The Stanley Baxter Picture Show

Stanley Baxter is often described as a 'comedian' or an 'impressionist', but I don't consider either of those terms to be an accurate description of him. As a comedian, he isn't very funny. He is best known for his vast number of celebrity impersonations, male and -- especially -- female. In the 1970s, Baxter briefly incurred the wrath of the British public when he impersonated HRH Queen Elizabeth on television. However, the scandal blew over when people realised that the impersonation was not vicious, and the whole affair evaporated when it was learnt that Her Majesty had enjoyed the 'tribute'. (Thus proving you've got no taste, Ma'am.)

In "The Stanley Baxter Picture Show", the funniest joke occurs when Baxter, in costume as a cavalry officer and apparently on horseback (his mount is out of frame), decides to ask a question to his batman. (American viewers won't recognise this term; a batman is a British officer's orderly who serves as his valet ... not to be confused with a batsman, as in cricket.) The officer takes a telephone out of his saddle, and rings his orderly. Cut to a shot of Baxter again, in slightly different costume, on horseback in the same parade, as he takes a 'phone out of his saddle and answers the call. Cut back to the first Baxter as he asks: 'Hello, batman? Robin here.' Ha bloody ha. The elaborate set-up isn't worth the weak payoff.

Baxter is allegedly an impressionist, but he pales in comparison to a true genius of that form such as Rich Little (or even Joe Baker). Without any props or elaborate costumes, Rich Little has an astonishing ability to get into the *soul* of the celebrity whom he's imitating. Baxter, on the other hand, tends to look and sound the same in all of his 'impressions', and he's forced to rely on elaborate costumes and production numbers. Nearly all of his characters speak in the same Glesga accent, and his 'female' characters are even less convincingly female than Monty Python's Pepperpot women.

Baxter always seems to perform his male roles as if he's in a big hurry to get back into a frock for his next female role. He tends to play larger-than-life showbiz divas, especially musical performers. I give Baxter some credit for having bottle enough to dress up as Shirley Temple, but Baxter utterly fails to capture any of the magic that made Little Shirley a superstar: he's simply a middle-aged man cozzied up as a little girl, larking about in a wig and a frock. I'd rather squizz at Grayson Perry.

Like Bottom in 'A Midsummer Night's Dream', Baxter wants to play ALL the roles. We see him here in a sketch parody of 'Upstairs, Downstairs', with Baxter playing all the characters in the same scene. His production budget won't pay for the process photography that would enable multiple Baxters to appear in the same shot ... so the camera is constantly cutting from a tight close-up of Baxter in one costume to a tight close-up of Baxter in another costume. There's never any interaction between the characters, and the device is wearying. Baxter as Gordon Jackson is only barely distinguishable from Baxter as Angela Baddeley.

In "The Stanley Baxter Picture Show", we see Baxter kitted out as Liza Minnelli, chanting (not singing) a parody lyric: 'Liza with a Zee, not Judy with a J, 'cos Judy with a J is Ma, not me,' I'm no fan of Minnelli, but this sort of mockery is just cheap baiting. It also calls attention to the fact that Baxter can't sing at all, and certainly not on a level to compare with Minnelli's. He can't dance either (not even with Shirley Temple's level of skill), so the production numbers are staged to camouflage the absence of any actual dancing.

Some of Baxter's drag humour is just too gay for me. At one point in this series, an offscreen announcer breathlessly heralds the arrival of a legendary movie actress. We know that this 'actress' is just going to be Baxter in drag, so we're not eager to see her. But then the camera shows an extremely tight close-up of a low-cut hemline, revealing some genuine cleavage. How did male performer Baxter manage to acquire some cleavage? We learn the dreadful answer as the camera pulls away to reveal Baxter standing with his back to the camera ... aye, it's his REAR cleavage we've been looking at. His builder's crack! Now Baxter turns towards the camera, displaying the usual pair of falsies and a bad makeup job. Even Milton Berle did this stuff better. British audiences will have seen Danny La Rue, whose drag routines are much funnier than Baxter's, and whose female impersonations are much more impressive than Baxter's ... so I'm baffled by Baxter's appeal, given the easy access to funnier (and more convincing) female impersonators.

I'll rate Stanley Baxter's entire showbiz career barely one point out of 10. Still, he seems to be enjoyed by a lot of blue-rinsed old ladies. Including Brenda.