Beneath Loch Ness

My local movie house are showing this film which frankly is an insult to movie-goers as it is so bad its not even worth a video release. The title tells you what its about and watching it gives the impression it was made up as it went along. The acting is dreadful especially from the lady playing the blond news producer. In fact to show the contempt that the the movie makers have for the viewing public they don't even bother about people with Irish accents pretending to be Scottish. This film has no humour, no imagination, and no thrills. To call it a 'B' picture would be an insult to that genre.

This was easily one of the worst movies I have ever seen. Forget the fact that the storyline was absolutly pathetic, the acting was ten times worse! How about those accents? Whatever they were, they certainly were not Scottish. The special effects were equally terrible, espcially the "underwater" shots, which look like they were made in an ordinary dark, smokey room. If you have yet to see this film, do yourself a favor and do not even consider renting it. For the unfortunate ones out there who have seen this, I feel your pain.

This had to be one of the biggest wastes of celluloid of all time(next to that Blair Witch thing). Blockbuster should be made to refund the money of those who thought they were renting a movie. The same, old plot devices were used (i.e. the idiot mayor/constable refusing to close the beach/loch at the height of tourist season, a smaller animal caught that was not the right one, the crusty old sea captain/fisherman with a score to settle ). I swear, I think someone even used the phrase "this was no boating accident". If Speilburg and Blatty didn't sue these guys for blatant plagerism and or copyright infringment, they should have. On the suck scale of one to five vacumn cleaners,(5 being the worst), this gets a seven.

I was so excited to see this video at Blockbuster. Having visited Loch Ness and loving monster stories, I was looking forward to seeing scenes of Scotland (blink and you miss them), hearing Scottish accents (terrible), and enjoying a campy monster movie (strike three - you're out). I found the portrayal of the local Scots to be totally insulting. The movie wasn't campy, just bad. Obviously a play-by-play rip off of JAWS.

I would be willing to watch it again if I were with the same friends who studied in Scotland with me and we were rip-roaring drunk. That way we could make fun of it together.

This film was a very poor effort.

The storyline followed that of "Jaws" quite closely, The experts who no one would believe, the constable who was more concerned with the tourist trade, remember the Mayor in Jaws, wouldn't close the loch.

A really big bad sea creature, Patrick Bergin as a dedicated lunatic trying to kill it, Remember Quint from Jaws.

The storyline was thin, had nothing original, and was more ridiculous than thrilling.

The dialogue coaches, however, are a totally different matter. They should be taken as far away from Hollywood as possible, and never let near the place again. The accents were shockingly bad, perhaps the worst I have heard in a film, James Doohan as Scotty, in Star Trek was a John Geilgud performance compared to this. The accents made the film funny and silly were is should not have been.

In truth, the accents were more Northern Irish than Scottish, try to think of Liam Neeson talking with a clothes peg on his nose and you'll get the idea.

It is apparant, that this was a really low budget, badly thought out, badly prepared attempt at film making, I would suggest that a few of the correspondants in this forum could get together for a week or so, have a few beers and come up with something a lot better.

In all, a bit of a waste of videotape really.