Minotauro

Just Another Poorly Made TV Movie.

A combination of poor script, minimal SFX, and wild over-acting by Todd and company make this a pretty sad take on the well-known myth. Corn syrup blood spews and there's a lot of noise. That's about it.

I did derive a bit of pleasure from trying to sort out all the different influences on Todd's portrayal of the "psycho" potentate. It's Frank Booth ("Blue Velvet") meets Thulsa Doom ("Conan the Barbarian"), with a bit of Jabba the Hutt thrown in for good measure. Until you've seen someone taking a "hit" off a cattle skull, you haven't seen good cinema.

There's some vague hope that things will pick up, until the victims are tossed into the labyrinth. From that point forward, it's a complete waste of time...typical monster-in-a-cave fare. You could probably make a drinking game out of it, though...everyone slams a shot whenever a foam rubber rock moves.

Save your time and rent "Jason and the Golden Fleece" or some other film that is at least a little entertaining.

In this take on the Minotaur story, Tom Hardy is cast as Theseus (called "Theo" for some reason), shipped off to the snowy shores of the Mediterranean to be stuck in labyrinth beneath the palace of Tony Todd.

I appreciate the effort to recast the Greek legend as a modern horror story about some hot teenagers wandering around in a cave with a gigantic bull seeking to kill them. As someone who actually read these stories and return to them occasionally, I am annoyed by the changes which serve no purpose. Why change the number of proposed sacrifices, and how often? Yes, I know. This movie was not made for me. Perhaps the changes render the story more meaningful to its intended audience on the Sci-Fi Channel in some manner I do not understand.

Years ago, the people grew so greedy and hedonistic that they were no longer satisfied with worshiping a mythical god, so the Queen had sex with a bull and produced the Minotaur. Didn't turn out so good, a few deaths were involved, and the creature was placed in a labyrinth beneath the palace. Now every third year eight people are cast into the labyrinth as a sacrifice.

This had surprisingly high production values for a Sci-Fi original. All the sets were quite nicely done, and even the Minotaur looked very good. On the bad side, the characters just didn't have much character, nor screen presence, and it got pretty boring towards the middle. The worst part was that, when trapped in a series of caves with a killer critter, what would a person do? Perhaps be quiet so as not to attract the attention of the beast? Not these folks. The main character especially seems almost incapable of grasping the situation; He yells at the top of his lungs on numerous occasions. Once, the Minotaur is only a few feet away and the guy still can't shut up. He's also convinced that his girlfriend, who was sacrificed three years earlier, might still be alive somehow. I couldn't quite figure out how anyone could be so dumb as to believe such a thing. There's also a woman who screams a lot - not just a regular scream, but a long, long scream. Maybe ten seconds in duration. That's a real joy to listen to.

Two of the more entertaining characters are the high priest and priestess who are in charge of the kingdom. The priest likes smoking from a bull skull, and wants to get it on with the priestess. Seeing that she's his sister, she's rather cool on the idea, and jumps into the labyrinth as well. She's about the only interesting person down there. And one of the few people who speaks in such a manner that you can understand her. I missed a lot of mumbled dialog in this movie, but I don't think it served much purpose anyway.

Overall, I think the Sci-Fi Channel may be getting a little better at movie making (they've certainly had enough practice). This one was almost good.

A loose retelling of the Greek myth of Theseus and the Minotaur.

With so many terrible bad films having been made over the last 15 years or so it's actually worth revisiting director Jonathan English offering. Not just because Tom Hardy has since become a star but it's one of the few Minotaur films out there, which is a shame given it's such a great myth.

It could be pacer and less would have been scarier for the monster design. The sets, costume and score are impressive and the cast features the likes of Tony Todd, (Hammer Horror legend) Ingrid Pitt and Blade Runner's Rutger Hauer.

It is average monster movie but it's certainly worth a look.

Welcome to the CITIZEN KANE of Sci-Fi Channel movies. Not that MINOTAUR is faultless. It's just competent on so many more levels than your average Sci Fi-Schlock Fest that it appears great in comparison.

We have some actual acting going on. Granted, there is some great scenery chewing, but it's on a grand scale. There are some good effects. There are some epic looking landscapes and the occasional set. And the script and direction are actually acceptable.

On the down side, there's the same CGI overkill that seems to haunt every Sci Fi monster flick. Thankfully, this is kept to a minimum. We're also stuck in the same labyrinth/cave sets for way too long. And every so often I couldn't help feeling that plot points were being cribbed from a Terry Jones film.

But these are minor quibbles. There's some attempt here to breathe life into the monster on the loose genre. Not bad at all.