Doom Asylum

DOOM ASYLUM is one of those movies that looks and feels like it was made up while being filmed. It's as if those responsible were out driving, saw the crumbling "asylum", and said "Hey! I know, let's make a movie!". So, we get the spooky location, littered with annoying characters, stalked and slaughtered by a disfigured killer. Said killer's face resembles a pan of baked ziti.

The bare bones script just manages to keep things together, making it semi-endurable. It does have a wacky sort of mindless charm, and gorehounds will slobber over the "drill-to-the-forehead" and "saw-to-the-face" sequences. Kristin Davis and Patty Mullen definitely add to the enjoyment! Recommended for those who require very little story...

Doom Asylum is divisive as it's a late in the day 80's slasher with sardonic, post-punk pre-grunge 'edge', low-fi aesthetic and is presented in distracting aspect ratio(s). What a Doom Asylum defendant's biggest hurdle to jump is the film's attempts at 'comedy'. Troma is obviously an influence here and i can dig that, but it is inconsistent and the film feels as if it's trying to deny to the audience it's own self awareness. A similar discrepancy found in those obnoxious faux-grindhouse films of the late 2000's. This awkward smarter than thou attitude came to define the horror genre from Nightmare on Elm Street onward until Saw and it is one that keeps me steered well clear of 90's horror even to this day, with examples such as Hellgate (1990) being a supremely irritating piece of nonsense to sit through.

I don't know whether it's because of it's release in a much misunderstood time period for cinema, the late 80's, the fact that is was shot in an actual asylum that treated STD's or that enough tropes of the slasher film remain in tact, but Doom Asylum has 'it'. It remains authentic and sincere despite the comedy. In fact, due to the inept delivery, it has it due to the comedy. It's a weighty time capsule that tells you so much about the period it was made in, it feels at times like a stream of consciousness taken straight out of the head of a horror fan from the time. A Fangoria subscribed, bougie crass video store geek who thinks he should know better but doesn't, but he just doesn't know in the first place.

Now before i go on about how post-modernism will lead to a satanist overlord uprising, i'll conclude by saying Doom Asylum IS a wildly entertaining independent horror film from a time when the industry had more money and enthusiastic contributors than it does now. It's a manic depressive, head on car crash combination of knowing parody and cynical exploitation and if you like your horror Gothic, esoteric and opaque like i do, then look no further.

Yeah, it's pretty horrific. The killer is one of the most irritating ever, but Kristen Davis. Damn. Spending the bulk of the film in a skin tight swimsuit and big dorky glasses, she is worth the price of admission on her own.

Filmed on location at the long-abandoned (and since demolished) Essex County Sanitorium in Verona, NJ. The film boasts some incredibly creepy atmosphere. The asylum itself is the real monster here, enormous, labyrinthine, scarred by neglect and vandalism, and scary even when filmed in broad daylight. This could have been the perfect locale for a low-budget horror classic. Give the producers THAT much credit. All that great scenery is squandered on another witless rundown of '80s slasher cliches. The special effects are nothing special either. As for Essex County Sanitorium, you may have seen some of the smaller buildings were used in episodes of the Sopranos. For a far better, but far from perfect abandoned asylum flick, see Session 9 with David Caruso.

DOOM ASYLUM is a pretty nifty little B movie relic from the home video era that succeeds by refusing to take itself seriously for even one minute. A gaggle of college aged nitwits decides to spend a relaxing day sunbathing and hanging out in & around an abandoned, run down insane asylum that is the home of a deformed, deranged serial killer. Meanwhile and all-girl new wave punk band has set up their gear & is rehearsing in one of the operating theaters (insane asylums have operating theaters?), with a Punks Vs. Nerds confrontation looming as the kids wander around inside of the shabby, spray paint festooned interiors of the asylum. One by one they are abducted by the maniac -- dressed in doctor's garb and prone to use medical tools as his torture weapons -- and hacked up until only the blond in the red bikini is left as sort of a male gaze oriented Jamie Lee.

That should be enough information to intrigue horror fans to take a look, and even the most jaded amongst you will be delighted by some of the gore & splatter effects, dabs of welcomed nudity and Kristin Davis reclining on the asylum lawn in a figure defining one piece swimsuit. She has quite the bod. The film earns some points by having the two "nice girls" spending the entire movie skittering about in their bathing suits, with plenty of time for ogling their delightful forms.

Some of the 1980s anachronisms might annoy contemporary viewers, such as the smack talking black knucklehead character dressed in fluorescent colors who is the inevitable first victim of the deranged killer. The maniac also spends a lot of time sitting around watching old Todd Slaughter movies, and sadly the film incorporates far to many clips of the old B&W films as a way to sort of suggest some form of contextual meaning. After a while it becomes annoying though, and the meaning of why the clips are used is never made manifest by the script. They are just kind of there because the editor apparently thought it would be a cool device.

The only thing about the film that I genuinely found to be annoying though was it's tone. Let's face it, horror movies are absurd & silly to begin with, and this one slips up a couple times with smarminess beyond what was really needed, threatening to turn what could have been a taut little exercise in Asylum Horror exploitation crossed with a Freddy Kreuger serial killer into a self-aware parody. If it wasn't for the relatively high body count, amusing gore attempts and nonstop T&A of the lead girls showing off their bodies this might have gotten a thumbs down. The best aspect of the movie really is this big, creepy, run down asylum, which never looks like a movie set so much as an actual place -- which turns out to be the case, and might have served as the inspiration for 1989s THE DEAD PIT by Brett Leonard, which would make an effective double bill with this one, or maybe DR. GIGGLES with Larry Drake.

The bottom line is that movies like this require the presence of an interactive, unruly loud audience to be enjoyed as they were intended: Watch it with your friends and make sure to have plenty of beer. It's very much a party movie and recommended for some night when you just want to get drunk with the crew, dig some gore and check out the babes. By keeping it's sights focused squarely on the gutter this movie maintains it's fun factor right up to the ending ... even if it isn't very good.

4/10: Grab me a fresh one too while you're at the fridge, there's a good Hoss.