BloodRayne 3: O Terceiro Reich

Uwe Boll strikes again. "The Third Reich" is the third film in the "Bloodrayne" franchise set this time in Europe during WW2. What drew me in wasn't that I was a fan of the films or even Boll, but the concept of a war torn backdrop with Nazis tackling the supernatural in the shape of a vampire. Even with a bad reputation, these premises I would gladly take the risk. However "The Third Reich" was a risk not worth taking. In 1943 Europe, during WW2 Rayne and a group of resistance fighters take on Nazi commandant Ekart Brand turned day-walker, who plan to grant Hitler immortality. While I was mildly amused by first two films, this entry was utterly dull with a constantly stilted, if rambling script with too little action to compensate it. Boy did Clint Howard's German scientist have plenty to say, very laborious too. For most part it's talky and with such a daft and lazy script (these characters sure do like to use phrases and sayings), best little was said, but Boll thought otherwise. It just meanders from one shot to another. Natassia Malthe returns as Rayne, rather sexed-up (just look at her outfit) oozing with confidence and angst, but a little more whinny than I remembered. Again her dialogues were often cringe-like, but when it came to the action choreography, her sword skills do deliver on the mobility and carnage. Although the gun combats, felt sluggish in its staginess. Also she does get her gear off, where Boll throws in random lesbian eroticism. Michael Pare monstrously hams it up as the German commandant who's turned by Rayne. Interesting concept, which can't hide the fact it's on the cheap and downright junky. Gotta love Rayne's nightmare sequence involving Hitler.

"F**king Nazis."

Going into this movie I had only seen the first Bloodrayne movie which I didn't mind because there was so much action. Bloodrayne: The Third Reich is once again about action, but sadly the action scenes are way to short and there is just not enough in them. There was actually one action scene that came out of no where and the time could have been used better. The acting was sub par with some laugh out loud moments because of both the script and the acting, especially the last line in the movie. I like how the movie didn't go overboard with gore like the first movie.

The movie without the credits runs 1hr 12min director's cut, which shows how the movie could have been made a lot better if someone put more time into the script. I wouldn't recommend this movie because it just doesn't pack a punch. The script does have humor that isn't witty, but you still get a laugh because it is so random. If you want something to waste your time with then go ahead and rent it, but just don't buy it.

Nag nag nag, that is what is happening when Uwe Boll is making a new movie. It is a must to break down flicks made by Uwe Boll but not for this reviewer. I don't like all his flicks but if it does deliver something then you must admit that too and just don't walk with the crowd to say, I hate it.

Bloodrayne 3 as we can state it is indeed a downfall towards the 'names' of the actors. Face it, part one had Kristanna Loken (Terminator 3) and Ben Kingsley (Ghandi)in the leading role. In fact, storywise it doesn't follow the line it had in part 1, it's more a flick on his own.

It was filmed back to back with Blubberella, that film really was a turkey but Bloodrayne 3 was rather okay. Were it leaves for example the script of the original one is that here we do have e lot of nudity even on the part of Rayne, this time played by Natassia Malthe as seen in Bloodrayne 2 and Lake Placid. She did well and by saying that I mean, the acting was okay but don't think to see an Oscar performance. Some shots that you will see are exactly copied in Blubberella like for example the scene at the whore house were Rayne takes a guy by his balls while he's messing up a whore.

The idea of taking the story to the Nazis makes it a bit cheesy for some but what if I say, Dead Snow, there we had zombie Nazis too but it worked due the gore added to the scenes. And that's maybe what Bloodrayne 3 lacks, the amount of blood. Oh yes, it do flows but it is always in the same way, slashing off-camera and you see blood sputtering before the camera. Just one gory shot was added, one soldier intestines are cut out, maybe the scene with the vampire on the table being cut open by the doctor is worth mentioning.

I was also surprised by the nudity added in this flick, a lot of titties are shown even those of Rayne and a small lesbian love scene was added too. I enjoyed it and the flick was over just before you know it clocking in at 75 minutes. Bloodrayne won't be Underworld, but that's a fact of money. Some CGI was added and didn't bother me at all. Simple story and one maybe to watch with your boozer friends.

Gore 2/5 Nudity 2/5 Effects 2/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5

That very thought was going through my head when I rented this cinematic excrement. Nazis are my favourite bad guys and this seemed like a promising take on a good formula. In short, the story was vapid and the acting was awful. They threw in some sex to titillate, but all it did was make me angry. The mad doctor is over the top yet not in a good way and he was stupid to boot. The lead Nazi was an acceptable villain, but only because his acting was not painful and he was a Nazi. The heroine seemed rather one dimensional and devoid of life (which I think was the "actress'" fault rather than the writers' or even intentional). The heroine, by the way, never actually wears those painted on "pants". Ever. Sorry. This movie is neither bad enough to be good nor is it passable as late night brain dead viewing. I should have known to save my $1.02 when I saw the cover. What can I say: I have a weakness for dead Nazis and shapely hips.

How bad? Bad enough that FF was not fast enough. A waste of time even at that speed. Usual right off the bat indicators of cheap. No subtitles; audio levels all over the place; camera angles that made no sense; a script that had lines limited to 7 words so that the editors could edit the next monologue due to a lack of memory capacity in people paid to perform (I've seen dogs in animal movies handle their scripts with more skill); same people reading lines as if they were reading directly off of a script page.

Uniquely bad to this movie was gunfire that sounded like cheap firecrackers; actors falling just like children keel over with tongues hanging out when they pretend to be shot or jump in the air sideways from an explosion even though it's a block away and even though their clothing or paper on the ground next to them were not affected. The worst martial arts style movements ever seen in a movie consisting of 15 minutes of rehearsal practice on spinning and yelling like a tennis player with each spin.

The only part of the movie that seemed natural were the 30 second historical short films of WWII Germany.