Citações

A Morte lhe Cai Bem

Editar

Madeline Ashton: Bottoms up!
[Madeline drinks the potion]
Lisle Von Rhoman: Now, a warning.
Madeline Ashton: NOW a warning?

Ernest Menville: Where did you put my wife?
Second Doctor: She's dead, sir. They took her to the morgue.
Ernest Menville: The morgue? She'll be FURIOUS!

Madeline Ashton: Wrinkled, wrinkled little star... hope they never see the scars.

Lisle Von Rhuman: This is life's ultimate cruelty. It offers us a taste of youth and vitality, and then it makes us witness our own decay.

Madeleine: Could you just not breathe?

[Helen has a gaping hole in her abdomen]
Madeline Ashton: You're a fraud, Helen! You're a walking lie and I can see right... THROUGH YOU!
[watch through the hole while laughing]

Ernest Menville: 'Til death do us part! Well, you girls are dead. And I'm parting.

Madeline Ashton: Ernest... my ass! I can see MY ASS!

Madeline Ashton: Oh, for Christ's sake, at least lie quickly!
Dakota: I'm trying to!

Helen: She was a homebreaker. She was a man-eater. And she was a *bad* actress.

[Helen and Madeleine shatter into pieces after falling down stairs]
Helen: Do you remember where you parked the car?

[Helen has a gaping hole in her abdomen after being shot into a pool]
Helen: Look at me, Ernest! Just look at me! I'm soaking wet!
Ernest Menville: And there seems to be something wrong with your, uh... blouse.

Emergency Room Doctor: I tell you what, kids, it's, uh, odd thing here. Your wrist, uh, far as I can tell, is, uh, fractured in three places. Uh, and you've shattered, uh, two vertebrae, though I can't be certain without an X-ray... The bone protrusion through the skin - that's not a good sign. Your body temperature is below 80, and your, your, your heart's stopped beating.
Ernest Menville: What the hell does that mean?
Emergency Room Doctor: Exactly! What... what... I'm going to get a second opinion.
[the doctor leaves in a hurry]
Madeline Ashton: Well, it could be worse.

Lisle Von Rhuman: Go on... Drink it... It is the completion of your life's work. You gave other people youth and wasted your own! Drink. And you will be able to work again forever! Drink... drink, Dr. Menville. You owe yourself another chance! Drink! It's the right choice! The *only* choice! Drink! SEMPRE VIVE! LIVE FOREVER!
Ernest Menville: Then what?
Lisle Von Rhuman: What?
Ernest Menville: Then what happens?
Lisle Von Rhuman: What?
Ernest Menville: I don't want to live forever. I mean, it sounds good, but what am I gonna do? What if I get bored?
Lisle Von Rhuman: What?
Ernest Menville: And what if I get lonely? Who am I gonna hang around with, Madeleine and Helen?

[Helen pours alcohol all over Madeline's car and then dumps the bottles inside, revealing dozens of bottles and alcohol everywhere]
Helen: We'll make it look like she's had just a little bit too much to drink...

Helen: Oh, gosh, I'm glad you came. I didn't know if you would. I spoke to my PR woman and she said Madeleine Ashton goes to the opening of an envelope. Oh, those people can be so cruel!
Madeleine: Mmmm.
Helen: I fired her.
Madeleine: [pleased] Oh!
Helen: Well, I almost fired her.

Ernest Menville: She's dead!
Madeline Ashton: She is? Oh. These are the moments that make life worth living.

Helen: I will not speak to you 'til you put your head on straight.

[Lisle demonstrates the potion]
Madeline Ashton: Check ok?
Lisle Von Rhuman: Fine.

[upon discovering her neck has twisted a complete 180 degrees]
Madeline Ashton: Ernest... my ass! I can *see*... my ASS!
Ernest Menville: And there's something really wrong with your neck too.

Madeleine: I just want you to know one thing...
[Madeleine points gun at Helen]
Madeleine: You brought this on yourself.
Ernest: Madeleine!
[Madeleine shoots Helen and Ernest screams]

Madeleine: Look at you. You have a... waist.

Lisle: But you'll never grow old!
Ernest: Yes, but everybody else will! I'll have to watch everyone around me die. I don't think this is right. This is not a dream. This is a nightmare!

Ernest Menville: [at Helen's book party] Have you seen her yet?
Madeline: What a joke. She's not even here.
Ernest Menville: Wait. Look over there.
Madeline: [a heavy-set woman stands surrounded by people] Oh! Looks as though she's lost a few pou-
[the heavy set lady moves out of the way to reveal the incredibly thin Helen Sharp]

Helen Sharp: En garde, BITCH!

Helen: She married a brilliant surgeon, and turned him into an undertaker.

Lisle: Drink that potion, and you'll never grow even one day older. Don't drink it, and continue to watch yourself rot.

[last lines]
Madeline Ashton: Has that ever worked by the way? When you ask me where I last saw something?
Helen Sharp: Yes.
Madeline Ashton: When?
Helen Sharp: When you lost your index finger.
Madeline Ashton: I didn't lose it, it broke off.
Helen Sharp: That's because you cracked your knuckles all the tIIII...
[slipping on the can of spray paint they dropped]
Helen Sharp: Oh! Help me! My legs aren't working! Help me!
[Helen pulls a smug Madeline down with her and they break into pieces as they hit the bottom of the stairs]
Madeline Ashton: [as a head to Madeline's] Do you remember where you parked the car?

Anna: How about a nice collagen buff?
Madeline Ashton: "A collagen buff"? You might as well ask me to wash with soap and water!
Anna: I could do your make-up myself...
Madeline Ashton: Make-up is POINTLESS! It does nothing anymore! Are you even listening to me? Do you even care? You stand there with your 22-year- old skin and your tits like ROCKS and laugh at me...
[sobs]

Madeleine: You're dressed. Special occasion?

Lisle Von Rhuman: So warm, so full of life. This is life's ultimate cruelty. It offers us the taste of youth and vitality. And then, it makes us witness our own decay.
Madeleine: Well, it is the natural law.
Lisle Von Rhuman: Oh, screw the natural law!
[She opens a box to reveal a vial containing a potion]
Madeleine: What is that?
Lisle Von Rhuman: What you came for, a touch of magic in this world obsessed with science. A tonic, a potion.
Madeleine: What does it do?
Lisle Von Rhuman: How old would you guess I am?
Madeleine: I wouldn't.
[Continues looking at the potion vial]
Lisle Von Rhuman: Come on, don't try to flatter me.
Madeleine: 38.
[Lisle looks insulted]
Madeleine: Oh, 28. 3... 23.
Lisle Von Rhuman: I am 71 years old! That's what it does. It stops the aging process dead in its tracks and forces it into retreat. Drink that potion and you'll never grow even one day older. Don't drink it, then continue to watch yourself rot.
Madeleine: How much is it?
Lisle Von Rhuman: The sordid topic of coin, I'm afraid, is not so simple. The cost, you see, it's different for everyone.
Madeleine: Well, for me, how much?
[She does the arithmetic on a notepad, while Madeline tries to peek; she holds up the paper, showing the price]
Madeleine: Well, thank you very much. I think I should be going.
Lisle Von Rhuman: SIT!
[Madeleine sits]
Lisle Von Rhuman: Hold out your hand.
[She stabs Madeline's left index finger with a dagger]
Madeleine: OWWWW! WHAT ARE YOU, NUTS?
Lisle Von Rhuman: Watch.
[She dips the tip of the dagger into the potion, then drips the small drop into Madeline's wound, which takes the age of Madeline's left hand]
Madeleine: Check okay?
Lisle Von Rhuman: Fine.
[as Madeleine takes out her checkbook and begins writing out a check]
Lisle Von Rhuman: But you must make me a promise. The secret that we share must never become public. You may continue your career for 10 years, 10 years of perfect unchanged beauty. But at the end of that time, before people become suspicious, you have to disappear from public view forever. You can retire. You can stage your own phony death or... as one of my clients simply said, "I want to be alone".
Lisle Von Rhuman: No! She's not!
[Lisle nods reaffirmingly]
Lisle Von Rhuman: Wow!
[Madeleine hands Lisle the check, as Lisle hands Madeleine the potion vial]
Madeleine: Bottoms up.
[She drinks the potion]
Lisle Von Rhuman: Now a warning.
Madeleine: *Now* a warning?
Lisle Von Rhuman: Take care of yourself. You and your body are going to be together a long time, be good to it. Simpre vive: Live forever.

[Lisle has just stabbed Ernest's finger with the dagger]
Ernest Menville: Ah! Wha-what are you doing?
Lisle Von Rhuman: I'm loving you.

[after seeing her transformation]
Madeline Ashton: I'm a girl!

[after seeing Mad]
Helen Sharp: It's alive!
[Cut line]
Helen Sharp: And it's beautiful...

[Rose is serving breakfast in bed to Madeline Ashton]
Rose: Good morning, madam. You look absolutely marvelous.
Madeline Ashton: Hey, wait a minute. Aren't you forgetting something?
Rose: Well, it's only Thursday - you told me just to say it...
Madeline Ashton: Well, never mind that. I think I need you to say it every morning.
Rose: Very well. "Oh, madam! You look younger every day!"
Madeline Ashton: Thank you, Rose. Thank you very much.

[Lisle scolds one of her "boys"]
Lisle Von Rhoman: Make some room for my friend, for Chrissake. But... keep your ass handy.

Lisle Von Rhoman: You're scared as Hell... of yourself. Of the body you once knew.
Madeline Ashton: I beg your pardon?
Lisle Von Rhoman: I am the one who understands. I am the one who knows your secret.

Helen Sharp: You're a powerful sexual being, Ernest.
Ernest Menville: I am?
Helen Sharp: Yes, you are. If I never told you before, it was because I wasn't the sort of girl who could say the word "sexual" without blushing. Well I can now. Sexual... sensual... sexy... sex... sex... sex...

Lisle Von Rhoman: How old would you guess I am? C'mon, don't try to flatter me.
Madeline Ashton: Thirty-eight?
[Lisle Von Rhoman glares at her]
Madeline Ashton: TWENTY-eight... no, twenty-three...

Anna: Mr.Chagall! I'm sorry, Mr.Chagall. I'm really, really sorry.
Chagall: Anna, don't talk, just go away. Leave us alone, I don't want to look at you anymore.
Anna: Oh, okay.
Chagall: Thank you so much.

Madeline Ashton: [reading the title of Helen's new book] "Forever Young?"...
Rose: I like that title.
Madeline Ashton: [Cackling] Ah, forever young... and eternally fat...