Large

This has to be the worst film I have ever seen. There is about 5-10 seconds of entertainment in the whole thing. The story is all over the place for a start, characters paper tin, actors mis-cast. Very un-engaging, painful to watch, unoriginal. It's been lit awful, shot awful. It is the worst film I have ever seen. The director has created a film that I will never forget until the day I die.

Oh dear. An hour into this film I walked out (something I have never done before while at the cinema) because I couldn't have cared less about it. The performances were stale, the premise done before and the jokes were unoriginal. I don't think I smiled once let alone laugh. This film is an absolute waste of time. Avoid.

There are no large laughs at all in this one, nor are there any minor ones even. A frantic comedy which goes for all the cheap gags, none of which work. Approximately the "Great Race" and "American Virgin" school of comedy, except that this isn't so much a school as a kindergarten for the mentally-challenged. Only the manic speed and fast editing prevent this from being unwatchable - and some pretty girls. A slightly annoying thing about this movie is that we have scenes like a dog licking a girl's vagina or another girl giving a guy a hand-job - and yet no breasts!! So it's okay to have bestiality and masturbation, but when faced with having one of those girls show some skin they suddenly got very British about it, it would seem. There is no nudity at all, but in my opinion a movie as tasteless as this (not necessarily a criticism) should at least go all the way. An amazing thing about this movie is that it is based on a book - or vice versa (irrelevant); how can this nonsense exist in written form? Must be voodoo

I suppose it was my own fault, expecting something worthwhile, from a film that was funded, in part by FilmFour. I was not expecting, however to be crawling with embarrassment by the end of it. I can only assume that Justin Edgar is a big Tom Sharpe fan, since he used so many of his scenarios - the drugged dog being ever so reminiscent of "The Throwback" etc. etc. The sets were impressive enough and the filming although patchy, evoked enough atmosphere, but "Trainspotting" in Birmingham, this was not. The dragging up of B list celebrities did nothing for the standard of acting either - over the top, or in the case of the lead, Luke De Woolfson virtually non-existent, as he looked constantly surprised to be there at all. There are certainly some very funny moments, but none of them very original - like knowing the punch line to a joke while someone is telling it, the laugh is automatic. I'd like to have something clever to say, to sum it all up, but I'd rather just try and forget that I payed money to see it.

Prurient teen rubbish at its absolute worst. Abysmal acting, script, plot......just about everything was dire.

So why did they make it and what sort of cretin would like this? Search me. I've seen risqué, blue and filthy comedy done well.....sometimes i seek them out as it CAN be funny. This wasn't funny for a moment.

Then there's the Brummie accents. Sweet Jesus. Absolutely awful, barring one lad who i think IS a native of that city.

Don't bother with this tripe. I did (for an hour so far) and it's an hour i've wasted.

Oh, and i expected more of Morwenna Banks who is better than this piffle.