Starting Over

I just wanted to say that the show rapidly went downhill after the move to California AND RANA was not expendable. She was much more real than Iyanla. I knew that show was in trouble from the opening screen shots where they show Iyanla with a tear ... supposedly real ... running down her cheek. The artificiality of it used to drive me insane! I am half-black, so race is not my issue here. I could not believe how warm and loving the life coaches could be on a day-to-day basis, and then just rip the poor women to shreds during the Board of Review. This show slowly but steadily began to concentrate more on what would make great television and keep the ratings up. I smelled a rat when the cause of the amnesia victim's loss of memory was never explained - hinted at - but never explained. This show should have stuck to the original formula; i.e. if you want to be on television, live for free for a minimum of six weeks, then there can be no holds barred, respecting, of course, the identify of close friends and relatives. And I'm sorry - I tried to like Dr. Stan but I could never really "get" him, or figure out what earthly purpose he actually served by being on the show. Alas, it's too late and my thoughts are all for naught because a sounding board for the viewers should have been made available from the get-go. Rest in peace, Rhonda; rest in peace. And Rana, you were gone but never forgotten.

I agree that Iyanla can be a bit opinionated, but that other one --Rhonda--

Could she possibly be more self-righteous? Meanwhile, she never really listens to what anyone is saying. Did she take a Learning Annex class in "5 Steps to Being a Good Listener"? Maybe it was a prerequisite course to "You Too Can Be an Analyst" She asks clearly scripted questions, nods with a furrowed brow during the girls responses and follows it with a "ya" and a quote directly off one of those motivational posters.

Example: In the last episode ... Rhonda starts using all the clichés and textbook inspirational quotes to this one woman who was really going through it badly. She takes her through this ridiculous word association thing to arrive at the conclusion that her father is the cause of all her woes (which had already been established anyway, by the woman herself). Rhonda gives an understanding "Ya" and sits all self-satisfied that she broke her. Then Iyanla proceeds to rip the girl apart, saying that she is lying and covering up the real issue and makes her come to terms with the fact that her mother is really at the root of it all but she never could face or admit to herself. After 10 minutes of Iyanla tearing down layer after layer, lie after lie, the girl is obviously a wreck and then Rhonda chimes in with this pearl: "Its OK for your mother to not always be right" smiling smugly as though she knew the mother was the real issue all along. Iyanla looked like 'is she kidding with this'???

Rhonda seems to feel that she and Iyanla simply have different styles of therapy --- yea qualified and not qualified is the difference. She looks like a soap actress wannabe who never quite got her break but decided to put this show together and trying to act like a therapist. A bad one.

If you turn off the testosterone, STARTING OVER can be a real treat. Especially if you are unemployed.

The show centers around woman that need to make changes in their lives and have come to a special house to start over. Nonethless, in order to start over, the woman must perform a serious of exercises under the supervision of Life Coaches. And, don't giggle, these coaches mean business. At one point, I tuned in to see a woman sitting in a cage.

Either way, I was able to overcome preconceived notions and indulge in the individual quest of each participant. I also became extremely fond of a woman Christina. A single mother of one and former show girl, she finally graduated the house and established herself as a woman of honor.

I'm Karen Knox-Cox, of Starting Over, season one. I love to read all the comments on this show. What a wonderful life experience it was. It did not change my life, but it certainly gave me a chance to re-direct my life. I am proud to be a part of a show, that obviously touch so many lives. I always said I'm the luckiest girl in the world! I too, agree, that the show lost a certain something after the first year. Replacing Rona,was the shows first down fall. With the first season, the women in the house, had no idea what to expect. The second year, it seemed the women in the house,"knew what the show needed", so it was not as natural. That is sad, because most of the women needed, some type of help. I think Starting Over could have survived longer, had they replaced the coaches on a regular basis...keeping it fresh.

I started out watching starting over during it's first season in 2003. For some reason there are certain episodes that are not available and I have no idea why. So I cannot re-watch some of the episodes I found most interesting.

I truly prefer the earlier seasons when Rana Walker was a Life Coach and the house was in Chicago. The move to California was just fine. However, I do not understand why Rana was replaced. She was genuinely kind, compassionate, nurturing, caring, inspiring and EVERYTHING those ladies needed in a life coach. Not ONCE did she ever resort to BULLYING, INSULTING, MOCKING, DEGRADING or EXPLOITING any of the women in the house.

I can only find episodes from season three online. Season three is very hard to watch. There's also an episode from Audrey and Brenda Starr's season that I wanted to see but it never aired. It's also not available online. Why that is only Bunim-Murray Productions knows.

The counseling sessions in the California house were truly teeth grinding to watch and hard to endure. My heart truly went out to Tess. I don't think she was a bad person at all. I think she was just super defensive because she had a lot of pint up hurt and frustration from being taken advantage of and having people spit on her kindness and throw it back in her face. I used to be that way myself as I too know the pain of my kindness being taken as "weakness" by those of lesser character.

It was also difficult to watch some of the other women in the house misunderstand her and put her on trial for PRACTICALLY everything she said and did. I honestly lost all respect for Meg when she questioned why Tess was wearing her headphones while cleaning the kitchen. Maybe she wanted to listen to music to UPLIFT herself as she felt like a black sheep who constantly needed to tiptoe around the other women jumping on her case every other day about the pettiest of issues and the two insensitive Life Coaches joining in with them.

God bless her. Cause regardless of what my Husband thought I would have left that house in the middle of the night after the first gang up session. Had Rana been there, I think things would have gone a lot more smoothly for Tess and she would have felt as if she had at least ONE good ally on her side. Poor girl.

I know she's glad it's all over and I hope she's doing great. There are some truly great Counselors and Life Coaches in the world(Rana Walker especially). However, some of them can be very know-it-all and uppity at times as the Starting Over experience proved. They don't perceive themselves as having a God-complex though many of them do.