Quarto Seis

Well, somehow this movie didn't convince me. Poor direction, predictable story and the actors didn't perform as great as they could. It's about a woman who has delusions and hallucinations throughout the whole movie. She and her boyfriend have a car crash and then her boyfriend is taken to a hospital. But which one? The doctors didn't say anything. She calls all hospitals in the area but all of them claim that her boyfriend isn't there. Is he maybe in some hospital that does not exist anymore?

Anyways, you won't miss a thing if you decide not to watch this movie. The title "Room 6" has nothing to do with the story. So don't let it deceive you. It sure deceived me.

A woman and her boyfriend get into a car accident. After the man is taken by ambulance to an unknown location, the woman (Christine Taylor) goes on a hunt to find him along with her new friend (Jerry O'Connell) -- along the way encountering demons for some reason.

I am sad to report that Christine Taylor makes for a very weak leading lady. I loved her in "Dodgeball" and "My Name is Earl", but for some reason she comes across as very flighty here (more in the first half than in the second). Is she not capable of drama? Is acting scared just not something she can do? I don't know, but I was let down. (I'm still jealous of Ben Stiller for having such a hot wife, though.) The early parts of the film are very tedious. There is lots of empty, repetitive dialogue (both in the opening hospital scene, and shortly after when Amy is getting picked up from school). The less each person says, the better the scenes are in this movie. Unfortunately, in the first ten minutes no one will shut up long enough to let the movie have a solid start. (The phrase "I'm awake" probably is said no less than twenty-five times in the first five minutes.) What I found also odd was that although the makeup was decent (the demons looked like demons), the special effects were not very impressive. Rather than use a trick syringe for an injection, for example, they slid the syringe under the sleeve of a patient. Maybe I'm picky and the average viewer wouldn't notice, but I felt cheated.

Now, the scenery was nice. The abandoned hospital, the ambulances, the demons. There is a scene with vampire lesbians (or something like that) which I thought was quite alright, although it was more of a tease than anything.

Somebody decided to cast Jerry O'Connell, and I'd like to know whom that was. In all fairness, Jerry was a better actor in this film than Christine Taylor. But he just calls to mind crappy films like "Tom Cats" and the show "Sliders". I like Sliders, but this guy is a cheesy actor. He's right up there with Brendan Fraser. His very presence makes a movie's suck factor increase. This one was no exception.

Horror icon Kane Hodder (better known as Jason Voorhees) shows up to be a demon bum. I enjoyed seeing Kane Hodder, but the part was not important and could have been played by pretty much anyone. (And really, if you're casting for a bum, get someone who's bum-looking, not a weightlifter.) I will give the Best Actress award in this film to the little girl named Melissa (played by Chloe Moretz). She actually had my full attention when she was on the screen, like everything she said or did was crucial. Excellent. Moretz is becoming what I would call "the Dakota Fanning of horror", because she seems to be the person you call when you need a little girl. (Moretz has so far also appeared in "Wicked Little Things" and "Amityville Horror".) My biggest problem with this movie, besides the poor acting and weak production value, was I was constantly asking myself: did any of this add up? Demons, lesbian vampires, a hospital that doesn't exist, ambulances that steal loved ones. The film makes some attempt to explain this, but that attempt is incredibly weak and I was left trying to piece things together. But I felt like I opened a 500-piece puzzle and 700 pieces fell out. What the heck? 2006 has offered some quality horror films. "Slither", "Feast" and "Saw 3" just to name some off the top of my head. "Room 6" is not one of them, so unless you spend most of your free time watching really crappy movies (like I obviously do), don't pick this one up.

I've watched a fair amount or horror movies and I know that a lot of them don't amount to much. Either they're not scary enough - sometimes to the point of being ridiculous and funny - or they're just lacking logic. What's the point of a complex and confusing story if the viewer never gets the answers? Also, there is a misconception that people watching horror movies (teenagers if you ask the studios) don't really care about cinematography, lighting etc. This is of course plain wrong. The classic horror movies are not scary only because of the visual effects etc but because of a skillful use of the mentioned qualities as well as music and tempo. Room 6 fails completely by these standards and is just a total waste of time (and money). There's no point to the story at all and it qualifies as one of the worst horror movies I have ever seen. It contains a beginning without intrigue (you're ready to switch off after 15 min), a middle with scary zombie looking people that appear here and there just to be scary, a lead character that spends most of the film running around screaming and an end that makes an embarrassing attempt to bring some logic to the story (and fails utterly). Why is it that studios invest in scripts like this one when there are so many talented young filmmakers out there with actual stories to tell?!? Don't watch this one - if you want to see something scary, just watch "The Ring" or something over again or better yet, a classic Hitchcock!

As the trailer shows, a woman and her boyfriend get into a car accident after which he is whisked away by unknown paramedics to an unknown hospital. From there the movie can be broken down in 2 major parts. For the first hour of the movie she struggles to find where he's being held and some haunting memories of hers are alluded to. The rest of the movie is comprised of her having to face her dark past if she wants to save her boyfriend from an uncertain fate. I say uncertain because the immediate danger to him is never made clear. The whole movie lacks the sense of desperation and urgency that horror movies depend on. It really felt like everyone involved was merely going through the motions in front of the camera. I never got attached to any of the characters. There is a twist at the end that should invoke an emotional response from the viewer but I felt nothing. The direction and camera work is lackluster, as is the make-up and special effects. The entire thing has a made for TV feeling attached to it, which isn't surprising given the cast. There are plenty of moments where the viewer is supposed to jump out of their seat but they are executed so poorly that I found myself looking at the flaws in the make-up and totally detached from the story. Believe me though, this isn't the worst movie ever made. I'd call it a good idea in a mediocre movie. You won't hate yourself for watching it, but there's plenty of better movies to watch first. Oh, and I love nudity as much as any other man but the one nude scene in the movie is so out of place I actually wish it had been taken out.

5/10 -- Mediocre

Amy Roberts (Christine Taylor) has a fear of hospitals and nightmares of being awake for surgery. Her boyfriend Nick (Shane Brolly) tries to propose but Amy is in a rush to get to school. Her student Melissa Norman (Chloë Grace Moretz) also has creepy dreams, but according to Melissa, she's not strong enough to help. She and Nick get into a car accident with another driver Lucas (Jerry O'Connell). The paramedics take Nick to the hospital but doesn't tell her where. She can't seem to find Nick anywhere. Lucas can't find his sister either when other paramedics take her to the mysterious St. Rosemary's hospital.

It's a lot of shrill screaming from Christine Taylor. There are a couple of good interesting actors like Mary Pat Gleason, but there are too many amateurs in this. That's what happens when you give strippers actual lines to read. Quite frankly, Shane Brolly isn't good enough to lead his part of the movie. Jerry O'Connell is too standoffish. He is too obvious and the twist is telegraphed.

The biggest problem is that this production just doesn't have the money behind it. It is a big ambitious horror done on the cheap. The monster makeup isn't that good. It looks even worst in the daylight. I can almost see the bigger, more grander movie that the script alludes to. This movie just doesn't look well put together.