Tubarões 3

If you enjoy B-movies, this is one for you, plenty of nudity, a Tom Cruise look-a-like and even more stock shark footage. If that's not enough, the lead lady was actually in the first Shark Attack movie as a different character. This one makes me want to see the other two with my friends and laugh until I get sick. You really can appreciate a movie like this if you were an avid MST3K watcher. Oh yeah, contains the CORNIEST LINE EVER! You will not miss it, trust me.

This movie is pretty much at the top of the bad movie food chain. I laughed at literally every scene, I don't know how they managed to make a simple thing like the hero typing an email funny but they did.

The first thing you notice about the movie is the shark is either shown as shark footage (which is fair enough) or something that looks like it was made in Microsoft paint. I'm guessing bad actors are drawn to bad scripts like sharks to chum and this chum is especially fishy. Witness the security guard who just has to say a couple of simple lines but is quite clearly reading from a cue card he can't quite see. Most movies would cut him out, especially as the scene is pointless.

I also especially liked the helicopter pilot, if a man doesn't twitch a muscle at the sight of a 100ft shark then it's hard to imagine anything in life really moving him. Maybe he's just feeling down because his helicopter is quite clearly a toy or maybe he's just bemused because the shark grunts like a pig throughout the film.

The best scene doesn't involve the shark at all. They're stood on the beach and our hero delivers one of the worst lines ever written. If you've seen the movie you know the one, if not then you have the right to discover the beauty of it yourself.

Probably the funniest film ever made, no bad movie shelf is complete without it. Fingers crossed they make another one with the exact same cast and writer.

I watched this film a couple of nights ago and found it positively hysterical. It feels like either a really good spoof of Jaws (and lets face it, how many good spoofs do we get nowadays?) or a completely awful rip off of Jaws. From the very first scene with the cigar-chomping incomprehensible sailor guy to the magical size changing shark I was rolling around on the floor laughing. There are actors who look like they are laughing when they are supposed to be crying, there are random bikini girls who strut by during most of the talking scenes, and I haven't even started on the gems in the script (I won't spoil any of it, but it's safe to say: If you know anyone who talks like this in day to day life, please slap them). You have to see this movie.

If you ever had doubts of a cinematic higher power this is your proof. For surely such a perfect movie could not exist with the limited abilities of mere mortals.

I applaud you Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Bravo. Had I been in charge I probably would have called it quits thinking I could never top the super smash hit Shark Attack 2, but you prove me to be a fool.

Number one: The Chemistry between Barrowman and McShane...WOW!!! Like a modern day Romeo and Juliet these two decide to take on a shark that ranges from 10 feet or so to a whopping 900 feet. Roy Scheider should be ashamed of himself. Jaws was an okay movie, but he is certainly no Barrowman, far from it. With love on the line, I don't think I could be the man Barrowman is. He truly is a hero among heroes.

And let us not forget Viktor Chichov's unforgetable performance as "Male Tourist". Viktor hammers home the point that there are no small parts.

With mind boggling effects that will blow you away, Shark Attack 3 is without a doubt the greatest Shark movie ever.

Tracy and Hepburn got nothing on Barrowman and McShane. I can only pray there is a Shark Attack 4.

I really don't think I've ever seen a film that was worse than this one. At the piece of dialogue that is commonly referred to as 'THE LINE' I actually HAD to call my friend with whom I've seen lots of movies lately. I told him what the movie was about and we watched the finale 'together', him on the phone, me doing the live reporting from behind the screen. Laughing out loud almost all the time.

I don't think there's a single one of this films atrocities left that hasn't already been commented on, but it really keeps you roaring with laughter the whole 90 minutes. Oh... maybe there is something I didn't hear anybody rant about. The marlin footage. Was that seventies? Sixties maybe? Was it even in color? And really... What was that guy having sex for? And did I really pick up the suggestion that that woman was his fathers (?) wife???