpatine has returned" line from the recent Star wars dumpster fire.

Look, in short, because I don't want to spoil it and have my review hidden, this movie is not a movie. It's just something that people happened to film over the course of a week or whatever, and then somehow managed to actually string it all together. The scenes make no sense together. There is not real plot because the way it was filmed was nothing more than random scenes that could narrowly be spliced together to form a modicum of coherency.

Do not waste your time, and do your duty and give this movie the 1 star it deserves. I imagine the creators are going to see this, and I just wanted to say directly to them, "This is a cry for help; you lack serious skill and talent. I would say you should probably just get used to the idea of working at McDonalds, but I would be concerned if I saw you making my food."

I watched the first 27 minutes waiting for something interesting to happen. Then I gave up and went back to watching '80s horror movies. Horror film makers in the current age need to remember to grab the audience's attention fairly quickly. Gimme something interesting within the first 15 minutes or it's time to move on to something else.

Finally seeing reviews of a film where 100% of the first 15 reviews are fake (aka first-timers/friends of the film). It was watchable, but very boring almost all the way through. No sensible ending or backstory just makes you feel like a potato for watching it.

To be fair, the acting is ok and the sound effects and general spooky atmosphere work quite well in addition to it fitting in with the current pandemic but that is all that fills this cinematic sandwich.

The idea is there but there is no core to it; it is just a pity it is so slow and nothing much happens until the final denouement so it could all have been condensed into a short twilight zone episode instead of drawn out into a movie and the end, well it says it all as though they ran out of cash. The credits and titles look like they were produced on a ZX Spectrum which from the beginning did not bode well either!

Its not great but its not that bad - A 4 means slightly less than average.

I was lured into watching the 2021 horror movie "Shelter in Place" given the movie's cover/poster and the fact that it was a new horror movie that I hadn't already seen.

Now, I can't claim that the movie's synopsis did much to sway me, and with it being yet another movie taking place amidst a global pandemic, I must admit that my interest in the movie sort of waned a bit. But on the odd chance that writers and directors Chris Beyrooty and Connor Martin might actually dish out something worthwhile here with "Shelter in Place", I sat down to watch it.

And I managed to endure 63 minutes of pure boredom, and then I just tossed the towel in the ring, giving up on the movie out of sheer boredom and tedious watching. Wow, this movie was slow paced and it was not even the slightest bit scary. Well, unless you consider a movie with just essentially five people on the cast list as being scary, then by all means...

Now, I am sure that the actors and actresses on the cast list, all five of them were doing good jobs, but they virtually had nothing to work with in terms of an interesting storyline, well-detailed characters or riveting dialogue. So they were just fighting an already lost uphill battle.

No, "Shelter in Place" was a swing and a miss, and it completely fell short of providing me with any worthwhile entertainment, so this is not a movie that I would recommend you rush out to get your hands on.

My rating of "Shelter in Place" lands on a generous two out of ten stars. Sadly, then the movies cover/poster was actually the best part about the entire ordeal.