Trucks: Comboio do Terror

This movie truly sucks! Nothing happened! It was the longest 100 minute movie I've ever seen. But the extremely high level of suck is not completely consistent. There are two hilarious scenes (one involving a remote control truck the other an axe). If you have the misfortune of having rented this piece of crap search through and watch these two scenes for a few laughs.

No really, you have to see this movie. If for no other reason than all the awful reviews. I actually enjoyed this movie. It was entertaining. I liked the characters. They made sense... well I guess if you consider the trucks as characters that kinda makes my statement invalid. I swear, the Sci-fi channell looks for the worst movies ever. I am, however, standing by my review: not worse than "Night Shift". I'd even say it was better than that because the characters were entertaining. There was nothing good about "Night Shift". It was horrible. You should really see that one too. Awful. Nothing redeemable in "Night Shift".

This movie is based on a Stephen King short story which surprisingly isn't about a writer in Maine who is stuck for ideas, which is his usual hero. Instead there's some people in a truck stop who get menaced by trucks that come alive. Already you've got a plot that wouldn't look out of place in a Garth Marengi novel.

In the short story there is little explanation as to why the trucks have turned hostile and that kind of works, well it works better than any explanation a rational person could come up with because it's patently a bit silly. Better to just leave it as a mystery hey? So what does the movie do? Delves right in there looking for answers.

Various explanations come up, each more risible than the last. One fat guy thinks the trucks have come alive because of pollution or something, someone else thinks its to do with aliens. What I love best about the explanations is the way the actors look totally shamefaced as they say their lines. They know this is the lowest point in their probably now dead careers.

You've already got one shiny nugget of comedy gold right there even before you factor in the bad acting but wipe it against your sleeve and you'll see it really shines with much more.

A guy gets attacked with the most rubber looking axe in the history of film making. Honestly, I swear I had to watch that bit five times. Another guy gets attacked by a toy truck he could easily drop kick across the street and has to pretend to be knocked over so it can ram him in the head a few times.

This is priceless straight-faced comedy the like of which you rarely see these days. It's so poor it really deserves a 1 but I can't bring myself to give it less than 2 because it made me laugh so much.

If you love bad movies this one needs to be on your shelf. I would love to have seen Stephen Kings face when he first saw this aired.

Stephen King's sole directorial effort MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE (1986) apparently wasn't silly enough (or didn't bomb hard enough) to kill the will of producers to remake his short story "Trucks" just over a decade later. In this incarnation, folks are held captive by the title beasts in a rustic truck stop run by Ray (Timothy Busfield). This was made-for- TV with a low budget and is decidedly less goofy so one has to wonder, "Why bother?" I mean, outside of the obvious, "We'll put Kings name on it and make a ton of money." The cast of mostly Canadians is fine and the illogical scenes are abound (if machines are turning on you, why is your plan to ride a motorcycle to steal a helicopter from the Army base? ). The funniest bit is a truck using its mirrors to spy on someone and then trying to play it off when someone catches it. And since when do cars with unexplained sentient powers need to see from the driver's viewpoint? There are a few gory and unrelated kill scenes that look like they were added in post-production, seemingly confirmed by an "additional scenes" end credit. Interestingly, they were produced by William (SCARECROWS) Wesley.

You heard me. It's so bad. The way the cars honk at each other to communicate will make you laugh. If you want to see a movie where a spirit possesses an unmoving object and kills people, see Child's Play. Don't waste your gas seeing this movie (pun intended).