Arachnid

Arachnid is a pretty good movie which follows the similar sci-fi mutated monster style of film in the tradition of Critters, Anaconda, etc. We have a group of humans who are trying to survive against a species of alien spider, which is done up by better than average special effects. The group of humans are interesting, consisting of a female pilot, a spider researcher, two medical people, some soldiers, and some island natives. It's like Survivor with spiders! Much of the film consists of build up, with a bit of gore dropped in every so often. Unless you are terrified of spiders, this film won't scare you at all.

I can't say enough of things about Alex Reid, who plays Mercer, the lead female heroine. She is incredibly attractive and sexy. Most of the film she is dressed a la Tomb Raider style, if not less. I believe this is the only film she has done so far but hopefully, we can see more in the future. Forget the spiders, watch the film for her!

I recommend this film not only for Alex Reid but because the special effects are decent, and it always fun to see who will survive against the monster.

I don't mind admitting that spiders freak me out and the idea of flesh burrowing parasites....well, they make my skin crawl. So it's not surprising that big bug creature features are amongst my favourite horror movies; they can unsettle me without even trying.

Arachnid, produced by Brian Yuzna and directed by Jack Sholder (who helmed the fun flick The Hidden and the abysmal Nightmare on Elm Street 2) is a 'by-the-numbers' effort which, despite being extremely predictable, entertains with its impressive (and often yucky) effects by Steve Johnson.

When a UFO explodes over some South Pacific islands, a deadly creature is let loose which causes havoc amongst the natives. A team of scientists are sent to investigate and are soon fighting for their lives against a mutant monster that is part alien and part spider.

Chock full of clichés, Sholder's low budget bug-fest isn't going to win any awards for originality and doesn't make a lot of sense, but with its attractive spunky heroine Mercer (Alex Reid), busty doctor (Neus Asensi) and its (sometimes, quite literally) eye-popping gore, I found it to be a reasonably entertaining monster movie.

Arachnid: 7 of 10: Maybe it's the puppets that I liked. It's nice to see a movie made in the 21st century that doesn't use horrible shiny CGI for its creatures. (It does use horrible shiny CGI for it's alien spaceships.) Arachnid is all the better for it's retro monster.

This is a true six-pack toke 'm if you got them B movie. A European production with decent location shooting, an international cast (half horrible and unintelligibly dubbed), and a real B movie budget unlike those $10 Z movie digital camcorder pretenders.

It's all off course a bit predictable. (If you can't figure out two of the survivors at the end turn in your monster movie-watching card now.) And despite a lot of fodder (always a good sign) to many deaths seem off screen or at least over a little quickly. The movie also could have used some gratuitous nudity (If young thing Alex Reid wasn't willing at least allow Spanish star Neus Asensi to release those puppies like she has done in the past.)

Those quibbles aside I couldn't help but cheer when the puppeteers took the Volkswagen sized spider out for the spin in the second half of the movie. Of course you enjoyment may depend on what you consumed during the first half.

This movie features bad special effects in some areas, and pretty good ones in others. The idea had a lot more potential than the script delivered. Not an edge of your seat movie, and several things did not hold together; don't waste your money. On the other hand, if it comes on the late show or you have a free movie rental coupon, it's worth a look.

Arachnid (2001) 4 out of 10 stars Time to Read: 2:20 min

BASIC PLOT: A pilot, some scientists, a few natives, and some mercenaries, go into the jungle... They all go for different reasons, but they all find the same thing. It's death, and it's form is arachnid!

WHAT WORKS: *SPECIAL EFFECTS ARE AWESOME! For a low budget monster movie, I was impressed by the sophistication of the special effects. They are good enough to be believed, and there's not too much CGI, and what there is really works. It's definitely a throwback to old school monster movies, and that's a good thing!

*DR LEON'S VOICE IS AWESOME! José Sancho has the most beautiful voice, it's like cotton candy to my ears. I could listen to him talk for hours, he should do books on tape.

WHAT DOESN'T WORK: *LOREN MERCER IS A B*TCH Mercer's (Alex Reid) insipid whining makes her the most unlikable character, but we're supposed to believe Valentine (Chris Potter) is attracted to her? Why? There's no reason why he would be, so a lot of the movie doesn't make sense.

*DR. LEON'S CONSTANT SQUABBLING WITH MERCER HAS NO POINT It also doesn't make sense. Yeah, she's a b*tch, but there's never a real reason given as to why they are always fighting.

*THE SOUND IS TERRIBLE especially in the opening scenes. I don't know if this was just on the platform I was using (Tubi), or if it's that way on the DVD too, parts were almost unwatchable.

*IT FEELS LIKE THE NATIVES ARE JUST HERE TO GET ATE and that's not cool.

*WHY DOES SUSANA SUDDENLY FREAK OUT, when she's been chill as a cucumber for the entire movie? It's stupid! Susana (Neus Asensi) has been the voice of reason, putting Mercer in her place, and remaining calm when no one else does, throughout the entire movie. Why then, would she suddenly freak out, and run screaming into danger?

*HENRY CAPRI - ARACHNOLOGIST, SHOULD HAVE MADE IT Henry Capri (Ravil Isyanov), the quirky spider guy, who looks like Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley (1976), should have made it. It seems like throughout the movie, the people you want to make it, don't, and the people who irritate you, do.

*THEY KILL THE MAMA SPIDER, but leave the eggs, soon to hatch into babies? Capri says if only one gets loose, it could destroy the human race, but they go off and leave 100's of eggs, when they could just as easily set them on fire. WTH?

TO RECOMMEND, OR NOT TO RECOMMEND, THAT IS THE QUESTION: *This is a remake of the 1957 Lon Chaney Jr. Classic, A Maldição do Monstro Sinistro (1957), (available on Tubi). If you like monster movies, I'd recommend watching both, so you can compare. They both are very low budget, but that's part of the fun. The special effects in Arachnid (2001) are much better than they should be, elevating it out of obscurity. It's a fun way to turn your brain off, but only watch and rate if you enjoy silly, low budget, monster fun. If not, go listen to NPR, or something.

CLOSING NOTES: *THIS IS A LOW BUDGET MONSTER MOVIE, please keep that in mind before you watch/rate it. These types of movies have a much lower budgets, and so your expectations should be adjusted.

*I HAVE NO CONNECTION TO THE FILM, or production in ANY way. This review was NOT written in full, or in part, by a bot. I am just an honest viewer, who wishes for more straight forward reviews (less trolls and fanboys), and better entertainment. Hope I helped you out.