Tubarão 4: A Vingança

It's personal because I hate this audience-insulting movie. This has got to be the stupidest horror flick of all times. The ending (all of them) alone would be enough to justify this film's place on the bottom 100 list. I mean the premise (shark is after the Brody family for revenge. It chases (and beats) the Brody's to Jamaica to harrass them and snack on a few extras).

The effects went WAY downhill for this one. The shark on the Universial Studios tram tour is more convincing then this duct-taped-at-the-seams roboshark. The acting is atrocious (especially Mario Van Peeble and his grating "hey mon" accent)

There is Montezuma's revenge and then there is Jaws: The Revenge, in either case diarrhea is produced. This is really a terrible film, as if a shark would go out and take revenge on the family that "murdered" his cousins. Nonsense! It is awful to see Michael Caine in this film, I don't know why Michael appears in films like this, he must only do it for the money because the artistic merits of this film are zilch. Poor Lorraine Gary, went into retirement and then only to come out of retirement to do this turkey, and to think she felt obliged to as well, hardly a fitting finale to the end of a career. This film should have won more Razzies than it did but then against it was up against Leonard part 6!

Another Great White stalks the Brody family, this time from Amity Island to The Bahamas.

This is worth watching for the entertainment value of its story and attempted visual spectacle. It also functions as a lesson to movie executives (like Sheinberg) about when to let go of a franchise.

In a movie that is so universally panned for its story and effects it would be pointless for me to put the boot in further, so I will highlight what I think are positives.

Personally, I think the actors do their best with bad material. Lorraine Gary, Lance Guest, Karen Young and Michael Caine have moments when they make their characters feel genuine as opposed to just players in a dodgy production. These for me are the scenes of interaction between characters that do not involve shark horror. I am not saying many are strong, but I think some of them work.

Gary would have been capable of carrying a better story, as her emotions and strength shine through in various moments, but overall there is very little material that showcases her ability.

You can tell the filmmakers are clutching at straws for entertainment at times by sexualising Young's character in certain scenes, but at least she does make the character alluring. In fact, I think the scene where Michael looks out of the bedroom window, with shadows of the rain cast on him, and Carla flicks an item of clothing to get his attention is quite cinematic.

Caine plays his usual persona and his charismatic presence is enough to lift certain scenes but not the overall viewing experience. You have to admire the honesty of anyone who can see the positive by focussing on the house built with the acting fee.

I think Michael Small's musical score does a good job of enhancing certain sequences and making it more tense than deserved given the premise and footage captured.

Visually, I like the location shots in The Bahamas, as it makes for a suitably tropical backdrop for the action taking place. If anything it is a reasonably good advert for the Nassau area. I am not going waste any time restating all flaws associated with roaring sharks, the infamous finale and other generally dodgy nautical horror. It appears the actors and editor had very little material to work with in a rushed production.

It made a relatively good profit at the box office so I guess the Universal executives had the last laugh.

The movie is one of the worst I've ever seen. The attack scenes are worse than what I used to do with Fisher Price Town and a stuffed seal from Marineland. The shark follows them to the Bahamas; apparently for revenge...revenge for being killed in earlier movies! Or is the shark exacting revenge for his friends who were killed? Or maybe (and here's something they could have pursued) it was the WIFE of the previous shark who decided the wife of her husband's killer should suffer. Well she did suffer, by appearing in this movie. For Jaws 5 I suggest the surviving family members of Mrs. Brodie swim back to New York and start biting sharks.

I am completely dumbfounded. What in the world were the people behind this mess thinking? When the movie was over, Jaws: The Revenge left me with more questions than answers. Here's a laundry list of my questions:

1. How did a movie as good as Jaws spawn this junk?

2. Regardless of where the shark is in the ocean, how is it capable of knowing the moment a Brody sticks so much as a big toe into the water?

3. If you attributed your husband's and son's deaths to a great white shark, wouldn't you want to go to someplace like Oklahoma instead of the Bahamas?

4. Do all Bahamians slip in and out of their accents the way Mario Van Peebles does in Jaws: The Revenge?

5. Could they have possibly made the shark look any more fake?

6. Snails?

7. You mean that piece of welded together scrap metal was supposed to represent all that is good about the Bahamas?

8. Do sharks really jump out of the water like Shamu and roar like a lion?

9. What's more frightening - a great white shark or Ellen Brody's hair?

10. Is there a bigger acting whore on the planet than Michael Caine?

The best way to watch a movie like Jaws: The Revenge is with a group of friends. There's plenty here to make fun of.