Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things

Very strange, and quite funny little movie about a gay couple hiding out, one of them wanted for murder, which the other one is responsible for. One is a coke snorting hippie, the other one a Psycho killer in drag, mayhem and b.movie weirdness follows. Give it a chance if you like obscure 70´ movies.

The working title was: "Don't Spank Baby".

Wayne Crawford went on to become a successful producer, films like Valley Girl, Night of the Comet and others, even though he wasn't too terrific in this little Gem. And little known Abe Zwick should have gotten tons of work from this film but didn't. Filmed at Moberly Studios in Hollywood Florida, on the same lot the early Tarzan movies were filmed. This film is definitely for those who appreciate the abstract. The movie was originally shot with much more bloody graphic slasher scenes. For reasons only known to Tom Casey the Director, the bloody slasher scenes were given a tab of LSD, and replaced by Flash Editing. Even though this version is worthy of a look for those so inclined, in my opinion the original version would have packed the punch needed to make this a full on Slasher 70's Cult Classic.

Don't be deceived by the misleading title, because the truth is that Aunt Martha CONSTANTLY does dreadful things. In fact, "Aunt Martha" is one badass brick of a Bea Arthur lookin' transvestite who's on the lam after robbing a bank, and living incognito with Stanley, "her" virile, but dope-addled lover/accomplice. And while she may seem like a charm-schooled and self composed hostess, Aunt Martha's infernal hostilities are easily roused by the winsome young girls who follow Stanley home from time to time. Quick to exterminate these potential threats in a variety of gruesome ways, Aunt Martha proves herself a most formidable adversary when it comes to competing for Stanley's affections.

Delightfully off-hand weirdness, AUNT MARTHA is archetypal of the anything-goes craziness of low-budget 70s cinema...a film so abstractly imagined and impulsively realized, it alights with a desultory otherness so reverently sincere that it steals a place in your heart usually reserved for awkwardly cross-bred puppies. Forgivable of its general inelegance, this is a fine specimen of a most exiguous film species.

7/10.

Going by the date, poster and title, I had assumed that Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things would be a dark comedy/horror in the same vein as What's the Matter with Helen? (1971) and Whoever Slew Auntie Roo? (1972). I couldn't have been more wrong: what we actually have here is an independent '70s exploitation oddity that is hard to pigeon-hole because of its sheer lunacy. All I can say is that it is a one of a kind movie - and that's probably a good thing, 'cos I wouldn't want to stumble upon another like it.

Abe Zwick and Wayne Crawford star as escaped criminals Paul and Stanley, who have gone into hiding in Miami, Paul dressing in drag to pose as 'Aunt Martha' while youngster Stanley pretends to be Martha's nephew. As Paul looks after the house (he really does enjoy being Martha!), Stanley gets high on dope and attracts the attention of all the pretty girls in the neighbourhood, who want to get into his flared snakeskin pants. Stanley freaks out whenever the girls go for his groin, and pushes them away, but this still doesn't stop Paul from becoming jealous (it is implied that he and Stanley are lovers) and, in a frenzy of bad editing, getting all stabby with his kitchen knife.

When Stanley invites junkie Hubert (Don Craig) to stay for a while, Paul becomes even more twitchy, untrusting of his new house guest; and rightly so, for Hubert is on the hunt for the stash of stolen jewellery that Paul has hidden in the fireplace.

The sole directorial credit for Thomas Casey - and it's not hard to see why - Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things is a cheap, poorly directed, shoddily compiled and badly acted piece of hippie trash that can only be of interest to those who actively seek out obscure cinematic garbage of the most inept kind, or those who took part in its creation.

2/10 for the gratuitous nudity from several groovy young ladies, and that's being generous.

The most dreadful thing Aunt Martha does is bring you this film.

There is only one redeeming object in the entire show. Nestled within the story is a modest seed of a story concept - one I may use for a story I have in mind. Crooks on the run from the law take to lying low in a Motel. While there, one of them dresses as a woman, Aunt Martha, so he can move about freely to assess the situation and keep tabs on the cops.

The concept offers lots of possibilities. Using a few of the options would enhance both story and film a hundredfold. Unfortunately, what writer and director Thomas Casey gives us is pure tedium. The story is lazily written and underdeveloped. It's a hodgepodge of a tale about a psychopath and his partner in crime and... sex. The progression and motives for the murders are clear, although most are unrealistic. And Casey presents them to us in a mundane matter-of-fact manner.

The lack of substance doesn't end with Paul or Martha's characterisations. It bleeds through to the story. There's not enough in this film to keep your attention on the screen. I found myself constantly looking away, and I even turned on the dreaded laptop - the killer of all focus.

Casey is worse at directing than writing; there was little hope for this flick. He takes a point-and-shoot stance to the filming and has little to no consideration for the pace of the film. The end product is little more than a straight-forward and often uninteresting rendition of an awful story.

At least the actor who played Paul's partner, Stanley, appears to have had a joyous time. Wayne Crawford isn't a marvellous actor, but he instils Stanley with an impish temperament. It lifts the direness of the movie, but not enough.

I would suggest steering well clear of this turkey - even at Thanksgiving. Though if a copy creeps up on you, then do the world a favour and bury it in a deep hole under the patio in your garden. Or slip it quietly through a horrid neighbours letterbox.

Ratings: Story 0.75 : Direction 0.5 : Pace 0.5 : Acting 1 : Enjoyment 0.5 Total 3.25 out of 10.

Now click on through to my Chiller Thriller Killers list to see where the turkey and Aunt Martha charted... but better yet, to find something better for your viewing pleasure.

Take Care and Stay Well.