Getting Into Heaven

"Getting Into Heaven" has been reviewed more than it deserves. I'll leave it to others to explain the plot which is fairly mundane. There are too many lingering, boring shots which drag the movie out. As such, the film is a tedious affair by modern-day standards, but has it's charms. Mainly the magnificent Uschi Digard, whose beauty has been rarely matched in any age. The print I viewed was extremely well preserved with few artifacts. And last and most thankfully, Uschi displays her gorgeousness in abundance, which redeems this from the abominable category.

When I was approached by Ed Montoro to read for this movie, I thought he was joking. I had made two other films for other directors and he asked me to come read for Bernie the Cop in "Getting Into Heaven". We shot the movie on location in Sequoia National Park, San Diego, and Beverly Hills, CA. It was shot in 9 days and I had a ball with all three girls. Using the name Scott Cameron kept me out of trouble with the people at work. Sure the film has some silly dialogue, but with Uschi Digart as the female star, who would complain. I had three major nude scenes with her and believe me, she is all woman. Don't pass up a chance to see this film. Something Weird video has chosen to release the 88 minute European version of the film.

I'm a real Uschi fan so I enjoyed the movie but was thankful for the fast forward button. Uschi is in FINE form as well as her female co-star but the plot was missing. Well I didn't get the film for the story anyway so no complaints, but no recommendations either.

Getting Into Heaven (1970)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

Mildly entertaining romp gets the added bonus of having Uschi Digard playing the lead instead of being in the background of a supporting player. In the film she plays Heaven, a young woman who heads to Hollywood to become a star. Once there she moves in with her friend Sin (Jennie Lynn) and soon the two have an audition with a producer named Salacity (Miles White). That's pretty much the only "plot" here as we get several sex scenes, lot of nudity and if you're a fan of Digard you're going to have a lot of fun with this one. As I read more and more about Digard it appears she didn't have too many chances of playing the lead part so fans point to this film as your best chance of seeing her. She's surprisingly very good here as she really comes across as a sweet person and someone you'd like to hang out with (even without her amazing looks). She's got an incredible body, which will be the main reason people are going to check this film out. This time out she goes completely nude in the majority of her scenes as she has a couple (simulated) sex scenes with men and one with a woman. None of them are overly erotic or sexy but she's certainly great eye candy. The supporting players features a sometimes scary Lynn and a rather amusing White. Scott Cameron plays Bernie, a cop who loses his virginity to Digard after he pulls her over. The film takes advantage of Digard being from out of the country as we get some funny jokes aimed at that including the scene where she gets pulled over. Other moments of comedy happen throughout and for the most part they work, even if they are a tad bit silly. This film will certainly never be mistaken for CITIZEN KANE but if you're just wanting to mindless sex and nudity then this here isn't too bad. Digard is certainly the main reason to check this one out as she certainly looks the part of Heaven.

If you enjoy sex 'comedies' such as Ed Wood's wretched Love Feast, here's another unfunny film about naked women simulating sex with men in boxer shorts. It could have been tolerable, but stars Uschi Digard and Jennie Lynn are simply not attractive--and Lynn wears the most eye shadow this side of Divine. Unattractive women pretending to have sex with unattractive men (one of whom bears a startling resemblance to Rick Moranis)=bad film with bad acting and bad dialogue. Perhaps I was expecting too much, but Getting Into Heaven makes its DVD partner, Angels, look like Citizen Kane in comparison. As bad as that film is, at least it has a story. You'll enjoy the extras on the DVD more than you will the features.