Wife Swap

I am a fan of great television. I am very picky and have only enjoyed a relatively small amount of television shows. My favorite shows include Rome, Six Feet Under, Curb your Enthusiasm, X-files, Seinfeld and some others so I really insist on a certain entertainment quotient before I will allot precious time to television. I feel that Wife Swap is an amazing idea. This is what television is for, in my opinion, to learn about others and ourselves. The premise of this show is that two families switch wives for two weeks. The gimmick is that there is some theme of opposites in their lifestyle that will typically create conflict within the new families. Basically, it's watching people's abilities to compromise, change and accept others. What I really enjoy is when there is initial resistance to change, but through the universal opinion swaying process of "just give it a try" the families almost always end up taking a way a new habit or way of doing things from the swap. I love how this show highlights how inherently flexible and accepting children can be. Yes there are the examples of the children who model after their parents to be close-minded and not to connect but for the most part, the children manage to connect with their temporary mom. Emotions run high and it's really fun watching the tables turn during week 2. Some people claim it's the same idea over and over each week but it's always different people with their different smorgasbord of values. The hour flies by and it's really entertaining to see the variety of lifestyles in America.

Wife Swap was not something I was ever going to watch. I thought it was about sex. A friend said she watched it, explained what it was, and that piqued my interest. I enjoyed the fact that the families "traded" moms for 2 weeks. It gave enough time to see how everyone was doing things, and then implement the changes. I especially like the way the husband and wife teams talk after the show. The follow up is terrific, it is so uplifting and encouraging to see people's lives get better once they learn to appreciate what they have, and change what is wrong in their lives. I don't think any extra drama is needed. On one episode a knife was brought out and "Stu" the rabbit's life was under threat. I think this was dramatized a little to much, probably as a result of director intervention. I do not think this is necessary. What I like about the show is it is REAL, it is helpful to the parties involved and it is unique to American TV.

Network: ABC; Genre: Reality, Documentary; Content Rating: TV-PG (for language); Classification: Contemporary (star range: 1 - 4);

Season Reviewed: Series (season 1+)

"Wife Swap" is trash. Fortunately, it is also just one of those shows where you just have to describe the premise and the reason why becomes pretty clear. Which makes it easy on me. It is yet another network remake of a British reality series. Once again the uncreative Americans are stealing a brilliant idea from the Brits. A little sarcasm there.

No, "Wife Swap" isn't about free love and key parties. In it two families from completely opposite sides of the tracks swap the matriarch of their households and spend a week experiencing life through the eyes and living in the home of someone else. Someone that they would never come into contact with in their own lives. It's not a bad idea actually, particularly as a media answer to the media contrived notion that America is sharply polarized and that people only ensconce themselves in opinions that agree with their own. In reality though, it is shows like this that have really created that idea in the first place.

"Wife Swap" thinks that in order to maximize this concept the families that get swapped have to be as diametrically opposite from each other as humanly possible. Either that or it feels the swaps have to be so extreme that we, the audience out in the hinterlands, won't recognize it if it isn't spelled out in stark black and white for us. Real? Of course, they're real, but the show is wildly misrepresented. As an unintended consequence to that premise, everybody here is a fanatic that lives at the margin of whatever their belief system is. The difference between who is tired and who is funny is directly related to how often we see these clichés elsewhere on TV. On one hand we have the homophobic, fanatical Christians, boring, on the other hand we have the obnoxious deadbeat liberal who thinks "the U.S. should be drawn up on war crimes": funny. I particularly like a family who drinks coffee through a straw because there is a chance it will not stain their teeth.

Episode after episode appears to come down to the same suspicious broad conclusion in the end: the sloppy family is the one that is having fun and has found happiness; meanwhile the neat, organized family is too stifled, stressed, repressed and not having any fun. Filth = happiness, neat = uptight. Where on "The Bachelor" the catch phrase has become that all the women say "I can really see myself with him" after a few minutes on the show, the catch phrase deserving of parody on "Wife Swap" goes something like: "I can't imagine how a house this clean can have any love in it". At the end of the period the neat mother learns the all-valuable lesson of "loosening up" where the piggish family just goes back to roll in the mud. This negative correlation between cleanliness and happiness rings as a theme throughout the entire series. It is bizarre.

It is another one of those shows that claims to provide a service by promoting discussion, but the discussion it promotes is based on a false reality it, and other television like it, has inadvertently created. That everybody of any devout ideology lives at the fanatical margin of that ideology, that organization is repressive and filth means raising a heard of farm animals in your house. And I shouldn't even mention the "Oprah" demographic pandering afoot here. Like an Oprah episode, "Swap" is an exercise so that lazy bum husbands get to see how hard their wives work and finally learn to appreciate them. I'm not saying its inherently bad, its just typically predictable.

It can be mindless entertainment when it isn't completely unpleasant. The show is watchable, if only because there are far worse in the reality show genre. It is certainly better than its sleazy FOX rip-offs. We just need a little nuance to this one. There is no insight or deep lessons learned. While everybody says their lives where "changed forever" you always get the feeling they will go back to normal in about 2 weeks.

Bottom line: You would be a fool to take any of this seriously.

* * / 4

Some of these presentations are amusing; however, in my estimation, they don't possess the instructive value which the producers/directors seem to feel they portray.

For example, I saw two episodes today. The first had a beauty queen/late-sleeping princess type, whose husband did everything for her, swapping places with a gal obviously not into great concern over appearances (either hers or her home's), with a street performer husband with some sort of metal clips permanently installed in his forehead, permanent red striping on his face, and more tattoos than the typical NBA basket-baller.

As to grooming, the family of the former apparently spent more time applying cologne (even to the kids) after showering, than the latter group might be spending on an entire week's total grooming.

The second had the mom from a family of religious fanatics, and a son wearing a "Promise ring," swapping households with a gal in a self-styled "ultra liberal" family with a son and daughter, each proclaiming himself/herself, respectively, a "stud" and "wild child."

The problem with this show, particularly episodes like BOTH of these, is that I found no empathy for either family in both episodes. In both story lines, I wouldn't care to emulate any of their particular lifestyles,. Neither would I want to spend ANY time in any of these households.

A good way to view most of the folks in this series is to be thankful we don't live in a society dominated by any of these almost freakishly extreme families.

(4* because of the level of fascination provided. This is especially true in viewing how almost every one of the women, as well as their husbands, profess to have virtually every answer and piece of advice necessary to alter their counterparts' lives and families.)

Really. This show is the opposite of the Milgram Experiment, although at times it may seem as such.

Two couples (not necessarily heterosexual) exchange the presence of each of their wives between households for a period of 2 weeks. The first week, the temporary wife goes by the rules of the wife of the home she is staying in. The second week, the temporary wife gets to change the rules, which does not always go as planned.

There is conflict and insight in this show. Through the process of the wives and families assimilating to each other over the course of 2 weeks, we gain insight into these families and we gain insight into ourselves.

One great result of this show seems that both families seem forever changed in some way. They realize that there is more to life and that learning from another can benefit them. They do not always like the messenger, but they appreciate how their lives have benefited.

My greatest joys of this show are that stereotypes break down and we see that there is more love in the world than often meets the eye.