Why Didn't Anybody Tell Me It Would Become This Bad in Afghanistan

Originally posted on letterboxd on October 6th, 2023

i first discovered the existence of this film by looking at a wikipedia list of films that were recorded entirely with a phone, i saw this mentioned on there and i was really intrigued mostly because of its title and the very few screenshots that i saw online

the graininess of all the footage reminded me of something that you'd see on liveleak, and it really just... captivated me because of how.. eerie it feels?? There is little to no music in this film, mostly just ambience and chatter from people on the street. The only times music plays is one scene where the camera is recording some construction workers, after which it cuts to a shot of a dilapidated house.... this time, in good camera quality! I assume its a flashback of the protag's experience in afghanistan, as those traumatizing memories are still clear in his head.

Near the end of the film, he drives around and records some really serene experiences, rainy skies, fish at an aquarium, treetops, and candles flickering on his desk. Those scenes really contrast the intense vibes of the film, but then it cuts to the ending which was really ominous and just... raw yk?? I dont know how much i can describe it without having to put a spoiler tag on this review but like. Yea. By the way the plot synopsis described on vimeo is just. Really funny:

[...]"But so much for the story. What you will actually see is something very different, as you're inside the head (or rather the phone) of a man whose mind is fractured from his experiences in war.

Will he be able to conclude his tragic mission? Will it set his mind at ease? And does this film connect in any way with this synopsis?"

this is only the end part of it, the synopsis itself was quite long and detailed and then it immediately suggests that it might not be at all truthful... fitting since you really are just watching normal daily life events from the eyes of a traumatized war veteran.

The battleground of Afghanistan haunts the experimental Dutch film "Why Didn't Anybody Tell Me It Would Become This Bad in Afghanistan." Director Cyrus Frisch's first-person narrative - if it can be called that - was shot almost entirely on a cell phone, and the result is something between an impressionist rendering of Amsterdam and a Hans Hoffmann canvas in motion. More than anything else, this 70-minute document of a day in the life of a Dutch veteran of the Afghanistan war reveals a state of mind terrorism has introduced to the West: the fragmented image, the trembling camera-phone, the vague sense of menace are all part of it. Mr. Frisch's unconventional cinema may not be for everyone, but this is that rare film in which Afghanistan really gets under your skin. Review by Darrell Hartman, writer/filmproducer

The film has the title of being one of the first fictional features to be shot in an mobile camera, when they don't were that increasingly good definition quality of nowadays, and just that fact made this film a exceptional art work to be watched. The pos traumatic theme, of a war veteran, is way well figured. But what amazes me, not only as a mobile cinema fan, but as a CINEMA fan, is how the blurry images from a old smartphone created such an atmosphere and aesthetic. Watching the film is a exercise to escape the obvious way of watching a film. I hope more people get access to this film. Mr. Frisch had a really good idea with a mobile camera in hands.

Why didn't anybody tell me it would become this bad in Afghanistan- 2007, Directed by Cyrus Frisch

Shot entirely on his cell phone, Dutch film maker Cyrus Frisch presents a series of shots jumbled into the first full length feature film, shot on a cell phone camera, to premiere at a major film festival. The films only character is apparently a veteran of the war in Afghanistan who has returned to his tiny Rotterdam apartment. His balcony serves as his lone link to the outside world. He attempts to film his neighborhood and the tense cityscape below. Frisch briefly turns his eye towards the unemployed immigrant teenagers whose day and night loitering is mixed in with with starkly violent clashes with police.

Unfortunately all potentially potent footage is bogged down in pixilated obscurity. Frisch abandons the explosive early shots and instead moves into a random collage, as our protagonist looks down at his boots and completes various mundane chores. He walks up a hillside to meet an unknown man, travels by plane to an unknown destination staring out the window the whole time. Next we are treated to extra long face shots soaking up far too much grainy camera time. The worst of it comes in a painfully long sequence (4 minutes), where our hero (I'm not kidding here) takes out the garbage.

Instead of tackling the tense cultural divide between native Dutch and Middle Eastern immigrants, Frisch instead tries to craft his film into an abstraction, yet he is consistently hemmed in by the limitations of his own technology. His feature is caught between a documentary and an avant-garde film although it has the short-comings of both. Too many shots are uninteresting to start, but even those that could have been explosive are just too grainy to stomach. At best "Why didn't somebody tell me....." will secure it's position as a well intentioned novelty.

Paulie the Hat