Mystery Team (2009)

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Mystery Team

Jason: She's really something, it's just... I'm no good with girls.
Frank: Oh, you're whipped!
[imitates whipping]
Jim: [interrupting] Frank! Sometimes I wish you didn't beat that cancer. I really do.

Jordy: When I was fifteen years old, when I got this job, I said to myself, "I am going to work here until the day that I kill myself."

Kelly: [holding the ring] Where did you find this?
Jason: It's a... long story.
Charlie: No it's not. A stripper peed it into a toilet.

Jamie: There's something fishy going on down at the sardine factory! I think it's fish!

Duncan: Looks like we've got a long night of cocaine ahead of us.

Jason: We are mature and legitimate detectives.
Kelly: What the hell is that smell?
Duncan: I drank dog urine.

Jason: Ah, cinnamon sticks!
Charlie: Ah, Chinese checkers!
Duncan: Fuck! Yeah, that's right. I've been saying "fuck". Going in the backyard and trying it out.

Duncan: Sorry I'm late, everybody. My science teacher says my thesis needs to prove something... but I think listing all the dinosaurs proves there was a lot of dinosaurs.

Duncan: Our most consistent customer has Alzheimer's!
Jason: Mrs. Kimmel does not have Alzheimer's!
Duncan: She bakes fifty pies a day for her dead husband. Most of the pies are filled with soap.

Duncan: We're keeping evidence from the police, okay? We could go to jail! You know what happens in jail? No T.V.!

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