Blue Money

I don't know about other reviewers but I thought this sleazy skin flick was absolutely awful. Like other Crown International Pictures from the era such as CINDY AND DONNA, this is a near plot less affair of simulated sex between unappealing actors with a few dramatic elements thrown into the mix.

The main character is a sleazy porn producer who falls for one of his own actresses. They attempt to get out of the business, but various stuff gets in the way. The whole film has a tired, cheap look to it, the characters are horrendous, and it's about unerotic as it gets. Viewers looking for genuinely sleazy fare will also be disappointed as films like this are oddly tame considering the shocking depravity that a lot of horror films were delving into during the same era (I'm thinking of THE EXORCIST and THE Texas CHAINSAW MASSACRE as an example).

French-Canadian man (Patrick) does his best to secure his young family the freedom and future they crave aboard the boat he's lovingly restoring, on an income derived from his work as an adult film-maker. But the pressures of the business and political crackdowns take their toll forcing his wife (Caron) to leave their rented pad while Patrick frantically attempts to get his last few movies in the can to finance their dream and rid the family of their ignominious past.

Patrick stars and directs this low-key drama in which his central character goes from porn-artist to money-hungry assembly line producer, turning would-be starlets into harlots to feed his freedom frenzy. Caron as his pot-smoking former actress wife protests a lot, but never seems to have the conviction to make a lasting stand against his chosen "profession", manacled by the material trappings and constant promise of a better life aboard the grand ship freedom, where they plan to sail the seven seas, trading coconuts and trinkets, smoking dope, drinking wine and living the dream. Jeff Gall is suitably sleazy as Patrick's partner and enthusiastic co-producer, while Gary Kent is a familiar face and voice in a small role as a vice detective.

Some humour (the quirky auditions should make you chuckle), lots of bare flesh and simulated sex (as you'd expect) and a manuscript full of dumb dialogue ("you can't come to work when you've got your period") the film never really hits the high notes, remaining low-key and melodramatic, like a balloon fizzling to its limp conclusion, which is especially disappointing, leaving little resolved. Looks a little experimental and obviously dabbles in a taboo subject particularly in its era and political context, might be worth a look if you can appreciate B-grade trash cinema.

I have to confess that I haven't seen that many true pornographic films, because what I've seen has left me both bored and depressed. However, I have enjoyed a number of movies that have dealt with the pornographic industry, from "Boogie Nights" to "Orgazmo". "Blue Money" could have been another interesting look at the industry, since it deals with the porn film industry when it was starting to become mainstream yet still falling afoul of the law. However, it is a crushing bore. There's very little story, and it's stretched out way past the breaking point. The characters aren't very interesting as well. If you are thinking of watching the movie anyway to see sex or nudity, let me warn you that there isn't a terrible amount of this material, and the little there is isn't presented in an erotic light. I have no idea why Crown-International picked this up for distribution, because it's unlike their usual product, which usually made an effort to deliver the goods. I guess there is some curio value, but not enough to make it worth searching for.

{as a movie, it sucks, worth not even a 2, but the two female leads are so, so pretty, it is worth watching}

I'm just passing through the "Dangerous Babes" box-set because of having seen one of the other movies back in the day. I'd never heard of any of the other lot, and do not expect much.

BLUE MONEY deals with the porn industry. The vice police are staking out a suspect back in the days during the Nixon- era's Commission on Obscenity and Pornography. Not that the police are side-tracked in their relentless pursuit of soft targets!

Very misleading information is posted about this movie. Well, currently (July 2017) if you Google the name, it sounds kinda cool. Thought-provoking movie about the old days of porno- making? No, man, this little flick is too weak and too boring to inspire any thoughts. Well-made? Hell, had it been well- made I'd have rated it a lot more. Do not expect anything sleazy either. The movie stands on the edge and tests the waters, afraid to go in. Believe me, this flick is a clunker.

But it has two things going for it. The beauty of its two female leads. Barbara Caron (later Mills) as Lisa, and Inga as Ingrid. One problem, they have the same style and appears very much alike. Only, Lisa is the mother, and Jim is looking to broaden his horizon. Ingrid, Lisa, they both have long luscious brown manes, and me being The Raven, d-uh, I go ga-ga for them. The Seventies was a harsh era. Permed. Rough and sun-tanned. I grew up during that era, but looking back, in old magazines, so many models (and their stylists) had it all wrong. The soft look of the Nineties is my thing. But these girls, they were icons ahead of their time. They do have that "free" look, but unspoiled. They'd look NOW if they could step out of the film.

Which brings me to a sad revelation. I Googled Barbara Caron, and she's already long-gone deceased in 2010. Remembered for her long brown mane on Wikipedia, and her gentle description still haunts me. I haven't even gotten around to Googling Inga after that...

Getting back to the movie, behind the scenes at a blue movie studio. Weakly filmed, with enough self-censorship to choke ten horses. Unless you're into seeing two pretty faces framed by glorious long hair cascading down their backs, and, yes, Barbara has long, long legs which are often put on display as she comes down the stairs barefoot... well, you get the picture, there are a few bits of nudity, but if that is what you're after, very little to see. Controversial naked mother with daughter on the stairs, well, there is that.

I myself believe in freedom of expression, spoilsports need to be told off, so I very much like the rebellious spirit noticeable towards the end, yeah, you go, Jim dude! but actor Alain couldn't even nearly carry it off. And the ending's inconclusive.

The story is weak and the lead actor is some foreign dude, French obviously, who is the multi-talent Jack Of All Trades but yeah, a Master Of None. The further it goes on, the more you see his shortcomings. In a pivotal scene, Barbara, in close-up, is supposed to portray anguish at impending police crackdown, but seems to giggle. Inga is also a foreign chick, and exactly just what is said, often eludes me.

Of course, I wouldn't have wanted Barbara and Inga any different. As for the rest though...

This snooze-fest makes Tommy Wiseau look Oscar-worthy. In fact, there are many similarities with The Room - an actor/director with an accent, topless women, and a guy who argues with his wife. But at least Tommy is kind of funny and constructs interesting scenes. The guy shoots porn films to get money to build a boat. His wife doesn't like it. Occasionally cops act like they might do something. That's about all that happens. Somehow, they stretched that premise to over an hour. The porn angle is not interesting either. I almost fell asleep, but the only thing keeping me awake is wondering if they made it this dull on purpose. I can only recommend watching this if you want to brag to your friends about having sat all the way through it.