The Jupiter Menace

My review was written in June 1984 after watching the film on Thorn EMI video cassette.

Made in 1981, "The Jupiter Menace" is a gee-whiz, scare documentary elaborating on the basic premise that our world will come to an end in December 1982 when the planetary alignment fulfills various prophecy by psychics, prophets and scientists foretelling doom. Since things still are running smoothly, theatrically unreleased docu is vaguely reassuring to watch on video cassette, though it promises another truly devastating cataclysm by the year 2000.

Boasting top-notch special effects, model work and computer animation by experts such as an underground filmmaker Scott Bartlett (who previously contributed to "American Graffiti" and "Altered States"), "Menace basically resembles the numerous goofball docus cranked out a decade ago by Sunn Classics and others to intrigue credulous audiences lured by hardsell ads and booked on a four-wall basis. Actor George Kennedy walks the viewer through an assortment of theories that forecast cataclysmic upheavals on Earth in the near future. Filmmakers chea by interchangeably mixing real scientists and psychics with actors pretending to be "real' in their equally unconvincing explanations of why (and how) the Earth's poles are suddenly going to shift, plunging us into an instant ice age, or some such other quack notion.

An interesting segment midway spotlights on various groups of "survivalists", those friendly folks (spoofed i the 1983 Robin Williams flo film "The Survivors" who seem to have memorized Ray Milland's 1962 film "Panic in Year Zero" and are busily arming themselves in the belief that protection against one's fellow man is the best way to handle an impending natural disaster. The Stelle Community near Chicago, repped on screen by technical expert Tim Wilhelm, are the type of people who would heartily endorse Dr. Strangelove's plans enumerated in the 1963 Stanley Kubrick film of that name, rather than recognize them as satire or a cautionary message. Lest one conclude that they are on the right track, please note these folks are planning to build 2-3,000 airships (for completion by the year 1999) in which to hover above the Earth until it is safe to land again, at which future time they will form a new post-Apocalyptic community called "Philadelphia".

A bit more frightening are the people of Zarephath Hoeb community in the Ozarks, who believe they're on a mission from God and stress war games and violent self-defense training. They mirror the existence of thousands of "normal' people who attend weekly military exercises, probably having overdosed on too many World War III movies which inevitably feature that cliched scene of looters and nasty neighbors who will invade your hard-earned bomb shelter if you aren't ready to shoot them down.

Since the film's exec producers, Peter Davis and William Panzer, made the film "St. Helens" in 1980, there is footage of the volcano erupting and mucho boring predictions of super-earthquakes worldwide. A computer simulation of a 12-point (Richter scale) earthquake is thoroughly unconvincing, as is a cheapo look at a video display purportedly showing us a flat topped sunken pyramid 40 miles off the Florida coast.

For those who desperately want to believe in his nonsense, the next super conjunction of planets is due to occur May 5, 2000. If you thought the world ended in 1982, wait till you see what happens to it 16 years from now.

Although the content of the movie itself is a bit on the lame side (though quite amusing), the soundtrack is a real treat for those who have an ear for early electronic music. It is performed by Synergy (Larry Fast), who produced several cutting-edge electronic music albums starting in the mid-70's. You can still find CD's of this soundtrack and Synergy's other works if you search the internet. I recently picked up an autographed copy of this soundtrack CD for the same price as what you'd pay for a regular disc at the local record store. Google "the artist shop" if you're interested (this is not an advertisement, but I personally have been very satisfied with all of my purchases there).

Well i must say, my friends all told me about this movie and i was apprehensive, to say the least. I have never been one for conspiricy theory films, so i thought this would be no exception. I was wrong. ten minutes into it and i was hooked. George Kennedy's narration was superb, and the story really got me thinking about our planet and if others may exist. I reccomend this film to anyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A kook filled look at crazies saying the world is going to suffer massive earthquakes starting in 1982 and culminating with a planetary alignment on May 5, 2000 that will destroy all civilization. What more could you want? This is so awesome to watch after all these earnest nut jobs have been proven wrong. A great soundtrack and a great party movie!

One hopes that George Kennedy was either well paid or was unaware of the full intent of those behind "The Jupiter Menace." In his defense, Kennedy appears only a few times throughout this "documentary" and doesn't embarrass himself to any great extent. Among the crop of Bigfoot, Bermuda Triangle, and UFO "documentaries" made in the 1970s and into the '80s, "Jupiter Menace" is a real gem. The film reveals its dire message that an alignment of planets in the, then near future, 1982 will start a period of turmoil on Earth that will reach its peak in 2000 causing a basic end of the world as we know it. The film is a prime example of this silly scare genre and includes goofy re-enactments and interviews with "experts" that are taking facts from Bible prophecy and/or psychic visions. Certainly more amusing today, now that we've passed all the dates foretold in the movies as being doomsday, this movie will entertain those curious. Particularly fun is the near-guarantee given by nearly everyone interviewed in the film that May 5th, 2000 is the certain end of the happy existence we've enjoyed on planet Earth. Also fun and equally frightening are the interviews with survivalists in the Ozarks and Illinois that are preparing to survive the deadly days ahead of us all in the 1980s. One must wonder, where are those folks now??? Sadly, they're likely still packed away in a bunker somewhere! :)