They Bite

Ambitious far beyond expectations, "They Bite" succeeds in spoofing not one, but two movie genres. The first half has at least a bunch of chuckles, squarely aimed at the adult film industry. The actors are likable, the acting is acceptable for this type production, and the nudity is not totally gratuitous. The second half is all about the fish monsters, with the sci-fi elements, and special effects surprisingly effective considering the minuscule budget. Just when you thought things couldn't get more outrageous, they do. The closest porno parody flick I could compare this to would be "The First Nudie Musical", which is a spoof of Broadway shows, and contains lots of nudity. In fact they both have the identical line spoken by their leading nude lady, "I am an actress" - MERK

After the first five minutes you're probably thinking this is nothing but cheap smut and violent filth.You're basically right. but if you can handle this kind of movie then you should probably see it(although it is hard to find).Also anyone who is a fan of the old beach monster movies shown at drive ins in the 50's-60's will probably like this seeing as how it pays homage to movies of that sub genre like 'The Horror of Party Beach'.This is not a movie to take seriously, you should just have fun with it.

This movie is obviously somewhat derivative of the 80's Roger Corman classic "Humanoids from the Deep". But then that movie back in its day was excoriated for being a derivative, sexed-up version of "Creature from the Black Lagoon". I kind of liked this just because it was a fun movie with a genuinely independent feel to it, not just another cynical effort to make an intentional "cult" movie (the 90's were lousy with such efforts by hacks like Jim Wynorski and David DeCouteau). The movie also anticipates the kind of 90's reflexive filmmaking represented by "Scream" in that the characters in the movie have themselves watched horror movies. A porn filmmaking crew in the movie become aware of an invasion of humanoid fish monsters (after their mail gets mixed up with that of a female marine biologist) and decide to take advantage of it by making an XXX movie-within-the-movie called "Invasion of the Fish F**kers". This movie kinda reminds of another pre-"Scream" 90's independent film called "There's Nothing Out There", and like that one it remains relegated to out-of-print VHS while any number of much lesser 90's Wynorski/DeCouteau-type crap flicks are available on DVD and Blu-Ray today.

Brett Piper is an interesting filmmaker. He's decidedly "b-movie" with a long string of credits like "Draniac" or "The Screaming Dead", but he seems to have a genuine love of "b-movie" filmmaking rather than a cynical attitude of "let's make a cheap-ass 'cult' film with as little money as possible while laughing all the way to the bank." Obviously, there is a lot of nudity here by 90's softcore actresses, Cristina Veronica and Blake Pickett, and Playboy Playmate Susie Owens (who has an infamous vagina dentata scene, which was completely edited out of the "R-rated" version, but was actually completely irrelevant to the plot anyway, and was only grafted on at the behest of the producers). But this is the rare 90's exploitation movie that might actually be entertaining even WITHOUT the gratuitous female nudity. Interestingly, most recognizable "star" here is no doubt XXX actor Ron Jeremy (before he was regularly being cast in low-budget mainstream films). Thank god he keeps HIS clothes on though--I'd rather watch the girls being assaulted by scaly fish monsters!

Back in 1980 a remarkably entertaining b-movie was released called Humanoids From the Deep, it was a really enjoyable tale about fishmen preying on the towns people. In 1996 it was remade and was really quite poor, well the same year they made this which is essentially a parody of them and it's no better than the remake.

You see it tells essentially the same story but with tweaks, but more comedy. Trouble is there isn't enough comedy to get past the movies overwhelming volume of flaws.

Starring porn industry legend Ron Jeremy (Looking oddly trim) we see less of the creatures than we'd perhaps like to due to I can only assume their restricted budget. To make up for this we'd have needed a lot of laughs and a great script but alas we lack both.

Sure I laughed a couple of times, but literally a couple of times across the movies 90 minutes running time! It's just not funny enough, the horror element is entirely absent and quite frankly a lot of it is just plain ugly.

Jeremy is great, our leading lady who has this movie and this movie alone on her resume was great also but beyond them the movie brings nothing to the table except lashings of boobs!

The Good:

A few good cast members

A couple of laughs

The Bad:

Low budget shows

Not enough comedy to justify the runtime

Hardly a "Parody"

I found this one in the loser bin for $1.00 on VHS. It looked bad but I figured, what the hell, my collection is full of bad, one time viewing, crap. All I can say is, this movie has it all! Yes, the production starts off pretty low quality but is pretty impressive by the end, what really surprised me about this one was the plot. It was well written and actually has some depth and twists to it. Also, the characters are very likable and even somewhat believable. Every time the film comes back to the film crew their dialog had me laughing my ass off, and not because it was bad. This is rare in the genre. They reminded me of the group of friends in "40 year old virgin". This movie really delivers in the breast department. Very few movies have so many boobs. I'm not sure what else to say. I've watched it about 8 times now and it keeps getting better. All my friends agree. Its a perfect movie to sit around and drink beer to. "They Bite" is the kind of film "Slither" was aspiring to be. Watch it if you can find it. Pure classic horror from an era that is long gone.