Ham & Cheese

This movie came out at blockbuster across the street from me like a week ago and Wednesday night I saw it in the used bin for $6.99. I never heard of it but it had Dave Foley and Scott Thompson in it so I thought I would give it a try. I asked the guy behind the counter why it was for sale so quickly and he said they've only been renting one copy per night at most anyway. Still I bought it to see Dave Foley and Scott Thompson and besides Blockbuster has a special right now for 2 movies for $12 and I was already buying "Rise of the Phoenix".

It was a mistake, I should have listened to the employee. Especially when the employee at Blockbuster admits a movie is really bad, that must mean the movie is REALLY bad, and it was. I should have listened to the voice in my head saying "turn this movie off, it's horrible and won't get better" but I didn't. Dave Foley and Scott Thompson were both all right, but the movie's plot was pretty bad and none of the other characters were very good, especially the two leads and most especially the fat one. This might be the worst movie I've ever seen. If you watch it, wait until it's on T.V. for free.

2/10 (I have to give KITH members at least one point each!)

I am ashamed to have to call this movie Canadian. It was a conglomeration of bad script, worse actors, and no humour at all. I only watched it (okay, truthfully I couldn't take it anymore and walked out with still 15 minutes left)because a couple of friends wanted to watch, and because there were a couple of "Kids in the Hall" alumni listed as main actors. By the way, my cohorts didn't find it funny, thought provoking or even mildly entertaining, either. I consider myself a huge fan of B movies (even some "C" movies), but I have never before watched a movie that I walked away from resenting the time wasted that could have been spent....I don't know....ripping my toenails out by the roots and enjoying it more.

This movie was terrible. I don't understand how so many people are leaving such good messages on this unless it is because they are family of the cast and crew. It was obviously wrote in about ten minutes and thrown together with cheap camcorders and actors who couldn't do anything worth being paid. The story is predictable and stupid with characters that aren't even likable. I have seen many worst movies so I give this a 2 out of 10 because its still terrible. Not a good way to waste an afternoon you are better off watching something else even if this is on TV for free sometime. Defanitely not worth paying to see at the movies- trust me on that one! The weighted IMDb rating is right on for this film at between 2 to 4 out of ten.

For someone to bully-pick on this film, calling it terribly acted or weak, is someone who can't possibly know the first thing about film making and/or is totally missing the point. Of course it's bad, it's SUPPOSED to be bad! But the idea is that it's so bad it's lovable. The Variety reviewer said it best (and I quote verbatim): "A mockumentary that rarely lets up in the laugh department, "Ham & Cheese" is a must-see for anyone with the smallest thesping aspirations. High degree of face recognition with veterans of "Kids in the Hall" and other northland tube shows on board, probably means that a vid-shot effort would be worth a film transfer for distribs looking to take a change on a potential cult classic." This was NOT shot on camcorders and written in 10 minutes, as it would not have even qualified for a Variety review, let alone be able to amuse countless festival audiences that it did...

And just so that I am keeping it completely honest, I do think that the production of Richard's play overstays its welcome in the storyline, but that's about the only aspect that falls flat in the entire movie. Otherwise, how could one not help but cheer for these funny underdogs with a dream? I don't suppose that the one person I've seen giving harsh comment on Ham & Cheese liked The 40 Year Old Virgin, either? Lighten up!

To put this film in perspective you must understand this about Canadian film: stories like this don't get made here. Stories about sex with the dead or badly maimed? Sure. Stories about allegedly charming Maritimers? Definitely. Stories about sex with allegedly charming dead Maritimers? Well, not yet, but just wait. Which is to say that although this country churns out more than its fair share of world-class comedians such as Mike Myers, Jim Carrey, Martin Short and the late John Candy, we don't make movies that showcase this talent. So Ham & Cheese gets full marks for attempting something so bold as a mockumentary in a land where government-funded agencies favour creepy. That said, thinking back on some of the scenes in H & C, there's plenty of creepy here. Such as the scenes in which Mike Beaver's character joins a fringe festival acting troupe, which includes a cancer patient, a silent fat guy and the omnisexual leader. Seriously whacked out stuff — having sex with the earth? I would argue Beaver's story and performance, though the guy has that lovable lug thing going, is the weaker of the two, falling back on Waiting for Guffman-like parody. Beaver's choice to play the guy as a Lennyesque retard backfires, the character is more pathetic than funny. On the other hand, Jason Jones should be coming to a American theatre soon. He's that good. His performance seems to fit between old Harry Shearer SNL skits and Steve Carell in Anchorman. There are a few scenes — the one in which he auditions for a mattress ad using an Aussie accent and the one in which he plays an extra on a cop drama — are particularly memorable. They also seem to bring out the best film-making — the director edits them to maximum effect, and finds a happy medium between funny and sad. Kudos also to the filmmakers for paying attention to detail. At the beginning of Mike Beaver's story there is a shot of a poorly punctuated wooden lawn sign that is indicative of the culture of small-city Ontario — The Wolanski's. Perfect. The picture also transcends its genre and has something to say about the acting craft and show business, and what it has to say is ppppmph!