The Screening

This is the closest to an on-screen abortion that I've ever seen. Cameron Romero has apparently inherited his father's recent decline, without the ascent to give him a reputation.

The characters are all forgettable, the plot is simplistic and has been done better many times before (for example, in Cigarette Burns, part of Showtime's Masters of Horror). Basically, the films of a man named Borgia have been shown to cause riots, and an old copy has finally been found to screen. As it begins to show to a packed theater, madness and murder ensue.

I saw the film awhile ago, but just decided to post about it now, so I can't quite recall the characters - mostly because they are trite and forgettable - and I'm also a horror aficionado, and this wasn't even a blip on the radar. Even bad horror movies have some redeeming qualities, but this was just unbelievably awful in every respect. Troll 2 was a "good" bad movie, while this was just a BAD bad movie.

The deaths - arguably what you would be paying to see - are miserable and lackluster. The only one with the slightest bit of innovation occurs in a bathroom, and even then it borrows from other, better films.

More important than the deaths is that you don't care if anyone dies. They are all expendable, and not even in a fun teenage-slasher way, but in a boring kind of way.

Finally, Romero's direction is lackluster at the best of times. The way the camera swings around and bobs and weaves nearly gave me a stroke, not to mention the awful color filters he uses throughout, making it appear like we're viewing the film through a rotating child's lamp.

Wonder why this thing has been around since 2006, but no one has picked it up for distribution? Because it is so blisteringly bland, so maddeningly vapid, and so unbelievably stupid that even the marketing behind the name "Romero" could not sell this piece of trash to anyone.

Avoid at all costs.