Bad Biology

Bad Biology is a weird one. The story itself is okay. It's perverse, imaginative and just plain screwy. But when put on film, it's a unfunny, kinda boring flick that felt like it tried too hard. There are some ideas that would be better to be put on paper format, and some on celluloid. Bad Biology would have been a great novella, but a 90 minute flick with bad unlikeable characters, mediocre writing with jokes that fall flat every which way, and ridiculous but still unfunny situations, the story all but fails. There's a lot of nudity, that's the plus side.

The story is supposed to be a "God Awful Love Story", but it's anything but. It's basically just two freaks who end up meeting one another, and there is zero love anywhere. Just that dumb chick speaking to the camera on how she's special, which I guess, is supposed to make us think she deserves love. The dude barely pays attention to her. I know it's supposed to be an awful love story, but there's zero love in it. It's a god awful sex story, that's for sure.

I had high hopes for Hennenlotter's latest because it did sound pretty good. If the movie had any chance of succeeding it would have been in the comedy department. A recent flick that's slightly horror/comedy like this that did a much better job was Teeth. Instead of revolving around the two freaks, they should have focused more on the freak babies. Eh, whatever. Besides the plethora of nudity it was also fun seeing Rude Jude from Jenny Jones.

I'm not familiar Frank Henenlotter's work. I haven't seen any other of his movies. I watched this one because of the positive comments I found on IMDb. But believe me - watching this movie is complete waste of time. The plot is terrible, the acting is terrible (especially by Charlee Danielson), the special effects are (guess what?) terrible, and the music is simply annoying. The music seems to be made on a cheap keyboard by a person that doesn't know how to make music. It could be a great movie, because the idea for it is good, but there are too many things in it that make it not worth watching. This movie is utterly bad and I don't understand why some people should find it so great.

In the late 80s, cult horror auteur Frank Henenlotter got a bad case of sequelitis, churning out two follow-ups to his low-budget masterpiece of splatter Basket Case in quick succession. Then he virtually disappeared.

Now, after a sixteen year hiatus from movie directing, he's finally back with something original—and my god, do I mean original!! Opening with the amazing line 'I was born with seven clits', the latest offering from Henenlotter is completely insane from the word go—a fabulously fun and filthy farrago of sordid sex, crazy violence and insatiable, self-conscious genitalia that is without a doubt the director's sleaziest effort so far.

Charlee Danielson plays Jennifer, the owner of the aforementioned multi-buttoned beaver, whose bizarre biology causes her to feed on orgasms and give birth to partially-formed mutant babies just two hours after sex. Understandably a little unbalanced, Jennifer has developed an uncontrollable rage that sometimes results in the death of her sexual partners. What she really needs is someone equipped to fully satisfy her urges... someone like Batz (Anthony Sneed) whose penis has grown to massive proportions after being repeatedly injected with a cocktail of drugs (many of which were designed for use on farm animals!).

Obviously, with a demented plot like that, Bad Biology is aimed at those discerning movie lovers who enjoy their entertainment 'out-there', and they will definitely not be disappointed: Henenlotter's bonkers script sees Jennifer enthusiastically work her way through several lovers, leave her screaming new born babies abandoned in the trash, and bash in one poor guy's head with a bedside lamp, pausing occasionally to apologise for her behaviour. Meanwhile, Batz wrestles with his prehensile member, tries to score obscure drugs from a local dealer, straps himself into a massive piston-driven sex toy for some fun, and causes a hooker to go into a never-ending spasm of pleasure. Eventually, his member detaches itself to go in search of action on its own, before locating Jennifer and allowing her to experience a state of rapture.

Given the bizarre nature of his films, Henenlotter has always had to fund his own work, and unfortunately, this time around, the lack of cash is obvious, with the film having a nasty, cheap look to it (despite reportedly being shot on 35mm film), and a cast who could do with a few more acting lessons. Other than that, however, the film is just too weird not to love: Gabe Bartalos, the man who made Henenlotter's lovable creatures Belial and Aylmer, is once again responsible for some rather shonky creations, including Jennifer's mutant snatch and Batz's thrashing schlong, but somehow the naffness of the effects only makes them more endearing (hell, I've almost forgiven the man for directing Skinned Deep); there's wall-to-wall nudity from a bevy of fit women (including a photo-shoot featuring topless models wearing vagina masks); and the film ends with the birth of a walking penis baby!! Now don't tell me that hasn't piqued your interest...

You know, I'm still trying to think of how to review this movie. It's disgusting as hell, and also about as sleazy as you can get, but that's exactly what Frank Henenlotter was shooting for, and he exceeds as always. We start with the story of a woman that has seven clits, and is constantly getting off, or looking to get off. And not only that, but after each time she gets it on with a guy, she has a mutant baby within two hours, which she just flat out discards. Now that should be enough, but nope, there is also a dude that has a huge penis that pretty much thinks for itself, and requires constant stimulation to keep the dude from going insane. So he has this jerking off machine which is a hoot, and also plenty of drugs from his fixer to keep him totally screwed up, which helps in handling his huge, and I mean HUGE monster penis. So here we have, a woman with a 24 hour a day sex drive, and a man with the male equivalent. Perfect match so you say?? Not so fast.... By the time they meet, the monster prick has taken off on its own, leaving the poor dude behind. Yep, a monster prick that goes around searching for women, and having not much of a problem finding them. So how does this all end? Well, that's why you watch the movie. Frank Henenlotter is definitely a unique filmmaker, with a few of the most amazing gore films ever made, and I love his work. This movie is a little different, because it was basically written by a rap artist, who is also the producer. The commentary explains all of that, because it's him and Frank doing the talking, and they seem to be having fun. Many of the roles in the film are also rap artists, and the music is pretty much all rap or close to it. It doesn't make much difference, because there are so many naked gorgeous women mostly with large breasts in this movie, that I didn't pay a lot of attention to the music. Some people might almost call this movie soft porn, and I doubt the filmmakers would disagree, but it does have a big Frank Henenlotter blood and gore element to it, and also all that strangeness we find in only his movies. For me, I like it, it's certainly a lot better than "Black Devil Doll", which I have still not reviewed. Those two movies are really not that similar, but they do both feature a lot of naked women with large breasts. Soooo, yes, you definitely need to have this one in your collection, if for no other reason, than it's a Frank Henenlotter film, and those are far and few between, which is sad to me, because it is definitely a one of a kind.

"Bad Biology" wasn't as interesting as I would have hoped. Henenlotter makes one-of-a-kind movies, some of which are certified cult classics, like "Basket Case" and "Brain Damage". You know you're going to see something different when you watch one of his movies.

"Bad Biology" does have an interesting concept. We have a young woman with a strangely overdeveloped reproductive system: she has at least seven clitorises, can orgasm just by crossing her legs, and is a nymphomaniac who gives birth within hours after having sex, and simply leaves her "freak babies" to die in trash cans.

She meets a young man whom she believes might finally be able to satisfy her: he has an enormous, insatiable penis he talks to, and is addicted to drugs he uses to keep it subdued.

The stage is set for what could have been a very interesting kind of love story between two "freaks". Instead, it takes too long for the characters to meet, and they never really have a relationship. The whole movie feels pedestrian; lazily shot and put together, the line readings mostly unnatural and the dialogue scenes poorly edited.

For some reason there area few refugees from the underground hip-hop scene involved in front and behind the camera: Vinnie Paz from Jedi Mind Tricks, Remedy from the Wu-Tang Clan, and R.A. the Rugged Man.