Kamillions

This movie reeks. No money, no acting, no nothing. I caught this on on the 3am late show movie tonight and felt compelled to comment on it. This movie has nothing to recommend it. I can't believe it ever got released to US television! Nobody in this movie can act their way out of a paperbag. The lame attempts at comedy fall flat on their face, the special effects consist of a worm-like handpuppet "monster"... I can't even begin to tell you how rock-bottom this production is. It looks like it cost maybe $50,000 to shoot, but only because it is on 16mm, and that is probably a generous estimate! Anyway, I lost interest rapidly and had to settle for watching "Matlock" reruns instead of finishing it. That's how BAD this movie is!!!

On the night of his birthday party, scientist Nathan Wingate discovers another dimension through a contraption he's built in his basement. Unfortunately, just as the guests begin to arrive, the good doctor gets sucked into the other world and two shape-shifting bugs with magical powers enter ours. One is good-natured, the other's a sadistic prankster, and the Wingate family and their eccentric guests are unknowingly caught in the middle.

Every once in a while, I'll see some old movie and say, "WHY have I never heard of this before?!" That was certainly the case here. Don't get me wrong, on the surface it looks like "MST3K" material - the acting is generally bad, the FX are super-low-budget, the pacing is off, and some of the gags fall flat. But man, the characters have enough individuality that you wanna root for them, the FX are impressively inventive, and a lot of the stuff is genuinely funny (it was co-written and directed by a now-longtime alum of "The Simpsons"). It's intentionally campy but teeters on a tightrope where it's simultaneously creepy and it boasts a clever twist too (assuming you haven't read the film's tagline!?!).

If Scream Factory or some other distributor would unearth and complete the director's cut of this endearing obscurity, there's a huge audience out there which is waiting to discover it. Until then, it's worth seeking out online if you're into '80s movies with extra corn!

The critics hate it... but only the ones with no sense of humor. This film will probably be to our generation what Plan Nine From Outer Space was to our parents. It's so bad it's good, deliciously good! The mad doctor is frumpy and completely self absorbed. The monster is-- well-- beyond words! The first time you see it, you think "what the f--" But by the second time, it gets to be like the Rocky Horror Picture Show. You want to shout out replies and retorts to the actors! If you're a fan of the weird and wonderful, this is a must-see film! I had the same feeling after seeing "Eraserhead". I hated it. But I felt I had to see it again, despite my better judgment. Now I look forward to any opportunity to see either film again and again. These dark comedies are an acquired taste, but well worth it.

Kamillions is that rare film that truly offers something for the film fan of every ilk. We have scares that will make you jump right out of your seat, side-splitting laughs, unflinching eroticism, and awe inspiring FX work! The plot of this film is rather similar to that of the horror blockbuster the Mist, or possibly the Thing. A scientist is experimenting with interdimensional...something. As a result, the doctor is sucked into his interdimensional...thing, and the Kamillions are unleashed on a group of unsuspecting houseguests as well as the scientist's own family! The events that transpire from this point on are almost too incredible to be believed! The box art said that the film reminded one reviewer of Cronenberg's the Fly, but I personally think that this is the superior film by far. Say what you want about Cronenberg's masterpiece of body-horror, I don't recall a religious fanatic being killed by his own penis in THAT picture! I've never heard of any of the people involved with the production of this masterpiece, but it is a damn shame that none of them rose to the heights of stardom that this film should have elevated them to. I am giving this film 10 out of a possible 10 stars because it is as close to cinematic perfection as you are likely to see. Catch Kamillions, before they catch you!

Kamillions is a great film for practicing your skills at studying a film for general narrative flaws. It's a welter of poor scenario and character development work, tepid writing, and fine-to-merely-OK acting held together in a pudding of pretty good technical production work (e.g., good editing, OK music/sound).

It's a disconnected series of comic/spooky/horror scenarios loosely derived from an opening, "kick-off" premise involving a portal to another world, with invaders coming from that world.

I've seen a few films that fill out the same contours, failing on the same grounds, and with even better production values (e.g., "John Dies at the End"), so there appears to be a strange market that directs funding to produce this kind of low-budget drek. Its one saving grace is that it gives budding film folks an opportunity to exercise and refine their chops.

By-the-by, I dug seeing Hal Robins, and love hearing his voice.