Santo Matrimônio

If ever a film is a lost cause, this one is. I agree, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is the best part about it, although Patricia Arquette has her moments. The script and direction are both awful. Skip it unless you are fans of one of the stars.

Betsy (Patricia Arquette) and Peter (Tate Donovan) rob a carnival and go on the run. To hide out they return to the religious commune where Peter grew up. He hides the money and then promptly dies. To remain in the commune and find the money Betsy marries Peter's younger brother Ezekiel (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), leading to "comedy", "adventure" and "love".....

What could be better than a comedy set in an Amish-style community starring Patricia Arquette and directed by Spock? Well - quite a lot actually. The plot is pretty thin and all the "comedy" revolves around the mis-match of the boy and his adult wife. This gets very thin very quickly, leaving only the "thriller" plot of the dirty FBI agent hunting the money himself (John Schuck). Unfortunately the thriller element doesn't work either.

Patricia Arquette is poor in the lead role playing a very unsympathetic character that flicks between two emotions - angry and repentant. Gordon-Levitt is good as Ezekiel and has some of the few funny moments in the film. However he is hampered by the poor material he has to work with. Support from Donovan and Schuck is as poor as you'd expect.

It's not a terrible film but it's just all so lame. There's nothing to really make you feel strongly either way and to me that's worse than a film that's laughably bad. The whole project is pointless.

"Holy Matrimony" is a very cute, heartwarming movie. It one of those films that make you feel really good when you've watched it. At least it made me feel that way. It has a good script and an equally good cast. And Patricia Arquette is looking good !! Hey what more do you need ?!?! Go rent and watch it !!

...but all in all it wasn't so very painful.

It's hard to find an accurate descriptor for this movie. It was an effort...you sort of find yourself feeling the same way about it that you would about a child's school report read aloud...gently ignoring glaring flaws and nodding encouragingly.

Bonus points for including Hutterites in a movie. I bet a lot of people had no idea they even existed. Take away a few points for the gott-awful pseudogerman accents that everyone affected...they didn't work at all. Tate Donovan couldn't even keep the accent consistently...I thought at first he was acting "American" and then going back to German when he returned to the community...but then I heard American there too.

The plot had charm, but it was overall weak. Joseph Gordon-Levitt was very cute as Zeke, save a couple of stilted moments (in the car at the border). Patricia Arquette is generally a charming actress, but I found myself wincing a couple of times....("Jack...Daniels! Wooooooo!") The only character who seemed halfway authentic was Uncle Wilhelm, everyone else seemed uncomfortable and out-of-place.

The cover of the jacket bills it as a sexy comedy....I don't know where that came from....what sex?

Anyhow, it was sweet...not the best-directed or the best-acted, but it felt like the intention was there.

Do you really think I would be here if I didn't enjoy the movie. Albeit, minimally. The only true charm this movie has is the chrisma of the young Gordon-Levitt. Without him, the movie is a lost cause.