Relax... It's Just Sex

This could have been a shallow by-the-numbers movie about gay, lesbian and straight friends in LA, but it wasn't. The characters and situations are realistic, all the acting was good and the movie doesn't shy away from showing male-male sex scenes (which is why it's unrated). The movie isn't perfect. It isn't as funny as it could be and some scenes don't play out at all or play out too long. Still, when was the last time we had a movie that dealt honestly and explicitly with gay men without desexing them or turning it into innocuous comedy (like "Jeffrey"). A really good film.

The first half of the film is plagued by strange use of music and poor sound quality, but somewhere along the line, as if by magic, the film takes root. The technical weakness improves a great deal, and the characters come to life. By the end of the movie, you want more.

This is a realistic view of problems faced by many people: anti-gay violence, relationships that go awry, disease, and miscarriage. The relationships between the friends in this film are very strong and moving, and in the last half of the movie we see some very powerful and wonderful results of the friendships. Perhaps loveliest of all is a scene between two women, former lovers, who are talking as the NEW lover overhears everything. I won't say what happens, but it is a wonderful and gorgeous scene unlike anything I have seen in any other movie. This scene alone makes the film worth seeing.

See it by all means, but be prepared for some frustration with the first half of the film.

Shook me up and I'm not very clear as to why. Having only been 'out' for a few months, some of what I felt I'm sure was due to inexperience. To me, the story of a playwright who lives and breathes in 'Dating Hell' is something everyone gay or straight can relate to. His anger at the 'gay bashers' and his general confusion really had an effect on me. Kind of like taking 'Okay so now you're a Homo 101' and being faced with a lot of issues from across the board.

I truly believed the storyline and the actors were so real to me. The HIV issue with Javi was well done and Buzz made his points regarding alternative opinion convincingly. The lesbian turned straight, Robin and Serina and their triangle against the backdrop of the 'rape' (I won't say more) while the main arc of the story is the straight woman who wants a baby so bad -- all of this demanded me to examine and comment on 'our human condition'.

The film jams alot of perspective into 96 minutes.

See it! I enjoyed it. I cried. And laughed alot but never has a movie made me feel more alone than this one.

This is a fairly decent film with a really lame title. The film's opening is even misleading, starting with some pretty raucous gay sex--so from the outset it appears as if the film is going to be yet another dull explorating of the trials of gay life in the 90s. And there have been a lot of those films lately. Fortunately, director PJ Castellaneta is more wily than he lets on, and allows the film to evolve into something more intricate and at times very touching.

The film manages to balance a cast of widely different characters and maintain a sense of order without devolving into a who's who of politically correct character inclusion. You have the straights, the gays, the lesbians, the bisexuals, blacks, whites, latinos, and the film even manages to present Christianity in positive tones, albeit with a few well placed jabs now and then. The scripts evenly doles out its emotional weight, never straying into farce when it would be the easy thing to do, nor does it list grind into maudlin sentimentality when it would also be the easy thing to do.

The story revolves around the lives of a coterie of friends of various sexual orientations and temperament. "Relax" follows their development with humor and insight, sometimes relying too much on an intrusive voiceover by the main character, Vince. The emotional centerpiece of the film is a gay bashing where the victim suddenly gains the upper hand. This moment threatens to overwhelm the final half of the film because it raises a crucial question that the "Relax" never adequately, answers (nor did I feel it should have answered), which is, In a world where one is oppressed by violence, to what degree is violence--retributive, eye-for-an-eye violence--an appropriate response?

This is just one of a number of issues that the film raises and leaves for your consideration. Perhaps it is just as well, since it seems like to dwell overly long on these issues would overwhelm the rest of the film; indeed, Castellaneta felt it necessary to remove Vince from the main thread of the film, whereas he was hitherto the central character. In his place, Jennifer Tilly takes over, and she takes the film to its conclusion. Tilly usually goes for the quirks or the sex appeal of her film characters, but this time around she plays a woman whose quirks don't overwhelm her personality, merely compliment. She makes the film.

It was also nice to see a gay film that didn't trot out the familiar, banal diatribes against Christianity. Granted, the gay Christian couple does come across as a little hokey at times, they are never portrayed as weird, evil, judgmental, or exclusionary. Indeed, they are a fitting completion to the the microcosmos that revolves around Tilly's maternal presence.

I came to the film with few expectations and came away rather pleased. There are still a few drawn out moments that could have been trimmed, but the overall package of this film was a surprising delight.

I saw this movie several times in the theater (I have many friends who won't go to the movies unless I drag them) and each time I left the theater exhilarated. It takes the movie a little while to take it's footing but once it got ahold, it was great. The acting is, at first, self conscious but gets better as time goes by. I think the first dinner party scene is where it all comes together. I really appreciated the honest, moving portrayals by Jennifer Tilly and Lori Petty, they both added so much life to the movie. I especially like the scene where Lori Petty overhears the conversation, that got me every time! I cried each time I saw it and so did the rest of the audience. My favorite thing was coming out of it the first time and there were 2 burly leather guys standing at the door, wiping away each others tears. Definitely recommended.